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'Why can't you get it up?'

DEFINITION: n., A Christmas tree, ornament or caroler that, no matter how it is tied, tethered and tilted, refuses to stay upright. v., To be so full of Christmas cheer that you simply sparkle, twinkle and tip over.

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Christmess

Created by: Maxine

Pronunciation: 'kris mes

Sentence: Look at that tree. What a Christmess! Say, you're not looking too well either. Better take a break, or you might Christmess before you know it.

Etymology: Christ + mess, as in "Christ, what a mess." Christmas, as in "The relatives are over and the kids are crazy. Christ, what a mess."

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Duglistfir

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dug list fur

Sentence: The town fathers had ordered a large evergreen to be planted in the main square, so that it may be decorated each Christmas Season as the "First Tree". A huge Douglas Fir had been imported from the West and although healthy and full, it had a definite lean to it. They nicknamed it the DuglistFir. At first people laughed at the Leaning Tree, but miraculously on Christmas Eve it had straightened out and stood erect. The people were amazed until they realized that this change was inevitable. The town in question was not called Viagra Falls for nothing!

Etymology: Dug (created by digging); List (lean or tilt to one side) & Fir (any of various evergreen trees of the genus Abies; chiefly of upland areas, popular as a Christmas Tree)and word play on Douglas Fir (tall evergreen timber tree of western North America having resinous wood and short needles)

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Blitzened

Created by: bzav1

Pronunciation: blits + end

Sentence: I got totally blitzened at the staff Chistmas party, and knocked the full punch bowl into the boss's wife's lap, during my karaoke rendition of O Holy Night.

Etymology: drunk + the reindeer harnessed beside Donder

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COMMENTS:

well you did 'fall on your knees' but did you 'hear the angel voices'? - Jabberwocky, 2007-12-10: 16:16:00

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Carollapse

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: carol laps

Sentence: The choristers set out at 7.00pm with their candles erect, songsheets aligned and vestments spick and span. As they wassailed their way through the village streets sampling the Christmas cheer, their silent night got louder and louder, the shepherds washed their socks by night until goo kin wenwenwenceslashshsh looged out. It was a complete carollapse.

Etymology: carol + collapse

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Leanerflop

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Lean-er-flop

Sentence: To mush eggnog is not a good thing when you're trying to decorate a meshed up Chrishmash tree. Shusie tried to tell Joshiff that tree was unstable...When all of a sudden it crashed down on the table! In frustration,Joshiff tied it to the TV and said, "Aw,Shusie that leanerflop Chrishmash tree has gotten the besh of me,it's time for more eggnog my shwee-tee...I'll jush lean over to trim the tree."

Etymology: Lean; To bend or slant away from the vertical. Flop;To fall or lie down heavily and noisily, To move about loosely or limply

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Toemistle

apolloedge

Created by: apolloedge

Pronunciation: toe missyl

Sentence: It was scary only for a moment when Bob was hit in the head with one of his mother-in-law's toemistles, but the ones that missed their target looked fabulous in the odd places they landed. Everyone loved it so much that the toemistle became our most cherished Christmas tradition.

Etymology: toe: big digit of the foot + missile: weapon projected to hit a distant target

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Pissedmas

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: piss d niss

Sentence: he was on the pissedness diet. driink everything. Eat only solpadeine.

Etymology: christmas, pissed

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Cheerlapidated

Created by: emdeejay

Pronunciation: cheer lappy dated

Sentence: Try as they might, Jenny and James could not get the old tree to stand upright. It had seen them through many a festive season, but it was time to retire the cheerlapidated old thing.

Etymology: Cheer: as in, Christmas Cheer. Delapidated: run down, worn out, etc.

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COMMENTS:

Beauty Newk. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:07:00

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Slantaflaws

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: slant-a-flaws

Sentence: Finding a tree without slantaflaws, one that is perfect and straight, is hard when so many need slantabras to keep them from falling prostrate. We need to find one with a slantaclause -- one that comes with a guarantee that if our tree gets the slantablahs we can come and exchange it for free.

Etymology: slant: incline or bend from a vertical position + flaw: an imperfection

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Treerectiledysfunkshun

Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: Tree-Rec-Tile-DIS-FUNK-SHUN

Sentence: The poor sap had a it bad. The treerectiledysfunkshun had developed over night and left us all feeling a bit droopy.

Etymology: Erection and Viagara and Limpy Poppa

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COMMENTS:

Dude, mine was SOOOO first! - idavecook, 2007-12-10: 18:13:00

Hehe! Guess you just Christmissed it! Hope ya don't feel like a recycled fruitcake. Merry everything idave! - purpleartichokes, 2007-12-10: 19:35:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-10: 01:39:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes Thank you purpleartichokes ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-17: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James