Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: snub skrybe

Sentence: "It's no wonder people shoplift", Betty thought as she waited yet again at Customer Service to make a payment on her layaway. The cashier was going to snubscribe her again because he was too busy yakking on his cellphone on a social call. Fed up, she went to the Store Manager and told him loudly that the hardest part about shopping there was the fact that you had to wait endlessly for them to take your money. The Store Manager would have responded to her sooner, but he was too busy texting someone...

Etymology: Snub (refuse to acknowledge;ignore) & Subscribe (receive or obtain by regular payment;pay (an amount of money) as a contribution to a charity or service, especially at regular intervals)

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: cus/tum/ur/swurv/iss

Sentence: Customerswervice was so bad that I couldn't even make eye contact with the cashier let alone pay for my purchases.

Etymology: customer service + swerve

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COMMENTS:

They also swerve who only fail to wait on us. Good one. - Mustang, 2008-05-13: 20:24:00

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Created by: tim1998samson

Pronunciation: diminion marsion

Sentence: I had another one of those diminionmartion cash me out today I mean diminion's my favourite store but when a diminionmartion checks me out it's the worst.

Etymology: A mix of diminion and martion.

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COMMENTS:

For those of you who don't know diminion was a grocery store that was recently was taken over by Metro - tim1998samson, 2009-06-29: 08:14:00

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /pey-trun-EY-jent/

Sentence: Denise was a regular customer at Le Chic Boutique, but the new patronagent at the counter treated her as if she were some person off the street, and pointedly ignored her for several minutes while chitchatting with his coworker before snatching her credit card, and then slamming a pen and receipt down in front of her. She was infuriated at his rude behavior... yet strangely turned on, too.

Etymology: Patronage - a condescending manner or attitude in dealing with people; patronizing (from Old French, patroniser "power to give favors") + Agent - a representative of a business or firm (from Latin, agentum "one who acts or conducts action")

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Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: patron+neglect

Sentence: Patroneglect at the mall was almost bad enough to make me yearn for the steady but excruciatingly slow attention customers get at the Post Office.

Etymology: patron+neglect

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: dĭ-sō'shē-ĭt

Sentence: After she made her way back to the electronics department, having to make her way past one dissociate after another who, apparently oblivious to her existence or that of any other customer, had no apparent function beyond taking up aisle space, the blue-smocked critters became scarce. When she finally found one and asked where she could find an adapter to use her ipod with her home stereo, the dull-eyed response was, "that's not my aisle, but if we have 'em they would definitely be in this half of the store."

Etymology: dissociate (-āt'), from the psychological defense mechanism dissociation, whereby an individual compartmentalizes certain thoughts, emotions, sensations, and/or memories; term coined by The French psychiatrist Pierre Janet, later expanded on in Jung's theories; associate (-ĭt), term used by a certain (world's largest)retailer as a euphamism for what passes as a sales staff.

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COMMENTS:

Like it! - pieceof314, 2008-05-13: 13:29:00

thanks, 314. first time I've tried to give a verbotomy to an existing word. - stache, 2008-05-13: 17:02:00

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Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: sales-ass-hol-sternt

Sentence: i chose to leave the store rather than hand over money to that salesassholestant

Etymology: sales assistant, asshole

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: cells-rep

Sentence: Adept at multitasking, Sean excelled as a cellsrep by chatting with his girlfriend, waiting on customers and doing his geometry homework all at the same time.

Etymology: cells: cellular + rep (short for representative) as in sales rep.

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Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: slack er cash er

Sentence: Bill first thought the store had planted a mannequin, arms crossed, at the cash desk. She possessed a vacant stare and exhibited limited life. He stood perplexed, waited for the slackercasher to get into motion. Patience turned to desperation as he heard another cusstomer behind him snarl for help. “OK LET’S GET SOME SERVICE HERE, we don’t have all day!” The slackercasher did get into action: she picked up her cell and began typing a text! Bill resigned to step over to wait in a long line of another aisle.

Etymology: From slacker and casher or cashier.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: at ten duns

Sentence: Jason was typical of the attendunts a retail store can afford, someone who spent his whole shift texting and phoning friends. Jason made people sorry they stopped by. When the CEO came on a Royal Visit, the whole entourage got busy and decorated the store. Except Jason, who told his immediate supervisor (who was 17) that he had to catch up on his filing. I smell an audit coming. Jason is now filing again...his unemployment papers.

Etymology: Attendant (cashier or clerk) & Dunts (To strike; give a blow to; knock) &dunce (stupid person)

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