Vote for the best verboticism.

'We have securitized the lavatory entrance systems'

DEFINITION: v. To demonstrate your superior knowledge and intellect by using complex, confusing and mind-numbingly stupid jargon. n. A person who uses big words to inflate their unusually small ideas.

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Verboticisms

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Masterverbate

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: mas-ter-ver-beyt

Sentence: After Jim finished his daily masterverbating on everyone, going on and on about proper code of conduct they all felt icky and wanted to take a shower.

Etymology: masturbate + verb (as in verbal gratification through self-stimulation)

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COMMENTS:

Love it! "Master", as in I am so much better than you, should be in the etymology as well! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-06: 18:08:00

Laughed long and hard! Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 21:32:00

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Jabbertalky

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: jabərtôkē

Sentence: Lewis loved to talk with Carrol. She, for the most part, was unimpressed with his jabbertalky.

Etymology: jabber (talk rapidly and excitedly but with little sense) + talk (speak in order to give information or express ideas or feelings) play on jabberwocky from the title of a nonsense poem in Lewis Carroll’s Through the Looking Glass (1871)

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COMMENTS:

I LOVE JABBERWOKY! This is so funny, ARTR. - XMbIPb, 2010-05-17: 20:08:00

"Beware the Jabberwock, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun The frumious Bandersnatch!" - XMbIPb, 2010-05-17: 20:08:00

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Bossify

Created by: Eanrael

Pronunciation: Boss i fie

Sentence: HR knew that the new commission plan would cut the worker's income by at least 1/3 if not 1/2; they would have to *bossify* the presentation. Note: With the connotation that a "boss" would be happy with either result a) people ignore the plan because the wording is too complicated or b)they believe the plan to be benificial.

Etymology: Boss - n. - slang - Good, Excellent, Cool Boss - n. - a person who is in charge of an employee or organization — ORIGIN Dutch baas ‘master’.

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Pompalicious

kashman

Created by: kashman

Pronunciation: pomp-a-lishius

Sentence: Listening to the office manager's pompalicious description of simple office tasks depicts how much time she had on her hands.

Etymology: Pompous (excessive display of self-importance) + (a)licious [from lacere meaning deceive or lure; used in words like delicious (de =away) and bootylicious ;)].

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Normcrosbeing

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: norm croz bee ing

Sentence: Norma Crosby was the quintessential Normcrosbeing in our office. She thought by using big words (that she had seen in print, but apparently failed to check the definitions of), people would think she was far more educated than the Grade 10 level she had actually achieved, barely. When she had transferred into our HR Office, she felt it obliged her to speak far above the intellect of our internal clients, even if it meant inventing her own words. The clients were often left shaken and confused when she spoke in large words that had nothing to do with the topic at hand. As a result, people avoided her like the plague and chose not to believe any facts that she presented. Her personal crusade was that unless words were at least eight or ten letters long, why bother to use them?? It would be redumbdant and wasterly and youtilize no hexpediant deliverables.

Etymology: Norm Crosby - (Comedian, considered the Master of the Malaprop, who uses the wrong words, usually big ones to make confusing, funny comments.(i.e he speaks from his diagram and drinks decapitated coffee) & Being (a creature, a living person)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I swear we must have worked in the same place in a prior lifetime. - metrohumanx, 2008-12-31: 00:55:00

You are probably right...in "The Office"! And now you know why it is a hit! - Nosila, 2008-12-31: 23:11:00

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Patroisnize

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: pa/traw/nize

Sentence: Please don't patroisnize me - I don't have my PHD in linguistics.

Etymology: patronize + patios

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COMMENTS:

Whew! Strong creation! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:29:00

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Snobblahblahing

Aardvark

Created by: Aardvark

Pronunciation: Snaw BLAH BLAH ing

Sentence: Bill was always trying to impress the boss. In almost every meeting he was snobblahblahing his way through his presentation.

Etymology: Snob = believing oneself to be superior, Blah = useless talk (repeated).

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COMMENTS:

Nifty! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 21:40:00

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Bush

Created by: starwarsgeek8

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology: you know, W.(hat the hell did you do to my country)

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Dicktionary

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: DIK shun air ee

Sentence: Arry Gant is such a dicktionary. He likes to use fancy words to obscure the true meaning of what he is really saying, while making it sound really important. Everything he says is technically true; it just comes off sounding a lot better than what really happened. For example, he told us yesterday that he went to an evening philosophy lecture on campus last Thursday, probably because he thought it would impress this really cute girl who hangs out with us a lot. I was getting tired of his B.S., so I called his bluff in front of her and asked him to tell us some things about it. He responded, "Well, it was so esoteric and arcane as to be virtually impenetrable. I only wish it had could have been less rarefied and more prosaic." The girl, whose intelligence he had vastly underestimated, responded, "So what you're saying is that the lecture was meant mainly for people who already have knowledge of the study of philosophy, and so you didn't understand anything the speakers were saying because you probably haven't taken any classes in it. You wish it had been way more simplified so you could have actually understood some of it. Is that right?" All he could say in response was, "Uhhhh...yeah, that's basically it," before slinking away, claiming that he had to "go do something very urgent and important."

Etymology: dick + dictionary

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COMMENTS:

Good word and story...Arry'd make a great dicktator! - Nosila, 2010-05-17: 17:11:00

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Gobblededash

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: GOB-uhl-dee-dash

Sentence: Jean had a little in the way of technical knowledge regarding electronic, photographic and surveillance systems but she had a huge vocabulary and when called on to discuss those topics could be counted on to ramble on with enthusiastic gobblededash not realizing that most folks knew she was blathering.

Etymology: Blend of 'gobbledygook' (language characterized by circumlocution and jargon, usually hard to understand)and 'balderdash' (nonsense)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-06: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-06: 21:11:00
Love the 'toon today James. I think my boss is considering installing one on our bathroom doors, complete with an age-appropriate timer, which leaves me wondering when I'm gonna get a chance to pluck my eyebrows.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-07: 06:05:00
Thanks Purple, Is there a personal purpose code for plucking your eyebrows? ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-17: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James