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'Eat! Or you'll turn into a boneless chicken.'

DEFINITION: n., Cautionary advice provided by parents to their children, often makes no logical sense but carries enough emotional weight to affect the child's behavior. v. To warn of danger through the judicious use of exaggeration.

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Verboticisms

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Malaproscription

Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈmæləpro(ʊ)ˌskɹɪpʃən/

Sentence: Most new parents promise themselves that they'll always be open and honest with their children, but each time they are asked "Why not?", the probability of the birth of a new malaproscription increases.

Etymology: from malapropism + proscription

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Parenfiction

Created by: PeeJaY

Pronunciation: PAIR-REN-FIK-SHON

Sentence: Alice was adept at providing all sorts of parenfiction to stop here eleven sons from fighting with each other.

Etymology: A conjoining of Parent and Fiction describing the untruths manufactured by desperate parents.

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Improverbs

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: im-prov-erbz

Sentence: my parents kept us in line with a never ending stream of improverbs

Etymology: improv, proverbs

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COMMENTS:

Evcellent! - Scrumpy, 2007-09-28: 07:42:00

Fantastic words- Just what those mischievous imps need! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-30: 18:02:00

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Bullfear

Created by: staggolee

Pronunciation: BULL-Fear

Sentence: Grandma's bullfear haunted the child's imaginings for the rest of his life.

Etymology:

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Radmomition

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rad MOM ish in

Sentence: Growing up in an Irish household,the 6 siblings were all raised on a solid diet of good old radmomition. This included an assorted mix of superstitions (spilling salt requires you to throw some over your left shoulder), Aesop's fables(remember that grasshopper and the ant?), lessons from the Bible(Thou shalt not lie about who ate the baking out of the freezer) and old wives' tales(if you tell a lie, your nose will grow), guaranteed to scare even the toughest know-it-all kid into submission. It was never really understood how putting a hat on the bed or opening an umbrella indoors would bring about bad luck; how stepping on a crack could break your mother's back or how licking a frosty metal fence would make your tongue stick to it. (Okay, that on was really true, as one brother found out the hard way)! Yet all these tools were used by their mother to great effectiveness. People marvelled at how well-behaved 6 kids could be out in public. But one look from their Mom's omnipresent eye could nail them to a couch for hours on end, quietly, without a hint of physical persuasion. Santa's elves were watching you just before Christmas time (I mean really, weren't they too busy making toys?); God would be mad to learn you did not put your coins on the offering plate in Church (like does he count it all?)If there was no known adage to affect a situation, she simply would make one up. It was not until they were into their teens that they discovered the Ice Cream Man going around the neighbourhood played his twinkly songs when he still had goodies left to sell. They had always been told that the music was a sign he was sold out. The irony was that all these siblings went through higher education, got responsible jobs and used exactly the same radmomition tactics on their own children and grandchildren...May you be half an hour in Heaven before the Devil knows you're dead!

Etymology: Radical (a person who has out there ideas or opinions;used of opinions and actions far beyond the norm) & Admonition (cautionary advice about something imminent;counsel in terms of someone's behavior;warn strongly; put on guard) & Mom (female parent)& Superstition (an irrational belief arising from ignorance or fear;folklore;omens of good and bad luck)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Oh MAN!!!!...You mean the ice cream man WASN'T sold out? - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 05:56:00

metrohumanx "Mom's omnipresent eye"....great turn of a phrase, Nosette. :) - metrohumanx, 2008-08-29: 08:11:00

Actual advice from an Alaskan native: Do NOT try to lick the glaciers. - Tigger, 2008-08-29: 10:34:00

Great "sentence!" :) - lumina, 2008-08-29: 15:46:00

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Awedition

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: aw/dish/un

Sentence: Parents awedition their children because it is a fast, easy way to get the behaviour they expect. Unfortunately, when children are put through too many aweditions and are older, they do not trust anything their parents tell them.

Etymology: awe (fear)+ condition

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COMMENTS:

sounds like something a teacher might do - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-28: 11:59:00

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Lieperbole

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: līpərbəlē

Sentence: ”If you make a face, it could get stuck that way”, ”Behave because Santa is watching”, ”This is for your own good”. Many parents use lieperbole to keep their children in line.

Etymology: lie (an intentionally false statement) + hyperbole (exaggerated statements or claims not meant to be taken literally)

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COMMENTS:

Very nice. For the win, in my opinion. - mchristof, 2011-06-12: 23:50:00

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Dadvice

Created by: dwight

Pronunciation: dad-vice

Sentence: "The dadvice was smokin' yesterday when he found out I had unprotected sex with my English teacher."

Etymology: Dad and advice

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COMMENTS:

vixphilia Oooh, catchy! Very good! - vixphilia, 2007-09-28: 16:56:00

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Veilacide

Created by: Rhyme79

Pronunciation: vale-uh-syde

Sentence: My dad was really good at veilacide when we were kids. He had us believing all sorts of things that we now know are utter piffle. For example, he told us that if we didn't brush our teeth they would fall out and fly away to find an old person that needed them! For a while I actually believed that eating my crusts would give me curly hair, so I didn't eat them because I wanted straight hair!

Etymology: An anagram of lie-advice. Veil, ( to cover or conceal, a pretense)+ cide, (latin - killer or the act of killing, in this case 'the truth'!)+ the left over 'a' in the middle = veilacide.

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COMMENTS:

DrWebsterIII funny story - DrWebsterIII, 2012-11-03: 04:55:00

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Yolklaw

Created by: wordslikevenom

Pronunciation: Yolk-law

Sentence: "Cluck, cluck, cluck", mother was laying down the yolklaw yet again.

Etymology: Yolk - middle part of an egg. Law - a rule or the whole system of such rules.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-28: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram! ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-01-20: 00:25:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James