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'Why can't you get it up?'

DEFINITION: n., A Christmas tree, ornament or caroler that, no matter how it is tied, tethered and tilted, refuses to stay upright. v., To be so full of Christmas cheer that you simply sparkle, twinkle and tip over.

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Verboticisms

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Tannenbum

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: taninbəm

Sentence: No matter what it looks like in the lot, no matter how many ways he inspects them, Charlie*s yearly choice of a Christmas tree turns out to be a tannenbum slouching in the corner like an elf who*s had too much egg nog. Even the ornaments seem to droop on the tree rather than hang proudly.

Etymology: tannenbaum (German for fir tree/Christmas tree) + bum (a lazy or worthless person)

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Holidaze

Created by: milorush

Pronunciation: (n.)hŏl'ĭ-dāz'; (v. intr.)hŏl'ĭ-dāz'; (adj.)hŏl'ĭ-dāzd'

Sentence: My Uncle Arlen spends most every Christmas holidazed on cheap wine and a lifetime of regret.

Etymology: holi[day] + daze(d)

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COMMENTS:

I know this was an obvious one, but I couldn't resist. - milorush, 2007-12-10: 13:47:00

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Orneryment

Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: awr-nuh-ree-muh nt

Sentence: Sometimes you just don't want to deal with those orneryments. First you can't find the hooks, then the loop that the hooks attach to come out. Once you find the perfect spot, it's too heavy for the branch.

Etymology: Ornery: stubborn. + Ornament: an accessory, article, or detail used to beautify the appearance of something to which it is added or of which it is a part.

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Rumatumdum

Created by: looseball

Pronunciation: rum-a-tum-dum

Sentence: He looks rumatumdum keep him away from the eggnog or nothing will stand strait in this house.

Etymology:

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Slantaflaws

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: slant-a-flaws

Sentence: Finding a tree without slantaflaws, one that is perfect and straight, is hard when so many need slantabras to keep them from falling prostrate. We need to find one with a slantaclause -- one that comes with a guarantee that if our tree gets the slantablahs we can come and exchange it for free.

Etymology: slant: incline or bend from a vertical position + flaw: an imperfection

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Treerectiledysfunction

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: tree-rek-tile-dis-funk-shun

Sentence: The large crash we heard in the middle of the night could only mean one of two things - either Rudolph had tripped over the satellite dish, or our Scotch Pine suffered from treerectiledysfunction.

Etymology: a tree in need of Viagra

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COMMENTS:

Good one, Purps! I tried to go down this path, but found it too difficult! Flaccid Navidad to you! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-12-10: 04:56:00

Thank you, Ozzie. Same to you! Er... maybe not. - purpleartichokes, 2007-12-10: 07:03:00

ho ho ho - Jabberwocky, 2007-12-10: 11:48:00

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Christmaskew

Created by: Ransom

Pronunciation: kris-ma-SKYOO

Sentence: After countless hours of tilting and turning, Stan was still unable to break the tree's christmaskew appearance.

Etymology: Christmas + askew

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Everlean

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: evərlēn

Sentence: Horace is no good at picking Christmas trees. No matter how good it looked in the lot, every tree he took home was an everlean. Somewhere between the tree lot and home the trunk would develop a bend. A few years ago he thought he could dupe the fates by buying an artificial tree. No such luck. Somehow it was damaged in transit and it too refused to stand upright.

Etymology: ever (at all times; always)+ lean (be in or move into a sloping position)

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COMMENTS:

But my dad's name isn't Horace. He was also great at finding trees with major bare spots. - wayoffcenter, 2008-12-15: 04:49:00

Nice one! My vote #1 for you. - logarithm, 2008-12-15: 09:34:00

Nice - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:06:00

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Fallallallallall

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: fall/all/all/all/all

Sentence: It was a Christmas tradition for the carolers to carry heavily spiked eggnog to ward off the chill winds and heavy snow but by the time they got half way through their route the chorus of deck the halls seemed most appropriate as they fallallallallalled into a deep snowdrift.

Etymology: fall all + Deck the halls with boughs of holly, Fa la la la la, la la la la.

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COMMENTS:

Heh heh...been there and done that. Excellent work - Mustang, 2008-12-15: 08:37:00

Creatively funny! My second vote for today goes to you! - logarithm, 2008-12-15: 09:36:00

artr Love it. Very funny - artr, 2008-12-15: 13:26:00

It's catchy, too. The alliteration is kinda drunken sounding. - Ismelstar, 2008-12-16: 00:07:00

Terrific - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:05:00

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Gyreveload

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: jai-REV-uhl-ode...(gyrevelers, gyreveloaded)

Sentence: Mike and Christie thought they'd opt for a "real" Christmas tree this year, so they drove out to the countryside and purchased one from a reputable dealer who had set up shop in the parking lot of a defunct diner. When unwrapped, the tree turned out to be a real GYREVELOAD...crooked, unstable and surrounded by a festive brown heap of highly flammable droppings...much like the guy in the parking lot. It would take a kilo of fruitcake and a few litres of liberally spiked eggnog to get GYREVELOADED this special evening. Ho Ho Ho :)

Etymology: GYRate+rEVELry+lOAD=GYREVELOAD....GYRATE: revolve quickly and repeatedly around one's own axis,to oscillate with a circular or spiral motion; French-1856.....REVELRY:noisy partying or merrymaking; 15th century.....LOAD:the quantity that can be carried at one time by a specified means,a mass or weight supported by something,something that weighs down the mind or spirits,an intoxicating amount of liquor drunk; Middle English lod, from Old English lād support, carrying-12th century

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx http://isitchristmas.com/ - metrohumanx, 2008-12-17: 01:03:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-10: 01:39:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes Thank you purpleartichokes ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-17: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James