Verboticisms

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: PEST-tuh-klawz

Sentence: When Bob hadn't left Christmas celebrations at the home of Roxie's parents by New Year's day, her family decided that it was time to look for ways to kinstirpate this perdurable pestaclaus.

Etymology: PESTACLAUS: blend of pest & Santa Claus. KINSTIRPATE: (kin & extirpate)-not my word: source??

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: car-pet-jag-gers

Sentence: Carpetjaggers are resistant to vacuums, and may still be found in your carpet for several months after the tree has been removed, so caution is advised when running in bare feet; however, after several months, they break down and become part of the room's floora.

Etymology: wordplay on carpetbaggers: someone who moves into an area to take it over -- carpet: floor covering + jaggers: sharp or pointy projections

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Created by: Johnhicks

Pronunciation: Hol-y-Dos-sus

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: infestivus (just like it looks)

Sentence: Debbie and Art were planning a December wedding. To keep it from becoming completely infestivus, Debbie's mother suggested having it a week before Christmas so that out-of-town relatives might stay through Christmas and no longer. She was quite wrong. It turned into Infestivus Maximus with hordes of relatives hanging around until the New Year. Like pine needles stuck in the carpet, she could not get rid of them.

Etymology: infest (of insects or animals) be present (in a place or site) in large numbers, typically so as to cause damage or disease) + festive (cheerful and jovially celebratory) Derivative of Festivus Maximus (Baltimore Raven term for the Super Bowl)

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COMMENTS:

Pine needles are easier to deal with than relatives. They don't get insulted when you yell at them. - wayoffcenter, 2008-12-18: 10:07:00

clever - Seinfeld reference maybe? - Jabberwocky, 2008-12-18: 14:46:00

I like the name...i think you got festivus part from Ravens 2000 Super Bowl Run and added in...you got my vote! - timlumber1, 2008-12-19: 21:50:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: cone iffer oshus

Sentence: Douglas Fir was a mild-mannered sap. His bark was certainly worse than his bite. He ran a Branch Office for his company and struggled to maintain profitability. Out of frustration, he ran for local politics and was elected. He was a coniferocious campaigner. People always used him to get votes and persuade the policymakers, but Doug would have no such influence. He just wanted to be the town Christmas Tree and light up peoples' lives. The only problem he had was that he shed a few thousand needles a day and when Christmas was finally over, he was a stick with lights on him. Needleless to say, his detractors who were larchly the undeciduous voters,would plant false stories about him in the cyPress. Despite what they said, he campaigned for the EverGreen Party. He was a tree Fir the People!

Etymology: conifer ( any gymnospermous tree or shrub bearing cones) & ferocious (marked by extreme and violent energy)

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COMMENTS:

Tree-mendous avalanche of chuckles, N! - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 17:39:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: nēdiˈli ng kwənts

Sentence: Joyce didn*t realize when she invited a young tree into her home for the holidays that she was also inviting in needelinquents. These little hooligans had no respect for their elders and made every effort to separate themselves from the bough. They would lodge themselves in the fiber of the carpet and stab passersby with their tiny daggers at every opportunity. Even Hoover, the meanest thug Joyce knew had trouble dislodging these troublemakers. Just when she thought they were gone, she*d find more.

Etymology: needle (the adult leaves of a conifer) + delinquent (typically of a young person or that person*s behavior showing or characterized by a tendency to commit crime, particularly minor crime)

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Created by: bzav1

Pronunciation: scorn a ment

Sentence: 1)I was constantly sweeping and vaccuuming the scornament around the tree before it punctured the kids' missiletoes. 2)Finally, after all the other guests had left, Johnson nodded off in mid sentence. We slipped off to bed, leaving him there amidst the holiday accoutrements, a snoring Christmas scornament.

Etymology: scorn + ornament

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fir en siks

Sentence: It was time to call in Lt. Horatio "Eye Candy" Cane. You know...he of the red hair, straight face and cool sunglasses. His team would soon figure out where the infestation of green needles was coming from. Christmas was 6 months ago, so where was the source? Pulling off his cool shades and standing with hands on hip, the lieutenant said that the trail of firensics evidence lead to a bag in the garage, covered in dead boughs and green plastic. The ghost of Christmas Tree past.

Etymology: Fir (coniferous tree, often used a Christmas tree) & Forensics (relating to the use of scientific methods to solve crimes and to find out who committed them...the evidence the gathers to prove criminal activity)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kon if fer men tay shun

Sentence: It started the moment the Christmas Tree and the In-laws had arrived at the same time, a week before Christmas. The conifirmentation process. Tree needles everywhere and verbal needles about the food, the decor, the drinks, the gift choices, etc. At least the fir needles knew when to depart the host branch, unlike the In-laws, who thought that all could benefit from their "suggestions" and constructive criticism. "Next Year", she said to her husband, "We buy the air tickets for them and make sure that they are only here for a few days, not the current one month long visit!" Houseguests, as they say, are like fish...after a few days they start to smell.

Etymology: Conifer (any gymnospermous tree or shrub bearing cones) & Fir (any of various evergreen trees of the genus Abies; often used for Christmas Trees) & Fermentation ( a process in which an agent causes an organic substance to break down into simpler substances; especially, the anaerobic breakdown of sugar into alcohol;be in an agitated or excited state;go sour or spoil)

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Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: pine/kushun

Sentence: I felt like a Christmas pinecushion as I fumbled trying to plug in the lights.

Etymology: pincushion + pine

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COMMENTS:

Love it! - purpleartichokes, 2007-12-17: 18:04:00

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