Verboticisms

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: PEST-tuh-klawz

Sentence: When Bob hadn't left Christmas celebrations at the home of Roxie's parents by New Year's day, her family decided that it was time to look for ways to kinstirpate this perdurable pestaclaus.

Etymology: PESTACLAUS: blend of pest & Santa Claus. KINSTIRPATE: (kin & extirpate)-not my word: source??

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COMMENTS:

funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-12-17: 13:36:00

I'm a fan of Kinstirpate, but maybe it should be (kin + constipate), i.e. like when you can get the kin-folk to leave, your house is kinstirpated. - Tigger, 2007-12-17: 23:34:00

Ah, I meant "like when you _can't_ get the kin-folk to leave..." - Tigger, 2007-12-17: 23:36:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: pine/stil/ence

Sentence: The pinestilence invades our home every Christmas season and takes months to rid the house of this dreaded needle.

Etymology: pine + pestilence

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Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: purm-ah-need-ul

Sentence: With all the permaneedles she discovered under the rug in July, she collected them and made miniature Christmas trees and kept them until next Christmas to give to her over-staying-their-welcome guests.

Etymology: permanent (everlasting, perpetual) + needle (from the pine or fir tree, and also to prod or tease)

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Created by: MrDave2176

Pronunciation: nee-dl-net-tl

Sentence: Marla and Jack used the DirtDevil to once again pick up the needlenettle under the tree. Despite using the latest in needle-retention technology, the tree insisted on dropping them. Jack finally had to agree it was time to dispose of the old artificial tree.

Etymology: needle (to annoy or pick on) + nettle (to aggravate or haunt)

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Created by: bzav1

Pronunciation: scorn a ment

Sentence: 1)I was constantly sweeping and vaccuuming the scornament around the tree before it punctured the kids' missiletoes. 2)Finally, after all the other guests had left, Johnson nodded off in mid sentence. We slipped off to bed, leaving him there amidst the holiday accoutrements, a snoring Christmas scornament.

Etymology: scorn + ornament

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Created by: gemmgemms

Pronunciation: pest-ee-nee-da-lers

Sentence: She noticed a few pestyneedlers over by the booze and headed off to prevent a prickly situation.

Etymology: pesty:annoying or well pestersome + needle:prickles

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: cone iffer oshus

Sentence: Douglas Fir was a mild-mannered sap. His bark was certainly worse than his bite. He ran a Branch Office for his company and struggled to maintain profitability. Out of frustration, he ran for local politics and was elected. He was a coniferocious campaigner. People always used him to get votes and persuade the policymakers, but Doug would have no such influence. He just wanted to be the town Christmas Tree and light up peoples' lives. The only problem he had was that he shed a few thousand needles a day and when Christmas was finally over, he was a stick with lights on him. Needleless to say, his detractors who were larchly the undeciduous voters,would plant false stories about him in the cyPress. Despite what they said, he campaigned for the EverGreen Party. He was a tree Fir the People!

Etymology: conifer ( any gymnospermous tree or shrub bearing cones) & ferocious (marked by extreme and violent energy)

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COMMENTS:

Tree-mendous avalanche of chuckles, N! - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 17:39:00

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: car-pet-jag-gers

Sentence: Carpetjaggers are resistant to vacuums, and may still be found in your carpet for several months after the tree has been removed, so caution is advised when running in bare feet; however, after several months, they break down and become part of the room's floora.

Etymology: wordplay on carpetbaggers: someone who moves into an area to take it over -- carpet: floor covering + jaggers: sharp or pointy projections

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Created by: Redrover

Pronunciation: never+gree+nuisance

Sentence: This was absolutely the last Christmas that Nancy and Jason were going to spend the entire month of December cleaning up after either their nevergreenuisance tree or Jason's bratty nephews.

Etymology: nevergreen = trees that are in the midst of their death throes while still on the tree lot. Nuisance = obnoxious relatives

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Created by: jmichon1

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Doctor, do you think this Douglas Fir really needs a suckatreeotomy?

Etymology:

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