Verboticism: Funishment

'I thought you'd want a head on a platter'

DEFINITION: n. A punishment which does not fit crime. v. To assign a punishment which is bizarrely inappropriate, and seems totally unrelated to the crime which has been committed.

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Higohoamercement

RightOnTheWin

Created by: RightOnTheWin

Pronunciation: (Hig-o-ho\mər-smənt);Hig-hi-ho\a-merce-ment

Sentence: John was sentenced to pay a fine of fifteen thousand dollars for speeding; however the judge ruled this higōhōamercement as unconstitutional.

Etymology: Orgin:Higōhō(Japanese romaji), adjectival noun. Illegal; Unlawful. Amercement, noun. To punish by a fine whose amount is fixed by the court.

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Dracomicarceration

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: dra-COMIC-are-sur-AY-shun (DRACOMICARCERATE)

Sentence: Judge Mentill-Case was not elected. He was a political apointee who wielded his gavel with wild abandon. Ever since his pet pug was flattened by a Lexus, he delighted in enforcing the hamlet's no-cell-phone driving ordinance. His punishment for a first offender was removal of all glass on the vehicle. Second offense entailed driving with snow chains on all four tires for a year. Third offense was DRACOMICARCERATION-confinement to a Volkswagon Beetle with the doors welded shut. The Judge's career ended when he crashed into a Starbuck's while texting.

Etymology: DRAconic+COMIc+inCARCERATION= DRACOMICARCRATION.....DRACONIC:of, relating to, or characteristic of Draco or the severe code of laws held to have been framed by him; Latin Dracon-, Draco, from Greek Drakōn Draco (Athenian lawgiver).....COMIC: causing laughter or amusement, funny, of, relating to, or marked by comedy; Latin comicus, from Greek kōmikos, from kōmos revel(1576).....INCARCERATE: to subject to confinement, to put in prison, to punish; Latin incarceratus, past participle of incarcerare, from in- + carcer prison Date: 1560,

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COMMENTS:

Here come da Judge...cute story. It took a latte to get rid of that judge! - Nosila, 2009-03-06: 18:42:00

Great triple word play! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:49:00

metrohumanx Thanks, kids! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 20:46:00

metrohumanx THE BEARS' "CAR CAUGHT FIRE" WINS ALBUM OF THE YEAR AT THE CINCINNATI ENTERTAINMENT AWARDS. On November 26, 2001, just 4 years after being inducted into CEA's Hall of Fame, the Bears won Album Of The Year for Car Caught Fire. Rob Fetters and Bob Nyswonger accepted the award shortly after Rob's solo performance of the Bears' "As You Are". - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 22:39:00

metrohumanx www.thebearsmusic.com - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 22:40:00

metrohumanx LIVE IT or LIVE WITH IT! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-06: 23:55:00

metrohumanx She was sick and tired of country life. A little country home, A little country folk, Made her blood run cold. Now her mother pines her heart away, Looking for her child in the big black smoke, In the big black smoke. Frailest, purest girl the world has seen, According to her Ma, according to her Pa, And everybody said, That she knew no sin and did no wrong, Till she walked the streets of the big black smoke, Of the big black smoke. Well, she slept in caffs and coffee bars and bowling alleys, And every penny she had Was spent on purple hearts and cigarettes. She took all her pretty coloured clothes, And ran away from home And the boy next door, For a boy named Joe. And he took her money for the rent And tried to drag her down in the big black smoke, In the big black smoke. In the big black smoke. In the big black smoke. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-07: 00:39:00

metrohumanx Sorry about that. I got carried away. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-07: 00:41:00

metrohumanx I'd like to thank the JAMES GANG for providing a very entertaining outlet for the mad ramblings of very talented people.. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-07: 00:48:00

Hear, Hear, metro! It's great to tell people you are in a gang! Respect! - Nosila, 2009-03-08: 22:26:00

The creams rises to the TOP :) You're so creative Metrohumanx! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:05:00

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Indecentencing

Created by: Negatrev

Pronunciation: in-dee-sen-ten-sing

Sentence: Graham was ecstatic. Due to the judge's indecentencing, he was practically getting away with murder.

Etymology: from indecent ( improper - not suitable or right or appropriate; "slightly improper to dine alone with a married man"; "improper medication"; "improper attire for the golf course") AND sentencing (The act of pronouncing a judicial sentence on a defendant)

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Felonelevate

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: fel-ehn-ELL-eh-vayt

Sentence: The jury was certain the judge had come completely unhinged when he decided to felonelevate the punishment of Winston and sentenced him to a year in jail for littering.

Etymology: Blend of 'felon' (person convicted of a felony) and 'elevate' (raise).

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Convictimization

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kon vik tim ize ashun

Sentence: It was pre-ordained. His name was Rob and by gosh, that is what he did for a living. He also wrote very bad checks. When he was caught and sentenced to 25 years in the pokey, he thought he had fallen prey to convictimization. He was incarcerated at Sing Sing, where contrary to the name, they did not sing, often or well. Warden Gordon Borden thought it would be ironic if Rob wrote the new Prison Newsletter, since he was so good at writing (bad checks). Rob called this literary marvel, "Sentences" and worked hard at it to make it informative and entertaining. He carried regular features, such as a column on advice to the lovelorn..."In-Mates" with such pertinent features as "Are you suffering from Penal Dysfunction?";The Daily Horrorscope ("Your life has settled into predictable routine but just wait, the new screw in Cell Block 4 has his eye on you. Prepare for excitement."); a singles column "Cell-ABC" and recipes from the prison kitchen, "The Garden of Pleadin'" ...for Chili CON carney...take 500 pounds of ground meat, throw in 18 cups of saltpeter,...etc. He also added news items that affected his readership: "Care and feeding of your pet Cockroach"; and he used the digital camera to get candid snaps of daily life column, "I've been framed". Rob became a publishing ty-con and made the most of his pun-nishment!

