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'Why can't you get it up?'

DEFINITION: n., A Christmas tree, ornament or caroler that, no matter how it is tied, tethered and tilted, refuses to stay upright. v., To be so full of Christmas cheer that you simply sparkle, twinkle and tip over.

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Verboticisms

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Floornament

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: flor/na/ment

Sentence: When we headed off to bed Christmas Eve our beautiful woodland tree was bedecked in the finest glass ornaments. Alas, Christmas morning the tree was bare and the carpet was littered with broken floornaments.

Etymology: ornament + floor

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COMMENTS:

Excellent word with wider application! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-12-10: 17:48:00

Love it Jabber! - purpleartichokes, 2007-12-10: 19:28:00

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Fallsamfir

libertybelle

Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: fall-some-fur

Sentence: We've tried three different tree stands, placing all the ornaments on one side to balance the weight and even drilling a few branches into the wall but the darned tree keeps falling over; the Christmas tree that Lenny brought home is a genuine fallsam fir.

Etymology: balsam fir; evergreen tree traditionally used as a Christmas Tree + fall

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Kinda like "Folsam Prison Blues", nay? - metrohumanx, 2008-12-17: 01:06:00

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Needleviagra

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: nee dil vy ag ra

Sentence: When Dick brought the scraggly Christmas Tree home, he knew as soon as he brought it in the house that it was not as straight and bushy as it had looked in the tree lot. He also knew he'd never hear the end of it from his wife,Carol, who criticized him for bringing such a crooked tree home. "What kind of a conifer do you call that, Dick? It's like the Leaning Tower of Pisa." "It's a new breed of fir called Needleviagra. One little blue pill in the water and it will soon be the lovely erect tree you wanted!"

Etymology: Needle (the "leaves" on a coniferous tree;to goad or prooke) & Viagra (Male virility drug)

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Slantaflaws

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: slant-a-flaws

Sentence: Finding a tree without slantaflaws, one that is perfect and straight, is hard when so many need slantabras to keep them from falling prostrate. We need to find one with a slantaclause -- one that comes with a guarantee that if our tree gets the slantablahs we can come and exchange it for free.

Etymology: slant: incline or bend from a vertical position + flaw: an imperfection

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Tiltitis

Created by: mamamia

Pronunciation: til-ti-tis

Sentence: After countless attempts to get the xmas tree to stand upright, Kevin then realized he had been sold a tree that suffered from tiltitis.

Etymology: tilt-derived from the word tilt(having its original meaning) and itis usually you can find at the end of certain medical conditions.

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COMMENTS:

Damn, i hope this makes it to the b! - mamamia, 2008-12-15: 19:36:00

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Parumparumrum

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: parəmparəmrəm

Sentence: Ralph was really trying to help decorate the Christmas tree but was having trouble staying upright due to the fact that he was full of parumparumrum.

Etymology: Pa rum pum pum pum (Onamonapia for drumming from Little Drummer Boy) + rum (an alcoholic liquor distilled from sugar-cane residues or molasses)

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Slanta

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: slantə

Sentence: Tim is full of the Christmas spirit. More accurately he is full of Christmas spirits. He is a regular Slanta. Upright is not in his current skill set. Another cup of nog and it could be a case of Slanta Crawls.

Etymology: slant (slope or lean in a particular direction) + Santa (an imaginary figure said to bring presents for children on Christmas)

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Tannenbombed

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: tah-nuh n-bomd

Sentence: Jerry could not remember the words to "Oh Cristmas Tree" because he was completely tannenbombed.

Etymology: Tannenbaum (Christmas Tree) + bombed (completely intoxicated; drunk)

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Christipsy

Created by: flavord

Pronunciation: Chris-tipsee

Sentence: I can't get this tree to stay up. It's thin, I've had too much rum, and we're both Christipsy.

Etymology: Christmas/tipsy (drunk, falling over)

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COMMENTS:

lilts right over the tongue and the meaning is clear! - silveryaspen, 2007-12-13: 14:39:00

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Everlean

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: evərlēn

Sentence: Horace is no good at picking Christmas trees. No matter how good it looked in the lot, every tree he took home was an everlean. Somewhere between the tree lot and home the trunk would develop a bend. A few years ago he thought he could dupe the fates by buying an artificial tree. No such luck. Somehow it was damaged in transit and it too refused to stand upright.

Etymology: ever (at all times; always)+ lean (be in or move into a sloping position)

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COMMENTS:

But my dad's name isn't Horace. He was also great at finding trees with major bare spots. - wayoffcenter, 2008-12-15: 04:49:00

Nice one! My vote #1 for you. - logarithm, 2008-12-15: 09:34:00

Nice - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-17: 04:06:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-12-10: 01:39:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes Thank you purpleartichokes ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-17: 00:14:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James