Verboticisms

Created by: Discoveria

Pronunciation: imm-PED-lur

Sentence: The impeddler was so obnoxious that I stormed out of the shop, accidentally breaking some cheap plastic products on my way out.

Etymology: impede (to obstruct or hinder) + peddler (a travelling seller of goods)

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Created by: cohenarie

Pronunciation:

Sentence: The obnoxiously obsequious sellcubus cleaved to me the moment I entered the store, offering a pitch on each item I browsed.

Etymology: sell + succubus (or incubus)

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Created by: Clayton

Pronunciation: huh-RAS-hat

Sentence: As she made her way to the front of the bookstore, Gilda was cornered by resident harasshat Caleb, who wasted at least five minutes of her day calmly reassuring her that he'd been reading Baudrillard.

Etymology: harass + asshat

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COMMENTS:

love it love it love it - iwasatripwire, 2007-05-16: 12:37:00

I really need to start using this one, because I seem to run into a few each day. - Clayton, 2007-05-16: 14:49:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: oh-ver-lawd

Sentence: According to the clerk at the grocery everything in the store is simply wonderful. He seems able to overlaud just about anything he touches. Strangely, I only see him shopping at the up-grade store up the street.

Etymology: overload (to load to excess; overburden) laud (to praise; extol)

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: merch - hunt - izer

Sentence: Stanley was a Sears merchuntiser. Once he saw a potential customer, he tailed them throughout the store waving his arms and talking about the benefits and low cost of every item the customer walked past. Sometimes people bought things just to get rid of him.

Etymology: merchandiser, hunter

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: sīrəˈnād

Sentence: Melody is a wonderful salesperson. Even her detractors have to admit she is hard to resist. Once she starts her sirenade, the sale is all but final. The first verse usually starts with **How may I help You Today?** The final chorus... **Come see us again**. Her song can be soothing, flirting, or annoying but always unrelenting. Anyone who wanders too close buys something. A customer once tried to return an ugly green sweater and returned home with two sweaters, one blue and one yellow. **Blue and yellow make green** made sense when Melody said it.

Etymology: siren (Greek Mythology each of a number of women or winged creatures whose singing lured unwary sailors onto rocks) + serenade (a piece of music sung or played in the open air, typically by a man at night under the window of his lover)

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: shopper-block-it

Sentence: I was mad keen to cash in my coupon for the low-rise, stretch, stonewash, studded, stovepipe legged jeans at half-price, but when I reached the store I cowered in the doorway before the salesresistant. There was Ursula, a shopperblockit par excellence with her stentorian voice and sergeant-major mannerisms bearing down on me.

Etymology: shopper docket (sales promotions printed on the back of receipts) + block (obstruct/hinder)

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Created by: duchessella

Pronunciation: STOCK-kee-per

Sentence: Diminished self-awareness, no sense of humiliation and unfaltering persistence are the most important virtues in a successful stalkeeper.

Etymology: Stalker + Shopkeeper. Because I ALWAYS feel really disturbed by stalkeepers, like they're obtrusing my personal space, stalking me inside a shop, following me everywhere (in the 40 sq. ft. shop) and trying to press me to buy everything I don't need. Argh

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Created by: Scattercat

Pronunciation: sehr-VILL-en

Sentence: I've never been so annoyed in my life! That servillain has ruined that store for me forever.

Etymology: Servile means behaving in a fawning, obsequious manner. A villain is one who performs evil acts. Driving away potential customers through misguided devotion to the sanctity of the store seems an adequate summary of those two traits combined.

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Created by: Guthlaf1

Pronunciation: komm-ISS-tant

Sentence: I hadn't been in the shop ten seconds before the young commistant started making my day miserable.

Etymology: From: commission + (sales) assistant

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