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'Why can't you get it up?'

DEFINITION: n., A Christmas tree, ornament or caroler that, no matter how it is tied, tethered and tilted, refuses to stay upright. v., To be so full of Christmas cheer that you simply sparkle, twinkle and tip over.

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Verboticisms

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Orneryment

Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: awr-nuh-ree-muh nt

Sentence: Sometimes you just don't want to deal with those orneryments. First you can't find the hooks, then the loop that the hooks attach to come out. Once you find the perfect spot, it's too heavy for the branch.

Etymology: Ornery: stubborn. + Ornament: an accessory, article, or detail used to beautify the appearance of something to which it is added or of which it is a part.

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Slantaflaws

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: slant-a-flaws

Sentence: Finding a tree without slantaflaws, one that is perfect and straight, is hard when so many need slantabras to keep them from falling prostrate. We need to find one with a slantaclause -- one that comes with a guarantee that if our tree gets the slantablahs we can come and exchange it for free.

Etymology: slant: incline or bend from a vertical position + flaw: an imperfection

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Shimmeringdrop

Created by: gemmgemms

Pronunciation: shi-mer-ing-da-rawp

Sentence: That man is quite the shimmeringdrop at the moment, he's had so much booze he's liable to flop like a Christmas pancake.

Etymology: shimmering:out of focus ofr sparkly + drop:to fall

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Chrisdisfunction

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: kriss sidd funk shun

Sentence: It was a case of "hohoho to nohoho as the tree suffered from the annual bout of Chrisdisfunction, due to the self inoculation by the erector against the cold by hipflask as he queued in the snow for the aforementioned tree.

Etymology: christmas, disfunction

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Duglistfir

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dug list fur

Sentence: The town fathers had ordered a large evergreen to be planted in the main square, so that it may be decorated each Christmas Season as the "First Tree". A huge Douglas Fir had been imported from the West and although healthy and full, it had a definite lean to it. They nicknamed it the DuglistFir. At first people laughed at the Leaning Tree, but miraculously on Christmas Eve it had straightened out and stood erect. The people were amazed until they realized that this change was inevitable. The town in question was not called Viagra Falls for nothing!

Etymology: Dug (created by digging); List (lean or tilt to one side) & Fir (any of various evergreen trees of the genus Abies; chiefly of upland areas, popular as a Christmas Tree)and word play on Douglas Fir (tall evergreen timber tree of western North America having resinous wood and short needles)

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Careeling

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: ca - REEL -ing

Sentence: The 'special' eggnog that Delbert had consumed had him careeling...forgetting the words to the Carols and barely able to remain standing.

Etymology: Caroling + reeling

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Listletoe

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: list ill to

Sentence: When Yul & Holly decorated their apartment for Christmas, they had trouble getting anything to hang up straight. They ended up calling one particular thing the listletoe because it meant you had to lean into your partner to get a better kiss. Hmm, maybe it was not such a bad idea...and maybe putting some Viagra in the tree water might spruce up their Christmas Tree!

Etymology: List (to lean to one side) & Mistletoe (Old World parasitic shrub having branching greenish stems with leathery leaves and waxy white glutinous berries; the traditional mistletoe of Christmas, which people have to kiss each other when under it)

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Parumparumrum

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: parəmparəmrəm

Sentence: Ralph was really trying to help decorate the Christmas tree but was having trouble staying upright due to the fact that he was full of parumparumrum.

Etymology: Pa rum pum pum pum (Onamonapia for drumming from Little Drummer Boy) + rum (an alcoholic liquor distilled from sugar-cane residues or molasses)

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Fallallallallall

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: fall/all/all/all/all

Sentence: It was a Christmas tradition for the carolers to carry heavily spiked eggnog to ward off the chill winds and heavy snow but by the time they got half way through their route the chorus of deck the halls seemed most appropriate as they fallallallallalled into a deep snowdrift.

Etymology: fall all + Deck the halls with boughs of holly, Fa la la la la, la la la la.

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COMMENTS:

Heh heh...been there and done that. Excellent work - Mustang, 2008-12-15: 08:37:00

Creatively funny! My second vote for today goes to you! - logarithm, 2008-12-15: 09:36:00

artr Love it. Very funny - artr, 2008-12-15: 13:26:00

It's catchy, too. The alliteration is kinda drunken sounding. - Ismelstar, 2008-12-16: 00:07:00

Terrific - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:05:00

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Pisaster

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: peez as ter

Sentence: Brad and Kate's first Christmas together as a married couple had been one misfortune after another. It apparently is better to remove the turkey innards before stuffing the bird. Who knew eggnog was made with raw eggs? Pet poodles should not eat fresh mistletoe. Plus Brad had picked out a spindly Christmas Tree which leaned and wobbled under the weight of its decorations. It was a Pisaster Pine, decorated with bows of folly, fa la la la la la, la la la la! It was unfirgiveable, needleless to say. Kate got busy and tried to hide its flaws with tinsel and garlands, but there was no hope of making it a stately evergreen. It was a Tannenbum! When both sets of parents arrived for Christmas dinner, Kate & Brad were surprised not to be criticized for their coniferous conundrum. Brad's gruffy Dad said the only thing to do in this case, was to put some Viagra in the tree water to keep it upright. Apparently his bark was worse than his bite!

Etymology: Pisa (The leaning Tower of) & Disaster (a state of extreme (usually irremediable) ruin and misfortune "His policies were a disaster";an event resulting in great loss and misfortune)

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COMMENTS:

Love the reference! - emdeejay, 2008-12-15: 02:52:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-10: 01:39:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes Thank you purpleartichokes ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-17: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James