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'Why are you vacuuming the Christmas tree?'

DEFINITION: n., 1. A pine needle infestation, common during and after the holiday season. 2. Prickly Christmas guests who will not leave and cannot be cleaned up. v., To fall down during a holiday party and hide under a rug.

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Verboticisms

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Coniferocious

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: cone iffer oshus

Sentence: Douglas Fir was a mild-mannered sap. His bark was certainly worse than his bite. He ran a Branch Office for his company and struggled to maintain profitability. Out of frustration, he ran for local politics and was elected. He was a coniferocious campaigner. People always used him to get votes and persuade the policymakers, but Doug would have no such influence. He just wanted to be the town Christmas Tree and light up peoples' lives. The only problem he had was that he shed a few thousand needles a day and when Christmas was finally over, he was a stick with lights on him. Needleless to say, his detractors who were larchly the undeciduous voters,would plant false stories about him in the cyPress. Despite what they said, he campaigned for the EverGreen Party. He was a tree Fir the People!

Etymology: conifer ( any gymnospermous tree or shrub bearing cones) & ferocious (marked by extreme and violent energy)

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COMMENTS:

Tree-mendous avalanche of chuckles, N! - metrohumanx, 2008-12-18: 17:39:00

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Pilemonkey

Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: pahyl-muhng-kee

Sentence: Ouch! I stepped on another pilemonkey. I thought we got all of those pine needles out of the carpet. ... Dan became a pilemonkey after he got drunk at our New Years party, and slept it off wrapped in the carpet from our foyer.

Etymology: pile: as in carpte pile + Monkey: a person likened to such an animal, as a mischievous, agile child or a mimic. OR Monkey: a burdensome problem, situation, hindrance.

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COMMENTS:

will you need a pilemonkotomy to get the needle out? - tonii, 2007-12-17: 22:56:00

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Scornament

Created by: bzav1

Pronunciation: scorn a ment

Sentence: 1)I was constantly sweeping and vaccuuming the scornament around the tree before it punctured the kids' missiletoes. 2)Finally, after all the other guests had left, Johnson nodded off in mid sentence. We slipped off to bed, leaving him there amidst the holiday accoutrements, a snoring Christmas scornament.

Etymology: scorn + ornament

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Carpetjaggers

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: car-pet-jag-gers

Sentence: Carpetjaggers are resistant to vacuums, and may still be found in your carpet for several months after the tree has been removed, so caution is advised when running in bare feet; however, after several months, they break down and become part of the room's floora.

Etymology: wordplay on carpetbaggers: someone who moves into an area to take it over -- carpet: floor covering + jaggers: sharp or pointy projections

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Yulegibbons

Created by: jmotsch

Pronunciation: Yewl gibbins

Sentence: Janice had been fervently combating the yulegibbons since January.

Etymology:

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Needlebain

Created by: roger153

Pronunciation: needle / bain

Sentence: Every year we have to put up with this same needlebain all over the house.

Etymology: pine needle mess

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Festilence

Created by: dochanne

Pronunciation: Fest-y-lence

Sentence: Joe was sick and tired of pulling pine needles out of his socks, tinsel from his jackets and various other christmas detritus from his clothes and furniture. The rug was hopeless, having been unceremoniously rolled up by an intoxicated friend who was himself a vexmastation (vexxing xmas infestation) and who had proceeded to topple the christmas tree and scatter needles, baubles, tinsel and lights asunder. 'Tis the season of festilence', he thought to himself as he vacuumed the rug again.

Etymology: Festive - of the season and the proliferation of easily dispersed and infesting decorations. The mood and wild abandon with which such infesting objects are dispersed and initially ignored. Pestilence - a nuisance or pest, such as the inevitable pine needles, tinsel, baubles, ribbon, cookie crumbs and scraps of wrapping paper that breed when you're not looking and bedeck the house after the christmas hiatus.

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COMMENTS:

love it - Jabberwocky, 2008-12-18: 14:45:00

Brilliant. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-12-19: 04:16:00

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