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'Why can't you get it up?'

DEFINITION: n., A Christmas tree, ornament or caroler that, no matter how it is tied, tethered and tilted, refuses to stay upright. v., To be so full of Christmas cheer that you simply sparkle, twinkle and tip over.

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Verboticisms

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Toemistle

apolloedge

Created by: apolloedge

Pronunciation: toe missyl

Sentence: It was scary only for a moment when Bob was hit in the head with one of his mother-in-law's toemistles, but the ones that missed their target looked fabulous in the odd places they landed. Everyone loved it so much that the toemistle became our most cherished Christmas tradition.

Etymology: toe: big digit of the foot + missile: weapon projected to hit a distant target

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Decoranot

Created by: jajsr

Pronunciation: Deck-or-not

Sentence: No matter how sturdy their tree was, Jim's favorite Christmas ornament was a decoranot. It weighed five pounds and would always make his tree lean to the right.

Etymology: "Decora" from decorate and "Not"

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Rumatumdum

Created by: looseball

Pronunciation: rum-a-tum-dum

Sentence: He looks rumatumdum keep him away from the eggnog or nothing will stand strait in this house.

Etymology:

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Scrackerwhiff

Carla

Created by: Carla

Pronunciation: skrA-kuh-wif

Sentence: No matter how much Anne tried, she could not make the scrackerwhiff angel sit straight atop the tree. Eventually Anne gave up and turned to the sherry, in an attempt to get scrackerwhiffy herself.

Etymology: Cracker + Skew-whiff

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Christmess

Created by: Maxine

Pronunciation: 'kris mes

Sentence: Look at that tree. What a Christmess! Say, you're not looking too well either. Better take a break, or you might Christmess before you know it.

Etymology: Christ + mess, as in "Christ, what a mess." Christmas, as in "The relatives are over and the kids are crazy. Christ, what a mess."

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Christipsy

Created by: flavord

Pronunciation: Chris-tipsee

Sentence: I can't get this tree to stay up. It's thin, I've had too much rum, and we're both Christipsy.

Etymology: Christmas/tipsy (drunk, falling over)

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COMMENTS:

lilts right over the tongue and the meaning is clear! - silveryaspen, 2007-12-13: 14:39:00

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Pisaster

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: peez as ter

Sentence: Brad and Kate's first Christmas together as a married couple had been one misfortune after another. It apparently is better to remove the turkey innards before stuffing the bird. Who knew eggnog was made with raw eggs? Pet poodles should not eat fresh mistletoe. Plus Brad had picked out a spindly Christmas Tree which leaned and wobbled under the weight of its decorations. It was a Pisaster Pine, decorated with bows of folly, fa la la la la la, la la la la! It was unfirgiveable, needleless to say. Kate got busy and tried to hide its flaws with tinsel and garlands, but there was no hope of making it a stately evergreen. It was a Tannenbum! When both sets of parents arrived for Christmas dinner, Kate & Brad were surprised not to be criticized for their coniferous conundrum. Brad's gruffy Dad said the only thing to do in this case, was to put some Viagra in the tree water to keep it upright. Apparently his bark was worse than his bite!

Etymology: Pisa (The leaning Tower of) & Disaster (a state of extreme (usually irremediable) ruin and misfortune "His policies were a disaster";an event resulting in great loss and misfortune)

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COMMENTS:

Love the reference! - emdeejay, 2008-12-15: 02:52:00

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Tiltitis

Created by: mamamia

Pronunciation: til-ti-tis

Sentence: After countless attempts to get the xmas tree to stand upright, Kevin then realized he had been sold a tree that suffered from tiltitis.

Etymology: tilt-derived from the word tilt(having its original meaning) and itis usually you can find at the end of certain medical conditions.

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COMMENTS:

Damn, i hope this makes it to the b! - mamamia, 2008-12-15: 19:36:00

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Everlean

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: evərlēn

Sentence: Horace is no good at picking Christmas trees. No matter how good it looked in the lot, every tree he took home was an everlean. Somewhere between the tree lot and home the trunk would develop a bend. A few years ago he thought he could dupe the fates by buying an artificial tree. No such luck. Somehow it was damaged in transit and it too refused to stand upright.

Etymology: ever (at all times; always)+ lean (be in or move into a sloping position)

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COMMENTS:

But my dad's name isn't Horace. He was also great at finding trees with major bare spots. - wayoffcenter, 2008-12-15: 04:49:00

Nice one! My vote #1 for you. - logarithm, 2008-12-15: 09:34:00

Nice - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:06:00

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Slanta

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: slantə

Sentence: Tim is full of the Christmas spirit. More accurately he is full of Christmas spirits. He is a regular Slanta. Upright is not in his current skill set. Another cup of nog and it could be a case of Slanta Crawls.

Etymology: slant (slope or lean in a particular direction) + Santa (an imaginary figure said to bring presents for children on Christmas)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-10: 01:39:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes Thank you purpleartichokes ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-17: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James