Verboticisms

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: sīrəˈnād

Sentence: Melody is a wonderful salesperson. Even her detractors have to admit she is hard to resist. Once she starts her sirenade, the sale is all but final. The first verse usually starts with **How may I help You Today?** The final chorus... **Come see us again**. Her song can be soothing, flirting, or annoying but always unrelenting. Anyone who wanders too close buys something. A customer once tried to return an ugly green sweater and returned home with two sweaters, one blue and one yellow. **Blue and yellow make green** made sense when Melody said it.

Etymology: siren (Greek Mythology each of a number of women or winged creatures whose singing lured unwary sailors onto rocks) + serenade (a piece of music sung or played in the open air, typically by a man at night under the window of his lover)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: oh-ver-lawd

Sentence: According to the clerk at the grocery everything in the store is simply wonderful. He seems able to overlaud just about anything he touches. Strangely, I only see him shopping at the up-grade store up the street.

Etymology: overload (to load to excess; overburden) laud (to praise; extol)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: o ver selz us

Sentence: The guy was everywhere. We were grocery shopping, in the produce aisle, when this geeky associate thrusts a box of strawberries at us and says, "Try these, they're berry nice!" We demer, but he's back 2 minutes later with green onions, saying, "Repeat after me, I'm the Italian Scallion!" He then shows us a potato ("Don't his eyes have a peel?") and a husk of corn ("Meet the kernel, he's all ears.") Finally, "Orange you as glad as I yam that you decided to turnip in my department?" and finally, "It's bean great to "C" you, you're hard to beet!" "Do you wanna date?"... At that point, I snapped and said, "Lettuce see what your Store Manager has to say about your oversellsus behavior!" To which the Store Manager replied, "Don't worry about Romaine, cos he's just trying to get a head. When he's not taking a leek here, he goes to comedy school as a caper. He wants to earn a higher celery and get a plum job. I just can't squash his dreams!"

Etymology: Overzealous (marked by excessive enthusiasm for and intense devotion to a cause or idea) & Over (too much) & Sells Us (persuade somebody to accept something; do business; offer for sale as for one's livelihood;deliver to an enemy by treachery)

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COMMENTS:

overclever! - mweinmann, 2009-12-01: 07:50:00

nice - galwaywegian, 2009-12-01: 09:48:00

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Created by: whipspeak

Pronunciation: geh-stah-poh

Sentence: The dealership was crawling with Guestopo and I had to get out of there before I was spotted. They have ways of making you buy.

Etymology: Gestapo: the German state secret police during the Nazi regime + Guest: visitor or patron + stop: to interrupt, arrest, or check

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /əˈfɛnˈsɛlɚ/

Sentence: Sadly, for every person who is pushed out of the store by an offenseller, there are two more who are convinced to buy something that they wouldn't have otherwise.

Etymology: From offensive + seller

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COMMENTS:

I voted already, but I like this one. An offenseller seems like an instoramus. - Clayton, 2007-05-16: 19:55:00

Thanks. I seem to get that a lot if I decide to go to bed before 1 or 2am and end up making up my words the next morning. - ErWenn, 2007-05-16: 22:38:00

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Created by: jonobo

Pronunciation: "push" like in push + "inator" like in terminator.

Sentence: At first sight i thought he would just be an average standard legal pusher, then i had to realise that he was at least one of those new powerpusher models, but when i tried to leave the shop he showed his real potential and i finally came to the only rational conclusion left: he was the Pushinator.

Etymology: Pusher + Terminator = Pushinator.

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Created by: katytee

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Tired of being trailed round the store by counterassistants, Ed resolved from that moment to do all his shopping online in his underwear and eating pizza , free to scratch himself and 'look a bit too scruffy for Jenners' to his heart's content.

Etymology: Someone offering counter-productive assistance (Counter + assistance, with a nod in the direction of persistent)

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COMMENTS:

It rolls from the tongue lightly... - Scattercat, 2007-05-20: 19:34:00

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Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: ann-tee-shawp-pest

Sentence: If Rudy saw any antishoppests around he would hide in the changeroom until the coast was clear.

Etymology: anti-shop-pest

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Created by: daisy

Pronunciation: ree-tail-i-ton

Sentence: The retailiton followed us around the circle K as if we were going to steal something.

Etymology:

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: floor/stalk/er

Sentence: Commissioned salespeople are licensed floorstalkers who creep me out of the store.

Etymology: floorwalker + stalker

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COMMENTS:

We have a winner! - Clayton, 2007-05-16: 14:57:00

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