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'Honey? Honey! Can you hear me?'

DEFINITION: n., A slow computer with insufficient memory; also, a slow-thinking husband. v., To take an extraordinarily long time to respond to a relatively simple request.

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Verboticisms

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Datasaurus

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /dah-tuh-SAWR-uhs/

Sentence: Sarah complained to Jerry, again, that their computer was such a datasaurus, she could take a shower, do her hair and make-up, prepare breakfast, eat, and do the dishes, all before the 'darn thing' was finished booting up. Apparently, he was still plodcessing over that information, after several months of her complaints.

Etymology: data - information (Latin, plural of 'datum') + -saurus - suffix used in the names of extinct reptiles; e.g. brontosaurus (Greek, saûros "lizard")

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Pokeyman

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: po kee man

Sentence: When Polly could no longer wait for her slow computer, she complained to her husband, Paul. He took forever to process her request and so she decided she could not rely on her pokeyman to help her play her Pokémon anytime soon. Polly has now upgraded her computer and her husband.

Etymology: Pokey (slow) & Man (male spose) & Wordplay on Pokémon (Video games series)

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Cronstipated

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: kron-sti-pay-tid

Sentence: I guess I added too many bells and whistles to my computer, as it became quite cronstipated upon booting up.

Etymology: cron - A Unix command for scheduling jobs to be executed sometime in the future; constipated

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COMMENTS:

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-01-07: 12:07:00

great sentence! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-07: 18:13:00

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Eonator

Created by: HollisWoods

Pronunciation: ee-uhn, ee-on eyt or

Sentence: Francesca is a researcher for various clients in Wash, D.C. Most of the research required needs to be done online and is usually accompanied by,"I need this yesterday!" There is a power failure in her office, so she is going to have to work from home. Now she is in a near panic because her home office doesn't have the sophisticated equipment she has at the downtown office. Francesca's hubby promised he would either upgrade or replace most of her equipment as a gift to her. This is a promise and process long overdue. Now she is in a bind and is concerned she won't meet her clients' deadlines. She is tired and frustrated by her eonator of a husband and her eonator of a computer. She will have to rely on her collegue, Susan, to help her. At least she finds some relief in the knowledge that she will have Susan's assistance and access to state-of-the-art equipment to meet the deadlines due. While traveling to Susan's office, Francesca couldn't help but wonder if her husband was home eonating on how and when to start her office upgrade.

Etymology: eon: an indefinitely long period of time ate: cause or make

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Islack

libertybelle

Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: i-slak

Sentence: I don;t know who's the bigger i-slack: my slow virus riddled computer or my lazy husband who sits in front of it all day looking at naughty sites.

Etymology: i-mac: popular computer brand + slack

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Calcuwait

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: cal-cyou-wait

Sentence: My computer, my husband, my boss, and my kids, drive me crazy with their calcuwaiting.

Etymology: A play on calculate,you and wait ... calcuwait ... a verb to describe any thing or anyone who is slow to respond!

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Terminil

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: tərmənil

Sentence: Despite Jason’s claim of being as smart as a computer, when Jane asks for an opinion, all she gets is buffering. Their relationship is just about terminil.

Etymology: terminal (a device at which a user enters data or commands for a computer system and that displays the received output) + nil(nothing)

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Dimwidget

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: dimwijit

Sentence: Joyce isn*t sure why but she still carries around her antique, dimwidget Palm Pilot. It*s slow to use, has few functions that she couldn*t achieve with a scrap of paper and it glitches out whenever she actually needs it to perform a function. When she complains to her dimwidget husband, his only suggestion is that she get new batteries. She just might replace both items soon.

Etymology: dimwit (a stupid or silly person) +widget (a small gadget or mechanical device)

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Spousalpause

Created by: bosstown

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Linda stopped asking "Does this dress look alright"? after developing an intolerance for spousalpause.

Etymology:

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Decelermate

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: de sel er mayt

Sentence: Allegra had never quite gotten used to the fact that her hubby, Dell, could decelermate any discussion or activity. He appeared to act and think and speak in slow motion and with age, this lethargy became more noticeable. When she asked him about replacing her very slow old computer, he was actually slower than the computer in responding. It is little wonder why he was dropped off at the recycling centre with all the other useless equipment.

Etymology: Decelerate (lose velocity; move more slowly) & Mate (spouse, partner in marriage/relationship)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-01-07: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by gemmgemms. Thank you gemmgemms. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-04-02: 00:06:00
Today's definition was suggested by gemmgemms. Thank you gemmgemms. ~ James