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'Nothing clever to say?'

DEFINITION: n. A clever remark, especially a "comeback line" to an insult, which does not come to mind until it is too late to be delivered; often leads to the gnashing of teeth. v. To think of something clever after it's too late.

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Verboticisms

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Retorture

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ree tort chur

Sentence: Drew always became tongue-tied after the tart-tongued Ramona passed him by at school and made one of her blistering comments to him. It was only after she departed that he would think of something clever in return. This retorture replayed like a video in his head all night. He was so busy trying to be the witty racontuer that he failed to realize that she only did this to get his attention because she liked him.

Etymology: Retort (a quick reply to a question or remark (especially a witty or critical one)& Torture (torment emotionally or mentally;the act of distorting something so it seems to mean something it was not intended to mean)

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Delaverbovery

Created by: Jaxies

Pronunciation: /duh-luh-vurb-of-eree/

Sentence: "It was only five hours later that Chris thought of the perfect comeback to Andy's snide remark that 'you couldn't shag a sheep if you tried'. A perfect case of delaverbovery."

Etymology: Delay + verb + recovery

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Retord

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: ree-tord

Sentence: My clever retord about his ass being listed as a major source of global warming did not come to me until long after it could be effectively delivered.

Etymology: retort, retard

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COMMENTS:

I reckon this one is better than "retortoise" because the tortoise kicked the hair's major source of a problem the American government denies exists. - Bulletchewer, 2007-04-03: 17:35:00

*hare Duh! - Bulletchewer, 2007-04-03: 17:35:00

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Verbotomissed

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: ver bott ommm ist

Sentence: He verbotomissed madly as she strutted into the dissedance

Etymology: vertobotomy, missed

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COMMENTS:

Verbotombest! - Nosila, 2009-10-21: 01:23:00

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Gigglelag

Created by: Sed8ed

Pronunciation: gig-el-lag

Sentence: Gigglelag was a familiar state of affairs for Mark, who always found himself tongue-tied (?) until well after the argument was over.

Etymology: giggle + lag = gigglelag

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Tardytort

Created by: PythianHabenero

Pronunciation: tar-dee-tort

Sentence: A half hour after being wittily insulted, Andrew came up with the best tardytort he'd ever heard.

Etymology: "tardy" as in late and "retort" as in comeback.

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Numback

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: nəmbak

Sentence: She cut him to the quick with her biting remark. All he had was a numback. Like the line from the Three Stooges, ”I’m trying to think but nothing happens”, He’s trying to speak but nothing happens.

Etymology: numb (deprive of feeling or responsiveness) + comeback (a quick reply to a critical remark)

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Lateslate

Created by: Discoveria

Pronunciation: layte-slayte

Sentence: My lateslate "No, your mother's a gas-guzzling user-unfriendly air polluter!" came to me only three minutes later - when the damage had already been dished out.

Etymology: Late + slate (to insult)

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Disslate

arlouxo

Created by: arlouxo

Pronunciation: diss/lay/te

Sentence: "UGH! I disslated again Sophie!" "That is the best disslate I ever thought of!"

Etymology: Diss ("comeback line" to insult back someone) & Late

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Retortoise

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: re-tor-tus

Sentence: Finally, at 2am , he thought of a retortoise

Etymology: retort, tortoise

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COMMENTS:

petaj another excellent one. I expect you may get a few comments that are retortoises - but they won't be posted for a few days :-) - petaj, 2007-04-03: 03:56:00

Sublime - pinwheel, 2007-04-03: 03:58:00

retortuous! - galwaywegian, 2007-04-03: 05:16:00

dang! I must arise earlier! - Alchemist, 2007-04-03: 05:41:00

fantasic - imcvey, 2007-04-03: 05:48:00

hareraisingly funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-04-03: 08:45:00

erasmus damn thats too good. - erasmus, 2007-04-03: 09:27:00

I thought of that too, but not until 3:30am... - wordmeister, 2007-04-03: 10:04:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian.
Thank you mplsbohemian! ~ James

mplsbohemian - 2007-04-03: 11:13:00
Thanks for using the definition! I specifically chose it because the French expression for this is notoriously difficult to succinctly translate into English. Perhaps you guys can help! Peace Clint

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 11:45:00
Ah oui, "l'ésprit de l'escalier"... Merci pour la suggestion, mplsbohemian ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-10-20: 03:48:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian. Thank you mplsbohemian. ~ James