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'What are you doing in the fast lane?!!'

DEFINITION: n. A driver who ignores the rules of the road by driving very slowly (i.e. at the legal limit) in the fast lane. v. To strictly observe the "suggested" speed limits, even when using the fast lane.

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Verboticisms

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Slowffeur

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: slo fewer

Sentence: Archie drove his ancient Triumph convertible every day down the freeway to his appointments and errands. He was a slowffeur and believed his car lasted longer if he drove slower. Luckily he was very hard of hearing, so he missed all the honks he got from his fellow commuters in the fast lane. He believed that a safe speed was one that was exactly one half of the posted limit. He was finally pulled over one morning by the Highway Patrol. The officer naturally requested to see his license and insurance papers, to which Archie finally shouted: "Never needed either, since I never go over the limits. I don't need papers, I know how to drive!"

Etymology: Slow (not moving quickly; taking a comparatively long time) & Chauffeur (someone paid to drive a person in a car;to drive someone in a vehicle;a person who drives vehicles for a living)

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COMMENTS:

I think I rode in his taxi once. - Mustang, 2009-05-26: 06:42:00

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Roadtard

youmustvotenato

Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: road-tard

Sentence: The line of traffic seem to stretch infinitely as the roadtard was trying to take the perfect profile picture of herself driving in the left lane.

Etymology: road+retard

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Roadhogger

Created by: logarithm

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology: Road hogger is already commonly used to describe road users like this.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx roadhogger verblogger footslogger defogger peatbogger baddogger deadjogger eggnogger wetsogger - metrohumanx, 2008-11-26: 14:36:00

Hehehe... :-) - logarithm, 2008-11-27: 14:37:00

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Slomomotorist

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: slōmōmōtərist

Sentence: It never fails, whenever Jim is in a hurry he falls in behind a slomomotorist. He should have known better this time. As he approached this virtual speed bump he saw all the classic signs, the over-sized sedan of dark bland color, the omnipresent turn signal, the silhouette of a fedora and white knuckles. The only thing that was more annoying was the guy in the next lane who felt it was his job to match the speed of the one in front of him effectively blocking him in.

Etymology: slow-motion (action appears slower than in real life) + motorist (the driver of an automobile)

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Fastlamer

Created by: davi8992

Pronunciation:

Sentence: I've got to pass this fastlamer.

Etymology: From "fast" denoting which lane of traffic and "lamer" as in loser.

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Accelerangst

Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: ax-sell-er-angst

Sentence: Philip was in a hurry, which seemed like what 99% of the suburbanites were most of the time. He just moved farther outside his comfort zone of freeways and fast moving cars to the fringes where the slow rural life abuts the encroaching planned neighborhoods. He thought having a bigger house and a lawn to mow would be a step up for him. Little did he know he would now be butting heads, or bumpers, with wandering livestock or an occassional combine. However now he seemed to find himself accelerangst up behind slow moving pickups, shaking his fist and downing a few swigs of Mylanta in one hand while honking his horn with the other.

Etymology: accelerate + angst

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COMMENTS:

Good word! The sentence reminds me of what I've soon got to deal with - the inevitable chicken(s) crossing the road and the farmer on the tractor who is oblivious to any cars behind him. - purpleartichokes, 2008-04-07: 18:08:00

Good Blend - OZZIEBOB, 2008-04-07: 20:39:00

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Slackfeetdriver

Created by: milorush

Pronunciation: n. slāk-fēt-drī'vər

Sentence: "Damn!" swore Dave, "I really need these slack-feet drivers to get the hell out of my way! Walgreen's is gonna run out of the half-off after-Easter candy!"

Etymology: slack + feet (sorta like 'limp-wristed' I guess) + [backseat] driver

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Lescargo

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: les kar go

Sentence: When old Lester gets out the vintage car and drives on the highway, he drives slowly in the fast lane to the annoyance of all others. When they beep him, he slows down even further. All the women at the nursing home call him a lescargo. Because he understands no French, he thinks they mean he has less baggage and is more available for dates.

Etymology: Fr: L'Escargot (Snail) & Less Car go

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Motortoise

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: mot - or - tus

Sentence: Elsie was a motortoise on the highway; she thought the passing lane was the lane you stayed in so everyone could pass you.

Etymology: motorist, tortoise (Belonging to any of several species of turtles that live strictly on land)

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COMMENTS:

Good one...she must be shell-shocked! - Nosila, 2009-05-26: 16:02:00

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Slotorist

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: slōtərist

Sentence: It never fails. The only day that you are behind schedule, you get stuck in back of a slotorist. Through the rear window all you can see is a fedora and a set of wrinkled white knuckles. The brake lights pop on at every curve or dip in the road. Just when you think you\'ll explode, you get a section of the road where you can pass. On you go to make up some time only to get pulled for speeding. The procedure takes a few minutes. Just long enough for you to resume your position behind Methuselah.

Etymology: slow (not quick or fast) + motorist (driver of an automobile)

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COMMENTS:

been there done that - Nosila, 2010-06-11: 11:56:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-04-07: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by stache and Biscotti. Thank you stache and Biscotti. ~ James

arrrteest - 2008-04-07: 17:40:00
A friend of mine always said, "Beware of old men in hats driving Buicks." I remember driving up the NJ Turnpike at 75MPH and pushing 80 in the right lane and being flashed by motorists thinking I was going too slow!

purpleartichokes - 2008-04-07: 18:03:00
My dad always said "Beware of men smoking cigars and driving station wagons." Wouldn't ya know, my first close call was with one of them?

logarithm - 2008-11-27: 11:18:00
Hehehe...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-05-26: 00:05:00
Today's definition was suggested by Biscotti. Thank you Biscotti. ~ James

PennonFurl - 2018-06-13: 19:02:00