Verboticisms

Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: dis-kuss-fem-izm

Sentence: Tony was sitting in a chair in the principal's office again. "Tony, can you explain to me what you meant by 'dime beach?'" "Yeah, I went to a beach that charged a dime to go to it! I was just remembering it and I said it outloud. To nobody really, but Mrs. Fluster just happened to be there." The principal looked at him and shook his head. "Now Tony, yesterday you were in here for calling a classmate a 'shucking fithead' and tried to tell me that a fithead is what they call a healthy person who processes oysters. You're not fooling anyone, buddy. You've got to stop this discussphemism or you'll be finding yourself explaining this to your parents while you are on suspension!

Etymology: dis, disrespect + cuss, curse + phemism, from euphemism

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Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: smut-stih-toot

Sentence: Because I work in a kindergarten I maintein a constant cuss diet and will resort to using smutstitute words when I am really gee-golly ticked off at some wing-nut. Though I'd reaally like to tell them to go fudge themselves!!

Etymology: smut + substitute

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COMMENTS:

nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-08: 14:24:00

Perfect! - Tigger, 2008-05-08: 18:57:00

Excellent! - Mustang, 2008-05-08: 19:20:00

Great word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-08: 19:34:00

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: ex-pleh-toot

Sentence: Mommy often had to expletute words around the baby, who was beginning to show an uncanny ability to imitate her speech patterns, especially when she was having a discussion with daddy about golf.

Etymology: expletive: vulgar or coarse word to express emotion + substitute: a replacement

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Created by: WarriorCatGoddess

Pronunciation: More-fit-ing

Sentence: The boy was morfiting at his teacher for giving him an F on his quiz.

Etymology:

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Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [yoo-efuh-miz-uhm]

Sentence: Pristine, soft-spoken and mild, the limits of Molly Mormon's patience had finally expired after Danny overturned a perfume bottle under her desk. "Oh my Heck!" she blurted unable to stop the youeffemisms tumbling out of her mouth. "You little Ess. Just get the Eff out of my class!"

Etymology: A play with the imperative forms of bowdlerized swear words, (which generally are used by naming only the first letter of the offending curse) which sounds like 'euphemism', the substitution of a mild, indirect, or vague expression for one thought to be offensive or harsh.

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: ill-LUDE

Sentence: Shane had a sick sense of humor and even in everyday conversation he'd take every opportunity to use substitute words to illewd to very trashy and disgusting language.

Etymology: blend of ill and lewd, play on the word 'allude'

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COMMENTS:

Shane was lewdicrous! - Nosila, 2009-06-22: 18:13:00

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: (like 'placebo') /pluh-SEE-bohth/

Sentence: Sandra, a mother of three children and a former radio DJ, had trained herself never to swear, but she would often use placeboaths in place of profanity. So, when she yelled at Bobby, "Cheese and Crackers!! Get your gosh darn feet off the coffee table and stop acting like a fudging sugarhead!" nobody thought it was unusual. After all, Bobby really had been acting like a sugarhead.

Etymology: Placebo - a medication prescribed more for the mental relief of the patient than for its actual effect (Latin, placebo "I shall please") + Oath - any profane expression; curse; swearword (from Middle English, ooth "swear" [to a god or diety])

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COMMENTS:

an elegant creation, I must say - stache, 2008-05-08: 08:22:00

very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-08: 14:21:00

Terrific! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-08: 19:37:00

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Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation: pro-f-eye-nn

Sentence: I'm sorry officer but you must have misheard me. If we do go to court I think you will find that 'crucking funt' is a profinity and not a profanity.

Etymology: Turning the profane into the profine was an art form perfected by the French aristocracy in the early years of the republic. They were also helped by atrocious aural hygiene standards during this period of history.

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COMMENTS:

reminds me of the guy on Capitol Steps who tells the stories with initial letters transposed. One concluded thast Haris Pilton simply needed a little soap in her hole; then there was the spale of Elliot Titzler.... - stache, 2008-05-08: 19:02:00

...er, Titzer. You know, the guy wh went to all the hicey prookers? nd I mean hicey. We're not talking bwenty tucks. No, not birty thucks. No, not even borty...never mind. - stache, 2008-05-08: 19:05:00

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Created by: verbherder

Pronunciation: els-swair

Sentence: Howie Mandel always uses vulgarities, but Ed Begley Jr. speaks like a saint. Elseswears come out of his mouth in place of curse words even when he's talking about Mark Harmon and Denzel Washington.

Etymology: else (in some other way) + swear (To use profane oaths; curse)

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: sŭb'tər-fēm'

Sentence: "GOT DANDRUFF, SOMEOFITITCHES!" Grandpa shouted his well-known subterpheme, as he bonked his thumb with the ball-peen hammer for the third time.

Etymology: 'sub,' short for underwater marine vessel, also used to describe an oversized sandwich served on long bread; 'terph,' alt. of turf, locale where one finds one's homies; 'eme,' collapsed form of e-me, avatar used as an on-line representation of oneself.

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