Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A tool which has been re-purposed and is now being used (perhaps unsafely) to perform a completely different function. v. To use a tool for a different purpose than for which it was originally designed.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Limplement
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: lim ple ment
Sentence: Eileen was attemting to use her recycled saw to trim her nose hairs. Unfortunately, it slipped and severed her leg, making it a limplement. She now spells her name I-Lean...
Etymology: Limb (arm or leg or tree branch) & Implement (tool, device, instrument)
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COMMENTS:
Are you sure her name wasn't Noeleen? - galwaywegian, 2013-07-04: 07:29:00
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Tual
Created by: kateinkorea
Pronunciation: TYOO eul
Sentence: Many months after her boyfriend had run out on her, Sally realized that she had to clean out the basement of Dick’s tools. As she piled them by the garbage she suddenly started to see another picture. These tools might have other uses. It began with duct tape. She discovered that everything in her kitchen could be fixed, held together, or constructed with the help of duct tape. Soon she was cutting garlic with a utility knife; marinating meat in a paint tray; using crescent wrenches or hammers to tenderize meat; and a drill with a twirly contraption on the end as a mixer. All of these tools had dual functions. This huge tual box had proven its worthiness and found a place in her new kitchen-workshop.
Etymology: TOOL: DUAL:
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COMMENTS:
Sounds like the perfect word for Alton Brown (from the show 'Good Eats' - not sure if you've seen it, but he's always using items from the hardware store in the kitchen). - Tigger, 2009-03-09: 11:09:00
Smile-icious! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 11:13:00
super - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-09: 13:54:00
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Conglomergreats
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: cun glom er grates
Sentence: Alan Rench was out camping. He liked to rough it in the mountains. His sawtoothed blade doubled as his comb. His screw driver stirred his beans in the tin bucket, simmering over the campfire, as it hung by the tire iron, held aloft by his jack. His plate was one of his hubcaps. His pocket knife did triple duty, for he used it as his spoon and fork, too. He sang the old saw "I eat my beans with honey. I done it all my life. It makes 'em taste quite funny, but it keeps 'em on my knife." He also used his pocket knife to scrape his hubcap plate clean. Alan's multi-duty use of all his tools made them his conglomergreats!
Etymology: CONGLOMERATE - mix of many things. GREAT - large in number. So tools that be used for a mix of many things in a large number of ways are conglomergreats.
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COMMENTS:
It's a bit of a tongue twister, but if you can eat your beans off your knife, your tongue won't trip over it! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 01:11:00
I'd LOVE to camp out with you! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 01:13:00
Did you know you can cook flounder on your engine's manifold? It's VERY eco-efficient ! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:18:00
I'd only cook a fish on the manifold for the halibut! And ps, silvery, they should be called BEEns! - Nosila, 2009-03-09: 22:53:00
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Machamorphosis
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Mak-a-mor-foe-sis
Sentence: Budding inventor Ivor Patent-Pending, cleverly adapted his ceiling fan every winter by machamorphosis so that it blew out hot air, thus being able to dry his clothes when the weather was bad.
Etymology: Blend of Machine(an apparatus using mechanical power) and Metamorphosis(alter, to change completely)
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COMMENTS:
RIGHT-O TJ!...and with a string attached, it makes an EXCELLENT cat toy! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:20:00
Machamorphosis....like a luvely flutterby! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 02:25:00
good one - galwaywegian, 2009-03-09: 14:27:00
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Disasterisk
Created by: metrohumanx
Pronunciation: dizz-ASS-turr-ISK
Sentence: Hacko's imported car had broken down on the Antelope Freeway, and as his deceased vehicle shuddered with the passing of each tractor trailer, he rummaged through the "hell box" of assorted utensils which took the place of a proper tool kit. Hacko was mechanically compromised, but he decided to DISASTERISK an amateur repair. Fortunately, he was not alone in his peril. Hacko's girlfriend and co-pilot/navigator was there with words of encouragement and derision to hasten his efforts at improvised repair. She handed him the HAZMOFLANGE, the WOUNDEVICE, the TRYTOFORCEITON, the NONFUNCTOROD, the BASSAKWARTOOL, the GIZMAYHURTCHA, the MISGUIDEPRESSOR, the MAYDAMAGEALLDEBAR and the chrome-plated MUTENSIL. After severing a tendon and skinning his knuckles, Hacko discovered that a DISASTERISK * was the tool most unsuited to to this particular problem. After sever bursting lacerations, he improperly used the DISASTERISK to hammer the engine into a steaming heap, demonstrated his version of "The Pain Dance" and stumbled down a hill onto a secondary road where he hailed a tow truck and ended his motorized nightmare...................................... * Nobody really knew what the DISASTERISK was, but some say it was purchased when Hacko fell under the hypnotic spell of a late-night infomercial and several bottles of fine Australian wine.
