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'We have securitized the lavatory entrance systems'

DEFINITION: v. To demonstrate your superior knowledge and intellect by using complex, confusing and mind-numbingly stupid jargon. n. A person who uses big words to inflate their unusually small ideas.

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Verboticisms

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Uberloquitor

Created by: XMbIPb

Pronunciation: /ü-bər-lo-kwi-tor/

Sentence: I can’t even tell you what George and I drank over the weekend. Nor how much of it we drank. Neither remembers. All I can say is that Master George – and there’s no other way I can call him from now on – is a bloody genius! Despite a massive hangover and absolute lack of preparation, he managed to UBERLOQUITATE the entire board meeting into extending our contract for two (count’em – t-w-o) more years! I mean I was sitting there with my head feeling like a cracked egg shell, while Master George managed to pull a presentation full of “gestalt,” “zeitgeist,” “sine qua non,” “parallax,” and at least a dozen words all of which had at least one vowel with an umlaut. I love that guy!

Etymology: uberloquitor (n.), uberloquacious (adj.), uberloquitate (v.) ----- UBER- (fr. Germ.): over, beyond. [Recently replaced other such superlative prefixes as “super-“ and “ultra-“ (see: “ubergeek,” “uberhack,” “ubercool”)] LOQUI – (fr. Latin) to speak.

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COMMENTS:

Ausgezeichnet story... - Nosila, 2010-05-18: 00:41:00

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Cruzely

Created by: DiPpO

Pronunciation: croe-ze-lie

Sentence: Most politicians are cruzelying most of the time, ofcourse there are exceptions. Bush, for instance is harly a "cruzeleur"..

Etymology: The first known proffessional cruzeleur (fr.) was called Kroezelekoen. Wich is African for "hairy chest". His style of speeking made his people name him "the great Cruzeleur". Later English tourists picked up the word and spread it around the world..

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COMMENTS:

Extraordinary! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:28:00

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Blusterblather

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bləstərbleðər

Sentence: After years as a spokesperson for the utility company, Jill is so versed in blusterblather that she has trouble understanding her own twaddle.

Etymology: bluster (talk in a loud, aggressive, or indignant way with little effect) + blather (talk long-windedly without making very much sense)

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Jargontificate

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /jahr-gon-TIF-i-keyt/

Sentence: All of Ken's employees and co-workers wondered how he had gotten his job, as an Information Technology Manager, since he was practically computer-illiterate and he could barely turn a computer on without help. He was a charismatic talker though, so even though he went around using inappropriate techno-terms and unrelated buzzwords, and he would jargontificate endlessly, he only sounded convincing to other computer-illiterate people. Then he mentioned his background as a Car Salesman, and it all started to make sense.

Etymology: Jargon - language characterized pretentious vocabulary and convoluted syntax, often vague in meaning (from Old French, gargon "a chattering" [of birds]) + Pontificate - to speak in a pompous or dogmatic manner (from Latin, pontifex "bridge-maker")

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COMMENTS:

Great last line in your sentence! Well selected etymology. Good word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 10:55:00

So many good submissions today picking was tough. But this one's a peach, so I picked it. - stache, 2008-03-06: 15:13:00

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Malaproporter

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: mal a prop por ter

Sentence: When Christine was in charge of giving instructions, she was a malaproporter. Her big, convaluting words and writing, often left the office staff with confusing instructions. When she ran for the office of Safety and Evacuation Officer, she was voted out, due to her unclear and head-spinning guidance!

Etymology: Malapropism (A malapropism is the production of an incorrect word in place of a word with a similar sound, resulting in a nonsensical, often humorous utterance & Purporter (the intended meaning of a communication have the often specious appearance of being, intending, or claiming)

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Lexibloat

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: lex-i-blow-t

Sentence: Profound felicitations settled on you in this most erudite epistle are legitimately postulated subsequent to your impeccable recitation at the penultimate convocation of the lexibloat fraternity. or "Well done". noun. This letter contians lexibloat. verb. Let's lexibloat this memo, so no one realizes we stuffed up.

Etymology: Used as a verb and noun. lexicon (vocabulary) + bloat (to puff up) adj. lexibloatluent +fluent (speaks easily) lexibloatsia add suffix from intelligentsia = those who practise lexibloat

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COMMENTS:

Nice word. - ErWenn, 2008-03-06: 11:08:00

I love the implied swelled head ... Swell word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:18:00

Great word! Perfectly describes the definition. - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-06: 18:06:00

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Masterverbate

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: mas-ter-ver-beyt

Sentence: After Jim finished his daily masterverbating on everyone, going on and on about proper code of conduct they all felt icky and wanted to take a shower.

Etymology: masturbate + verb (as in verbal gratification through self-stimulation)

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COMMENTS:

Love it! "Master", as in I am so much better than you, should be in the etymology as well! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-06: 18:08:00

Laughed long and hard! Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 21:32:00

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Gabyrinth

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: GAB-uh-rinth

Sentence: Bob thought that his gabyrinth, a form of English, but with a strange admixture of words gleaned from Old English and Yiddish, made him sound super intelligence.

Etymology: Blend of GAB: loquaciousness, prattle, chatter & LABYRINTH: Any confusing, bewildering, complex state of affairs

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COMMENTS:

love it - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-06: 10:33:00

Outstanding! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-06: 11:12:00

I like it too - bookowl, 2008-03-06: 13:08:00

Very creative. I never would have thought to go down the labyrinth path - I would'a got lost. - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-06: 21:19:00

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Jabbertalky

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: jabərtôkē

Sentence: Lewis loved to talk with Carrol. She, for the most part, was unimpressed with his jabbertalky.

Etymology: jabber (talk rapidly and excitedly but with little sense) + talk (speak in order to give information or express ideas or feelings) play on jabberwocky from the title of a nonsense poem in Lewis Carroll’s Through the Looking Glass (1871)

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COMMENTS:

I LOVE JABBERWOKY! This is so funny, ARTR. - XMbIPb, 2010-05-17: 20:08:00

"Beware the Jabberwock, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun The frumious Bandersnatch!" - XMbIPb, 2010-05-17: 20:08:00

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Normcrosbeing

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: norm croz bee ing

Sentence: Norma Crosby was the quintessential Normcrosbeing in our office. She thought by using big words (that she had seen in print, but apparently failed to check the definitions of), people would think she was far more educated than the Grade 10 level she had actually achieved, barely. When she had transferred into our HR Office, she felt it obliged her to speak far above the intellect of our internal clients, even if it meant inventing her own words. The clients were often left shaken and confused when she spoke in large words that had nothing to do with the topic at hand. As a result, people avoided her like the plague and chose not to believe any facts that she presented. Her personal crusade was that unless words were at least eight or ten letters long, why bother to use them?? It would be redumbdant and wasterly and youtilize no hexpediant deliverables.

Etymology: Norm Crosby - (Comedian, considered the Master of the Malaprop, who uses the wrong words, usually big ones to make confusing, funny comments.(i.e he speaks from his diagram and drinks decapitated coffee) & Being (a creature, a living person)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I swear we must have worked in the same place in a prior lifetime. - metrohumanx, 2008-12-31: 00:55:00

You are probably right...in "The Office"! And now you know why it is a hit! - Nosila, 2008-12-31: 23:11:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-06: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-06: 21:11:00
Love the 'toon today James. I think my boss is considering installing one on our bathroom doors, complete with an age-appropriate timer, which leaves me wondering when I'm gonna get a chance to pluck my eyebrows.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-07: 06:05:00
Thanks Purple, Is there a personal purpose code for plucking your eyebrows? ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-17: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by Nosila. Thank you Nosila. ~ James