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'Check your lipstick Madge'

DEFINITION: n. A person who habitually looks for love in the all the wrong places and wonders why it always turns out wrong. v. To look for love in the wrong places.

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Verboticisms

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Wooedlousited

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: wood/wooed louse sited

Sentence: Honey Bunny looked on-yon world wide web for love. She searched walla to walla for a sweet one. Vid Alia, turned out to be a gorgin'. Chives was a bit too green. Sal Ad was a bit too red. Maui was a bit too far away. French Fryde turned yellow and ran away. So many were Rap Scallions. Honey Bunny finally realized, looking for love on the endearnet, oops, I mean the interknot, was very wooedlousesited!

Etymology: WOOED, LOUSE is a play on woodlouse. SIGHT/SITE. Wooed - actions taken when looking for love. Louse - undesirable bug, also slang for an undesiraable man. Sight - to use the eyes to look and see. Site - internet locations/domains. ..................... 'on yon' is another way to say onion. Now the following word plays on the names of onions might make better sense.

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COMMENTS:

This week I seem to have a wiled hare ..... everyday. - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:46:00

thyme is a great healer - galwaywegian, 2009-02-11: 04:31:00

I think you're having too much fun with this. :) - kateinkorea, 2009-02-11: 09:40:00

I keep thinking of Easter instead of Valentine's Day - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-11: 10:43:00

Thanks for spicing it up a notch, galwaywegian. You are absolutely right, kateinkorea. Oh, Jabberwocky, so am I! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:26:00

Your story has apeel, oh Lady of Shallot! It made my eyes leek. - Nosila, 2009-02-12: 00:35:00

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Loserchooser

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: lew - sur - chooz - ur

Sentence: Margie was starting to think of herself as a loserchooser. Over and over, she would have a magical evening where she thought she had met the person of her dreams. Pretty quickly she would realize that he was a total loser.

Etymology: Loser + Chooser >> Loser (One that is bad in quality) Chooser (picker: a person who chooses or selects out)

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COMMENTS:

rolls right off the tongue, meaning apparent, memorable, might fine rhymetime verbotomy. - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:39:00

funny! - splendiction, 2009-02-11: 16:01:00

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Romanthick

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: row man thik

Sentence: The romanthick in him knew he would finally meeet his queen as soon as he landed in Africa, maybe even before he got to collect his lottery winnings there!

Etymology: romantic, thick

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Smlugg

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: smlug

Sentence: Shelly, was shmlooking for smlug in all the shmlong places!

Etymology: sssmmm...then a Slug - A lump of metal or glass prepared for further processing. In this case, a s-m-lugg is a person that isn't recognised as a good catch.

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Goodbarista

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gud-barr-ees-ta

Sentence: During her summer vacation, Miss Misty Pristine, tried working as a barista in the local tanning salon cum cafe, Sun Brew. She was so overt in her flirting attempts with the married insurance man who liked his French-pressed with hazelnut or the EMT studying to be a Paramedic who always asked for two shots in his Zippee, the house special. The local college students, making up courses in summer sessions, who loved her HavaJavaMints, called her The Goodbarista.

Etymology: From Looking for Mr. GOODBAR, the story of a young teacher looking for love + BARISTA, a mocha maker

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COMMENTS:

terrific reference - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-11: 10:39:00

Also a well-crafted, very clever sentence - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:45:00

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Loveloined

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: luv loynd

Sentence: Nothing was sadder than Elsie and Bessie,the Bovine Sisters, a pair of loveloined heifers. Their success at attracting true love was terribull...there had been no chance of oxtasy for them. They were always steered in the wrong direction and although they played the field, literally, they were never stampeded by suitors. They decided to join an on-loin dating service on their cowmputers. They only had one beef with this service, it was udderly impossibull to find a young stud who told the truth and did not shoot the bull. These mavericks were always born a "Taurus", owned their own spread and would love to be a fodder. Their names turned out not to be Angus or Delmonico, but Chuck or Stew. Any success the sisters had with this service was strictly oxcidental. When she herd what they had done, their mother had warned them that Internet dating always ended in steers.

Etymology: lovelorn (unhappy in love; suffering from unrequited love) & loin (a cut of meat taken from the side and back of an animal between the ribs and the rump)

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COMMENTS:

Udderly Puntastic! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:26:00

Gives a whole new meaning to beefcake! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:37:00

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Scornicated

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: skôrnikāted

Sentence: After his blind date fell through — some lame excuse about a car accident and coma — Tim decided to see if he could get some action at the new bar in town. As he entered he thought to himself ”My lucky night. Must be lady’s night, the place is full of chicks”. As he made his way around the bar every eye seemed to follow him as well as a mood of disgust. Finally he left the Silver Beaver without scoring but feeling scornicated.

Etymology: scorn (feel or express contempt or derision for) + fornicate (sexual intercourse between non-married partners)

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COMMENTS:

Silver Beaver...Dam! - Nosila, 2010-08-25: 22:08:00

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Paramooer

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: para moo er

Sentence: Elsie was just in the mooed to find a new paramooer. So she went with her bff, Bessie to a meat market...you know the kind of place we mean. Where the goods were well hung, the cowcktails affordabull and there was poll dancing. Their only prospects were a couple of shorthorns who were both Taurus and could be herd from far away. As usual the girls struck out, because the rodeo was in town and the beefcake drank elsewhere.

Etymology: Paramour (a woman's lover;a woman who cohabits with an important man) & Mooer (a cow, who moos)

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COMMENTS:

brilliant! - galwaywegian, 2010-08-25: 04:28:00

I am glad it mooved you! - Nosila, 2010-08-26: 23:48:00

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Chairub

GlobalGallery

Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: chair-ub

Sentence: Cupid's arrow had struck her, right through the heart. From now on there was only one serial killer for her and it was Ivan. His scarred shaven head and crazy eyes made her weak at the knees. She was his chairub and she fought hard to save him from the chair, despite the 11 witnesses who saw his axe wielding escapade. Her scented love letters were the last thing he would read, before his eyeballs boiled and exploded from the 2000 volt current that would pass through his oddly shaped head.

Etymology: 1.cherub - an angelic baby eg Cupid the Roman God of erotic love. 2. chair (electric) - a device used for capital punishment for the most heinous crimes.

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COMMENTS:

Clever! Also plays on RUB, meaning difficulty or dilemma.. - readerwriter, 2009-02-11: 10:30:00

Electtrifying! Shocking! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:41:00

What a sentence! Too bad it couldn't have been commuted...where is that Governor when you need him? - Nosila, 2009-02-14: 23:19:00

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Proflidate

Created by: Negatrev

Pronunciation: Proff-lee-date

Sentence: Dave will never find love while he continues to be proflidate. Sharon realized that proflidating was getting her nowhere.

Etymology: From dating (To go on a date or dates with) and profligate (adj. unrestrained by convention or morality; "Congreve draws a debauched aristocratic society"; "deplorably dissipated and degraded"; "riotous living"; "fast women") AND (noun. someone who dissipates resources self-indulgently or a wasteful person)

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Comments:

silveryaspen - 2009-02-11: 12:33:00
Really enjoyed today's definition, James. It inspired such a remarkable variety of clever verbotomies,

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-02-11: 22:33:00
Thanks Silveryaspen! After reading the words today, it looks like a few of us have fell victim to blunderlust! I guess there is more than a few romanthick libidohnos among us. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-08-25: 00:12:00
Today's definition was suggested by verbotomy. Thank you verbotomy. ~ James