Verboticisms

Created by: XMbIPb

Pronunciation: /zo-o-tard/ (note: each of the “o”s is a distinct sound as in “zoology,” for example; /zu-tard/ is INcorrect)

Sentence: Q. “Can you believe it?! We left our pet beagle with my idiot brother-in-law for a mere fortnight and that zootard taught it how to leg-hump anyone who sits in my favourite recliner!” A. “What’s so strange about that? I thought all dogs leg-hump?” Q. “Male dogs do. But Betsy’s a bitch!”

Etymology: zoo – fr. Greek for “animal” -tard – a slang root derived from the word “retard”

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: əngkəloōd

Sentence: The kids loved it when Uncle Lew came to visit or to babysit. Cindy is a bit hesitant to ask him to watch the kids. She was never sure what unclewd trick or stunt he would teach them. Last time it was **pull my finger** for the 2-year-old. The time before that, Michael Jackson-style crotch grabs for the 4-year-old. What next?

Etymology: uncle (the brother of one*s father or mother or the husband of one\'s aunt) + lewd (crude and offensive in a sexual way)

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Created by: frungavoot

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Created by: newmaa14

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology: Mal-meaning bad and Eurido- latin for teach

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kəsˈtōdēən

Sentence: Sending Billy to spend the Summer with his Grandpa seemed like a great idea at first. It turns out that PaPa is a terrific cusstodian. Sally sent away a cute, sweet 4-year old and retrieved a foul-mouth terror. The first inkling she had was when asked Billy to help collect and load his stuff into the car. "Get it yourself, bitch!". She was stunned. PaPa's snickering didn't make her feel any better.

Etymology: cuss (an offensive word or phrase used to express anger or annoyance) custodian (somebody who is in charge or looks after something or someone)

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COMMENTS:

My dad taught my kids how to spit for distance!!! Great word! - wayoffcenter, 2008-12-10: 08:34:00

Dang it that's a good word! - Nosila, 2008-12-10: 21:36:00

Good one..reminds me of Uncle Phil. - Mustang, 2008-12-10: 22:46:00

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: un-cool-tom-foo-la-ree

Sentence: what uncooltomfoolery is this? I leave you in your uncle's care for just 1 day and he has set about untraining the good habits we instilled in you. Now scrub off that ridiculous tattoo and put the bottle back in the wine rack.

Etymology: uncool (not approved) + uncle (someone often entrusted to care for nieces and nephews) + tomfoolery (nonsense) + uncle tom (yes i have one of those)

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: ha - bet - ah - pet

Sentence: Jerry regretted that he had participated in habetapet after leaving his dog, Gina with his friend Craig. He felt that it was really his fault that she had picked up several new bad behaviors, like jumping on everyone who walked through the door, excessive begging and worse of all, he had taught her how to flirt.....if that was possible.

Etymology: A combination of Habit with a twisted spelling (a behavior that is repeated) + abet (to aid or encourage, usually in some wrong doing) + Pet (a domesticated animal kept for companionship or amusement)

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Created by: dochanne

Pronunciation: Cust owe dee um

Sentence: Daniel sighed in relief to be home. The month-long work trip had incultivated various nasty habits he planned to exorcise, but first poor George had to be retrieved from the neighbour. The bird seemed happy to see him, hopping up and down, flapping it's wings. "Farqueue!" said the bird. "Farqueue!Farqueue!" And Daniel just stared. Beside him sniggered the teenage son, responsible no doubt for this true cusstodium, his parrot no longer suitable for nursing home visits.

Etymology: Cuss - to use naughty words; Custodian - caretaker; Odium - obnoxious thing. Naughty obnxious words acquired from one's caretaker.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: caw rupt

Sentence: My biggest pollygripe about picking up my pet parrot,Polly Walnuts, from my brother after my vacation was to find that he tried to cawrupt the Gullible bird. Instead of saying his usual "Polly wanna cracker", my brother taught him to swear and to answer the phone and impersonate others. He'd say his name was Capt.Jack Sparrow or Peter Finch or Walter Pigeon or Bird Reynolds or Jay Leno or Dan Quail or Denny Crane or Robin Leach or Russell Crow or Feather Locklear or Placido Flamingo. He also taught him rude sentences like, "Come over and I'll show you a cockatoo" or "You should see the big Parakeets in the next cage" and "You're a Raven Loonatic". One thing about birds is that you cannot unteach them to say something once it is wired into their tiny brains on a Condor that they aren't too Swift and that is something that is very hard to Swallow!

Etymology: corrupt (alter from the original;place under suspicion or cast doubt upon; containing errors or alterations)& Caw (a sound made by birds)

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COMMENTS:

That gave your parrot something to crow about. - Mustang, 2008-12-10: 22:48:00

This is funny....got my vote... - mweinmann, 2008-12-11: 18:27:00

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Created by: freiflug

Pronunciation: /kəˈreskɒnvəˈluːted/

Sentence: "After I have received my turtle Frances back from my brother-in-law, all he does is nibbling the telephone cable. Frances has totally been caressconvoluted."

Etymology: caress: to touch or kiss lovingly; to fondle convulsion: an intense, paroxysmal, involuntary muscular contraction; an uncontrolled fit, as of laughter; a paroxysm Convulsion hereby alters/modifies the meaning of "caress", concluding in a somewhat spoiled interpretation of caressing sth. or so.

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