Etymology: DISaster+ASTErisk+RISK=DISASTERISK.....DISASTER: a sudden calamitous event bringing great damage, loss, or destruction, a sudden or great misfortune or failure; Middle French & Old Italian; Middle French desastre, from Old Italian disastro, from dis- (from Latin) + astro star, from Latin astrum.....ASTERISK: the character * used in printing or writing as a reference to various arbitrary meanings; Middle English, astarisc, from Late Latin asteriscus, from Greek asteriskos, literally, little star, diminutive of aster-, astēr.....RISK: someone or something that creates or suggests a hazard, possibility of loss or injury or peril; French risque, from Italian risco (1661).
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COMMENTS:
Always carry road flares, a roll of duct tape and a cool talisman when motoring. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 01:54:00
http://www.odd-tools.com/ - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 03:01:00
As the sun describes it's mighty arc over this hapless continent, I await eagerly the many creative wordisms about to appear... - metrohumanx, 2009-03-09: 03:16:00
I love 'MUTENSIL'. - Tigger, 2009-03-09: 11:03:00
Disasterisk...great word! - Nosila, 2009-03-09: 22:56:00
Excellent! - Mustang, 2009-03-10: 02:54:00
Wonderful :) - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:04:00
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Gadgetlag
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: gad jet lag
Sentence: Ever since Wilbur & Orville had sent air travel to the next plane, A.Fred O'Travel worked night and day to find something to help passengers get over the fear of flying. More specifically, he found passengers were not as much afraid of flying and as afraid of getting the dreaded jet lag, which could immobilize them upon disembarkment. So Fred made a device which helped passengers to calm down and not shout out as embarrassing statements as "They are going in the wrong direction" and turn them into positive statements, like, "We don't care where the pilots land, as long as it is on Earth!" Not only did this tool (which was placed in each passenger's drink, act as an anti-gadgetlag, it made the passengers remember a happy, ethereal experience, which made them want to book again and again with NirvanAir.
Etymology: gadget (a device that is very useful for a particular job) & Jet Lag(fatigue and sleep disturbance resulting from disruption of the body's normal circadian rhythm as a result of jet travel)
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COMMENTS:
Egad! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-10: 14:57:00
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Oooooooooohtensil
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: ooooooooooh ten sihl
Sentence: with one quick twist of the pliers and the addition of an electric motor. the kitchen utensil became an oooooooooooohtensil.
Etymology: utensil, oooooooooh
Mixmasterplumber
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: mix/mas/tur/plum/ur
Sentence: "Honey - this mixmasterplumber is working like a dream with the plug in the toilet and I'll be done in time for you to finish making the birthday cake."
Etymology: Mixmaster + master plumber
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COMMENTS:
Yikes! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-09: 18:34:00
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Flybomb
Created by: QuantumMechanic
Pronunciation: FLY bom
Sentence: He could not get the school kids to stay off his lawn, so he pulled a flybomb and mowed his yard every morning at 8am, throwing grass clippings at them.
Etymology: From setting off a bomb to kill a fly, destroying the whole room in the process.
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James
Thank YOU, James Gang...for the excellent illustrations! ARS LONGA VITA BREVIS! MetrohumanX
And thank you metrohumanx, for supplying so many wonderfully prickly ideas! ~ James
yellowbird - 2009-03-09: 20:52:00
Just the cartoon made me smile. No need to read the words today!
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James