Vote for the best verboticism.

'Eat! Or you'll turn into a boneless chicken.'

DEFINITION: n., Cautionary advice provided by parents to their children, often makes no logical sense but carries enough emotional weight to affect the child's behavior. v. To warn of danger through the judicious use of exaggeration.

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Verboticisms

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Mythconduct

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /mith-kon-dukt/

Sentence: Donna stared wistfully at her friends splashing in the pool, and glanced up at the clock again — it'd been only 53 minutes since she'd eaten that banana — seven more minutes before she could go back in the pool. Her mother had warned her many times that going into the water less than an hour after eating would inevitably cause cramps, which were somehow always fatal. 'Would she die from drowning or from the cramps themselves?' she wondered. What if she just dangled her legs in the water? No, it was just too risky. She couldn't overcome the mythconduct her mother had instilled into her. Six minutes and forty five seconds to go...

Etymology: Myth - any invented story, idea, or concept (from Greek, mythos "speech, story") + Conduct - personal behavior; way of acting (from Latin, conductus "to lead or bring together")

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I always doubted this prohibition. I even sent it in to "Mythbusters"....to no avail. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 06:00:00

Well, Mythbusters did prove that you shouldn't spin around in a makeshift wirlpool too soon after eating pizza. Funny episode. But I'm convinced that the 1-hour 'no swimming' rule is nonsense. But I knew kids whose mothers wouldn't even let them stand in the wading pool because of that rule. - Tigger, 2008-08-29: 10:12:00

Good word - TJayzz, 2008-08-29: 13:43:00

Welcome back, Tigger, we mythed you! - Nosila, 2008-08-29: 20:09:00

This one is my favorite, well done! - Rehlit, 2008-09-01: 00:50:00

Good word there Tigger, it has a nice ring to it! I like the way you think :) - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-14: 19:07:00

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Mombombs

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: mom-bomz

Sentence: She had tried chiding. She had tried guilt. Finally Mom went to the scarsenal and started lobbing mombombs. Scientists aren't sure how deep the psychological scars go but, like a black hole, the light of logic rarely escapes from this abyss.

Etymology: Mom (noun: informal, one's mother) + bomb (noun: incendiary material or other destructive substance)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Fire in the hole! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 06:05:00

We usually hid for cover up in the Dadic. - lumina, 2008-08-29: 15:38:00

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Lieperbole

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: līpərbəlē

Sentence: ”If you make a face, it could get stuck that way”, ”Behave because Santa is watching”, ”This is for your own good”. Many parents use lieperbole to keep their children in line.

Etymology: lie (an intentionally false statement) + hyperbole (exaggerated statements or claims not meant to be taken literally)

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COMMENTS:

Very nice. For the win, in my opinion. - mchristof, 2011-06-12: 23:50:00

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Embullshitishment

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: emboŏlshitishmənt

Sentence: Billy grew in a world of embullshitishment. His parents would tell him **Step on a crack and you*ll break your mother*s back**. **Eat your vegetables or the dog will eat your foot**. The world can only wait to see how he will encourage his own children.

Etymology: embellishment (a decorative detail or feature added to something to make it more attractive) + bullshit (stupid or untrue talk or writing; nonsense)

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COMMENTS:

mrskellyscl tee-hee! - mrskellyscl, 2010-01-20: 06:26:00

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Madvice

Created by: lumina

Pronunciation: mad/vice

Sentence: Yeah he was at it again. Dad, flappin' his chops about how he "had to walk a mile to school in the snow," "shine shoes for lunch money" and "wear grandpa's suit jacket to his 8th grade graduation." Patrick learned to tune both Dad AND Mom out the day he realized they were offering nothing but useless madvice once they started digging into their, "WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE" files.

Etymology: mad + advice. Parents short fuse when it comes to their "spoiled brats" whining...

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COMMENTS:

Amen...but of course we do the same things to our own kids...When I was in school, talk about computers was pure science fiction...why they had barely invented tv's or phones that weren't party lines! Cheers,lumina - Nosila, 2008-08-29: 20:08:00

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Humumbug

vixphilia

Created by: vixphilia

Pronunciation: hum-MUM-bug

Sentence: Mum was feding me her usual humumbug: "If you keep making ugly faces,it will freeze like that!"

Etymology: Humbug: pretentious or silly talk Mum: Mother

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Badmonition

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: bad-mo-ni-shun

Sentence: Know for her dark predictions, Grandma offered another of her badmonitions when she told us that eating too much candy would stunt our growth.

Etymology: bad + admonition

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Radmomition

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rad MOM ish in

Sentence: Growing up in an Irish household,the 6 siblings were all raised on a solid diet of good old radmomition. This included an assorted mix of superstitions (spilling salt requires you to throw some over your left shoulder), Aesop's fables(remember that grasshopper and the ant?), lessons from the Bible(Thou shalt not lie about who ate the baking out of the freezer) and old wives' tales(if you tell a lie, your nose will grow), guaranteed to scare even the toughest know-it-all kid into submission. It was never really understood how putting a hat on the bed or opening an umbrella indoors would bring about bad luck; how stepping on a crack could break your mother's back or how licking a frosty metal fence would make your tongue stick to it. (Okay, that on was really true, as one brother found out the hard way)! Yet all these tools were used by their mother to great effectiveness. People marvelled at how well-behaved 6 kids could be out in public. But one look from their Mom's omnipresent eye could nail them to a couch for hours on end, quietly, without a hint of physical persuasion. Santa's elves were watching you just before Christmas time (I mean really, weren't they too busy making toys?); God would be mad to learn you did not put your coins on the offering plate in Church (like does he count it all?)If there was no known adage to affect a situation, she simply would make one up. It was not until they were into their teens that they discovered the Ice Cream Man going around the neighbourhood played his twinkly songs when he still had goodies left to sell. They had always been told that the music was a sign he was sold out. The irony was that all these siblings went through higher education, got responsible jobs and used exactly the same radmomition tactics on their own children and grandchildren...May you be half an hour in Heaven before the Devil knows you're dead!

Etymology: Radical (a person who has out there ideas or opinions;used of opinions and actions far beyond the norm) & Admonition (cautionary advice about something imminent;counsel in terms of someone's behavior;warn strongly; put on guard) & Mom (female parent)& Superstition (an irrational belief arising from ignorance or fear;folklore;omens of good and bad luck)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Oh MAN!!!!...You mean the ice cream man WASN'T sold out? - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 05:56:00

metrohumanx "Mom's omnipresent eye"....great turn of a phrase, Nosette. :) - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 08:11:00

Actual advice from an Alaskan native: Do NOT try to lick the glaciers. - Tigger, 2008-08-29: 10:34:00

Great "sentence!" :) - lumina, 2008-08-29: 15:46:00

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Bullfear

Created by: staggolee

Pronunciation: BULL-Fear

Sentence: Grandma's bullfear haunted the child's imaginings for the rest of his life.

Etymology:

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Rightsense

badthing

Created by: badthing

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-28: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram! ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-01-20: 00:25:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James