Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kon vik tim ize ashun

Sentence: It was pre-ordained. His name was Rob and by gosh, that is what he did for a living. He also wrote very bad checks. When he was caught and sentenced to 25 years in the pokey, he thought he had fallen prey to convictimization. He was incarcerated at Sing Sing, where contrary to the name, they did not sing, often or well. Warden Gordon Borden thought it would be ironic if Rob wrote the new Prison Newsletter, since he was so good at writing (bad checks). Rob called this literary marvel, "Sentences" and worked hard at it to make it informative and entertaining. He carried regular features, such as a column on advice to the lovelorn..."In-Mates" with such pertinent features as "Are you suffering from Penal Dysfunction?";The Daily Horrorscope ("Your life has settled into predictable routine but just wait, the new screw in Cell Block 4 has his eye on you. Prepare for excitement."); a singles column "Cell-ABC" and recipes from the prison kitchen, "The Garden of Pleadin'" ...for Chili CON carney...take 500 pounds of ground meat, throw in 18 cups of saltpeter,...etc. He also added news items that affected his readership: "Care and feeding of your pet Cockroach"; and he used the digital camera to get candid snaps of daily life column, "I've been framed". Rob became a publishing ty-con and made the most of his pun-nishment!

Etymology: Convict (a person serving a sentence in a jail or prison; a person who has been convicted of a criminal offence; find or declare guilty) & Victimization (adversity resulting from being made a victim; an act that exploits or victimizes someone (treats them unfairly))

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COMMENTS:

written with conviction!! - galwaywegian, 2009-03-06: 05:56:00

Top Notch Job creating this 'con' job and 'con' verbotomy! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:15:00

So funny!!! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-08: 10:30:00

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: nohn sen tensss

Sentence: the judge told the pervert that he would have to wash miss jones' underwear for a year. complete and utter nonsentence

Etymology: sentence, nonsense

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Created by: cdoussett

Pronunciation:

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Created by: Filthy

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology: Aproposterous is a combination of the words apropos and preposterous. The term has largely replaced it's cousin, moronic justice, since it better captures both the disproportional and inappropriate natures of a crime's consequence.

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: pənishmint

Sentence: Edward, the financier had bilked millions from people who had invested in his too-good-to-be-true scheme. The plaintiffs wanted blood. The judge gave him punishmint. Knowing that the defendant loathed the taste of mint — peppermint, spearmint, coolmint, any mint — that was all the candy he was to be allowed for the next 2 years. None of his beloved toffees. Not a single truffle. How he was going to get through it Edward wasn't quite sure. His only consolation was the punishmint he was set to make on his book deal.

Etymology: punishment (the infliction or imposition of a penalty as retribution for an offense) + mint (a peppermint candy)(a vast sum of money)

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COMMENTS:

OMG no mint? How cruel! - wayoffcenter, 2009-03-06: 05:57:00

Amazing that you took such a harsh word and turned into the sweet treat our justice system is handing out! Very Clever! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:21:00

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Created by: tvguard

Pronunciation:

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: nin-juhs-tis

Sentence: Despite the very public nature of his crimes the executive was given a punishment that seemed almost nonexistent. The stealth nature of the judgment caused many to declare it ninjustice. Some, thinking he must have been intoxicated, accused the judge of ginjustice.

Etymology: ninja (a member of a feudal Japanese society of mercenary agents, highly trained in martial arts and stealth) + injustice (violation of the rights of others; unjust or unfair action or treatment)

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Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Miss-cor-tell-lie-za-shun

Sentence: Mr. Ponzi Schemer went to court for his sentencing for committing thousands of felonies and robbing wealthy lil old ladies and retired gentlemen and the rich and infamous. His lawyer Mr. Flippant approached the bench as he stated to the judge that his client's "misscourtalization" was not a just conviction and a true fact that the jury had been too rough on him. So Judge Cramitall over road the jury and ordered defendant Mr. Ponzi Schemer to a lifetime on board a confined luxury yacht out in the Turks & Caicos Islands and to only eat Beluga caviar on toast points and only have Louis Roederer Champagne as his ONLY beverage until...he got sun burned at which time there would be an additional hearing to relocate him.

Etymology: Miss;As in misunderstood. Court;Where you have a legal hearing. A lie;Untruths. Zation;When everything said can and will be twisted around to where it makes no sense and will be used against you...maybe!

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: in - mate - tear - e - all

Sentence: After Barney jaywalked near the general store, Andy meted out a sentence that was inmaterial to the crime. He threw Barney in the slammer for three days....Barney got to see what it was like being an inmate, except that Aunt Bea brought him supper every evening.

Etymology: Inmate + Imaterial >> Inmate (convict: a person serving a sentence in a jail or prison) Imaterial (extraneous: not pertinent to the matter under consideration)

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COMMENTS:

love the Mayberry reference - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-06: 09:39:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: cast/i/va/ca/tion

Sentence: While driving totally blind drunk, Joe hit and killed a senior citizen when he ran a red light. The judge's sentence was, to say the least, a castivacation: four consecutive weekends under house arrest in his own home.

Etymology: CASTIVACATION - noun - from CASTIGATION (to punish in order to correct) + VACATION (a period of suspension of work, study, or other activity, usually used for rest, recreation, or travel; recess, or holiday)

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