Etymology: Convict (a person serving a sentence in a jail or prison; a person who has been convicted of a criminal offence; find or declare guilty) & Victimization (adversity resulting from being made a victim; an act that exploits or victimizes someone (treats them unfairly))

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COMMENTS:

written with conviction!! - galwaywegian, 2009-03-06: 05:56:00

Top Notch Job creating this 'con' job and 'con' verbotomy! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:15:00

So funny!!! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-08: 10:30:00

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Maladaequojudicate

conflan

Created by: conflan

Pronunciation: n. mal'-ə-də-kwo-joo'-də-kət; v. mal'-ə-də-kwo-joo'-də-kate

Sentence: n. The O.J. Simpson trial was farcical, resulting as it did in an obvious maladaequojudicate. v. The teacher maladaequojudicated the student for eating in class with three years in an oubliette.

Etymology: mal: from French mal; from Latin male, meaning "badly." adaequo: from Latin adaequo, meaning "equalize" or "equal to the" judicate: from Medieval Latin judicatura, meaning "to judge" (judic-)+(-ate), a suffix occurring in loanwords from Latin.

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COMMENTS:

conflan In the twitter bar, the word is mistyped: it's maladaequojudicate, not maladequojuzicate! Sorry. :-( - conflan, 2015-09-17: 19:11:00

conflan Oops! It's also misspelled in the entry! - conflan, 2015-09-17: 19:14:00

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Misdemeanie

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: miss-de-mean-ee

Sentence: Parker copped a misdemeanie for parking his car in a no standing zone for 5 minutes. His punishment was to stand in the said zone for 3 days with no sleep in the pouring rain.

Etymology: misdemeanour (minor infringement) + meanie (a brute or bully)

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COMMENTS:

very clever! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-10: 15:01:00

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Missedemeanour

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: mist de meen er

Sentence: Judge M. Paired often assigned bizarre sentences that were not suited to the crime or precedent. In fact his missedemeanour way of paying back criminals allowed the worst to escape justice and the most innocent to face the music. Sadly, many of his peers do the same every day...

Etymology: Missed (got wrong; not caught with the senses or the mind) & Misdemeanour (a crime less serious than a felony)

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Castivacation

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: cast/i/va/ca/tion

Sentence: While driving totally blind drunk, Joe hit and killed a senior citizen when he ran a red light. The judge's sentence was, to say the least, a castivacation: four consecutive weekends under house arrest in his own home.

Etymology: CASTIVACATION - noun - from CASTIGATION (to punish in order to correct) + VACATION (a period of suspension of work, study, or other activity, usually used for rest, recreation, or travel; recess, or holiday)

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Justdesserts

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: JUST de ZURTZ

Sentence: Charles explained his deranged, pie in the sky plan to rob a bank to his brother Simon. Always jealous of Charles, Simon hoped the plan would fail and Charles would get his just deserts. If Charles was in jail for his bungled attempt to pull off this heist, Simon could take his place in the family bakery business and win some attention from his mother, who clearly favoured Charles of the two. Simon called the police and revealed Charles’s plan. Charles would be using the family bakery truck so that anyone seeing the van there would think he was just delivering pies, and he would be on his way out of town at 2 pm in the van, with the money. Simon hoped to assist in bungling the plan but forgot his basic mathematics, that two negatives make a positive. When Charles stopped off at the family bakery to say goodbye to his mother, after robbing the bank, he accidentally left in the wrong van. He took Simon’s van. Simon got HIS just deserts as he ended up in jail. In Charles’s vans were…just desserts. Charles felt he got justdesserts-plenty of sweet deals-after Simon went to jail: a raise and a promotion; Simon’s girlfriend; and the icing on the cake...a constant reminder from Mom that he was the “good son”.

Etymology: DESSERTS: sweet food served at the end of a meal JUST DESERTS: (the combination of the rarely used definition of the word DESERT: that which one deserves and JUST: for justice) to mean that which is considered to be deserved or merited; a just punishment or reward; poetic justice

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COMMENTS:

Intriguing word ... more please! Waited all day for the pronunciation, sentence, and etymology! But I understand you might have been called away and are superbusy. Will check back again tomorrow! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:40:00

Thanks for your devotion. This one is as silly as ever. :) (Yes I was very busy. These always come out at a bad time of day for me.) - kateinkorea, 2009-03-07: 01:14:00

love your story & word, kate! You'd think 2 guys in a bakery would make enough dough without robbing banks! - Nosila, 2009-03-08: 22:32:00

It was worth waiting for! Admire the great and humorous twists on 'justdesserts' - silveryaspen, 2009-03-09: 01:24:00

Very good! - Mustang, 2009-03-10: 02:55:00

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