Verboticism: Binstructions
DEFINITION: n., A set of product instructions, or a warning label, which is so obviously self-evident that it should be completely unnecessary. v., To provide unneeded directions, advice and/or warnings.
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Duhrections
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: duh rek shuns
Sentence: He normally followed all the duhrections, so when his newly acquired driving licence told him to tear along the dotted line....
Etymology: directions duh
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COMMENTS:
I\'ve seen a bunch of these guys out on the road. Nice! - artr, 2010-04-05: 07:25:00
Duhlicious word - Nosila, 2010-04-06: 00:14:00
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Ninnyguide
Created by: logarithm
Pronunciation: nĭn'ē-gahyd
Sentence: Examples of ninnyguides: ON A HAIRDRYER: *Do not use while sleeping. ON A BAG OF FRITOS: *You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP: *Directions: Use like regular soap. FROZEN DINNER SERVING SUGGESTION: *Defrost. ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP IN A BOX: *Fits one head. ON TESCO'S TIRAMISU DESSERT: *Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.) ON MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING: *Product will be hot after heating. ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON: *Do not Iron clothes on body. ON BOOTS CHILDREN'S COUGH MEDICINE: *Do not drive car or operate machinery. ON NYTOL (A SLEEP AID): *Warning: May cause drowsiness. ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE: *Warning: Keep out of children. ON A STRING OF CHINESE MADE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS: *For indoor or outdoor use only. ON A JAPANESE FOOD PROCESSOR: *Not to be used for the other use. ON SAINSBURY'S PEANUTS: *Warning: contains nuts. ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS: *Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. ON A SWEDISH CHAINSAW: *Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
Etymology: From 'ninny' - a stupid foolish person, and 'guide' - something that offers basic information or instruction. It means foolish instructions for the fools.
Qeduh
Created by: CDH167
Pronunciation: kyoo-ee-duh
Sentence: "Do not lick blade while chainsaw is running? QEDuh!"
Etymology: 'QED' from (quod erat demonstrandum), a phrased used at the end of a logical proof, Latin for 'ta-da!' + 'duh,' onomatopeic ignorance
Retarditure
Created by: day4ghee
Pronunciation: RET-ARD-IT-URE
Sentence: BECKY SOON LEARNED THE IMPORTANCE OF RETARDITURE AFTER DROPPING HER MEGADRY 21,0000 IN THE TUB.
Etymology:
Binstructions
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: binstrəkshənz
Sentence: Many products come with grinstructions, directions that are so ludicrous that you have to laugh. Others, especially those from power tools, have grimstructions with their graphic depictions of severed limbs. Ultimately all are binstructions, destined or a quick trip to the recycle container.
Etymology: bin (a receptacle in which to deposit trash or recyclables) + instructions (detailed information telling how something should be done, operated, or assembled)
Voted For! | Comments and Points
Redundaloquation
Created by: grohldberg12
Pronunciation: (ree-dun-duh-low-kway-zh[i]un
Sentence:
Etymology:
Redundinstructions
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: ree dun din struk shuns
Sentence: One of the main problems with globalization (besides losing jobs in developed countries) is that buying manufactured goods abroad leaves you at the mercy of the person translating the directions for use into the English language. One such example of these redundinstructions was a little plastic kitchen tool Henry bought called a Real Remon Sqweezer. Written on a piece of paper inside the little box containing this tool were the words: "Push tool inside the lemon's skin and turn the apple right until the orange juice comes running out of the onion. Wash off tool before seizing another fruit".
Etymology: Redundant ( more than is needed, desired, or required;repetition of same sense in different words; superfluous) & Instructions ( a manual usually accompanying a technical device and explaining how to install or operate it)
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COMMENTS:
Oh man. I didn't see this one. Either we did it simultaneously or, dang, I need to drain some more of that morning oil. - zxvasdf, 2008-11-05: 10:48:00
No problem,z, great minds think alike!! - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 21:41:00
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Oklikethatsjustsilly
Created by: legion
Pronunciation: that-cartoon-is-very-silly-right-like-who-and-when-did-anyone-find-temselves-in-the-shower-using-a-hairdryer-you-are-already-out-by-then-derrrrrr
Sentence: ok, this one worries me a little!..i understand where you are going with this but in all honesty look at the image and read the text....if you have grabbed your hairdryer to dry your hair in the shower email me......YOU NEED HELP...excuse me but this is very silly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and also very untruthful
Etymology: i won't grace this with explanation...one word.......HELLO!!!!!!
Reduhndants
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: re duh n dants
Sentence: The instructions for the new hairdryer Millie bought were a bunch of reduhndants in her mind. "Point at wet hair" & "Blow until dry" seemed self-evident to her. Too bad they forgot the old "Don't plug in near water" instruction, declared the EMT sent in response to Millie's roommate's 911 call...
Etymology: Redundance (more than is needed, desired, or required;use of more words than required/necessary to express an idea) & Duh (Used to express disdain for something deemed stupid or obvious, especially a self-evident remark)
Dulliterature
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: dull-LIT-er-uh-chur
Sentence: When she saw the instructions on her hair dryer warning her not to use it while sleeping or in the shower, amd the notation on the package of chips to 'open package, eat chips' Stephanie was once again reminded of all the dulliturature she'd encountered on other similar (usually imported) products.
Etymology: Blend of 'dull' (mentally slow; lacking brightness of mind; somewhat stupid; obtuse) and 'literature' (any kind of printed material, as circulars, leaflets, or handbills etc)
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COMMENTS:
Dullectable - Nosila, 2008-11-05: 22:01:00
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