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'Why can't you get it up?'

DEFINITION: n., A Christmas tree, ornament or caroler that, no matter how it is tied, tethered and tilted, refuses to stay upright. v., To be so full of Christmas cheer that you simply sparkle, twinkle and tip over.

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Orneryment

Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: awr-nuh-ree-muh nt

Sentence: Sometimes you just don't want to deal with those orneryments. First you can't find the hooks, then the loop that the hooks attach to come out. Once you find the perfect spot, it's too heavy for the branch.

Etymology: Ornery: stubborn. + Ornament: an accessory, article, or detail used to beautify the appearance of something to which it is added or of which it is a part.

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Slantaflaws

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: slant-a-flaws

Sentence: Finding a tree without slantaflaws, one that is perfect and straight, is hard when so many need slantabras to keep them from falling prostrate. We need to find one with a slantaclause -- one that comes with a guarantee that if our tree gets the slantablahs we can come and exchange it for free.

Etymology: slant: incline or bend from a vertical position + flaw: an imperfection

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Scrackerwhiff

Carla

Created by: Carla

Pronunciation: skrA-kuh-wif

Sentence: No matter how much Anne tried, she could not make the scrackerwhiff angel sit straight atop the tree. Eventually Anne gave up and turned to the sherry, in an attempt to get scrackerwhiffy herself.

Etymology: Cracker + Skew-whiff

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Ornapisa

Korinne

Created by: Korinne

Pronunciation: Orna-pee-sa

Sentence: Helen was frustrated because the normally upright tree ornaments now looked like ornapisas.

Etymology: Ornaments + Leaning Tower of Pisa

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Toemistle

apolloedge

Created by: apolloedge

Pronunciation: toe missyl

Sentence: It was scary only for a moment when Bob was hit in the head with one of his mother-in-law's toemistles, but the ones that missed their target looked fabulous in the odd places they landed. Everyone loved it so much that the toemistle became our most cherished Christmas tradition.

Etymology: toe: big digit of the foot + missile: weapon projected to hit a distant target

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Christmess

Created by: Maxine

Pronunciation: 'kris mes

Sentence: Look at that tree. What a Christmess! Say, you're not looking too well either. Better take a break, or you might Christmess before you know it.

Etymology: Christ + mess, as in "Christ, what a mess." Christmas, as in "The relatives are over and the kids are crazy. Christ, what a mess."

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Christmasculate

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: kris/mas/kyuh/leyt/ed

Sentence: During our annual neigbourhood caroling, John's six eggnog and rum completely christmasculated him and it took two carolers to drag him around from house to house.

Etymology: CHRISTMASCULATE - from CHRISTMAS + EMASCULATE (drooping, flaccid)

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COMMENTS:

Hope he didnt lose his baubles. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:08:00

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Chrisdisfunction

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: kriss sidd funk shun

Sentence: It was a case of "hohoho to nohoho as the tree suffered from the annual bout of Chrisdisfunction, due to the self inoculation by the erector against the cold by hipflask as he queued in the snow for the aforementioned tree.

Etymology: christmas, disfunction

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Mistlewoe

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: mis il wo

Sentence: When Ronnie decorates for Christmas, he always hangs up the mistletoe in the hopes that the pretty girls will kiss him under it. Sadly, he has never succeeded,he gets mistlewoe instead, because he hangs it from his belt buckle...

Etymology: Mistletoe (plant Druids worshipped and at Christmas today, if hung on door frame, the people under it must kiss)& Woe (misery, sadness)

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Christmasculated

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: kris/mas/kyuh/leyt/ed

Sentence: During our annual neigbourhood caroling, John's six eggnog and rum completely christmasculated him and it took two carolers to drag him around from house to house.

Etymology: Christmas + emasculated (flaccid, drooping)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-10: 01:39:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes Thank you purpleartichokes ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-17: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James