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'Nothing clever to say?'

DEFINITION: n. A clever remark, especially a "comeback line" to an insult, which does not come to mind until it is too late to be delivered; often leads to the gnashing of teeth. v. To think of something clever after it's too late.

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Verboticisms

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Waiticism

Created by: urbanwookie

Pronunciation: way-tiss-ism

Sentence: As he smashed the last plate in the restaurant, Chris suddenly discovered the waiticism he had needed to parry the waiter's razor-sharp repartee...

Etymology: wait -> witticism

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COMMENTS:

nicely weighted! - galwaywegian, 2007-04-03: 05:18:00

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Badinaggro

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: bad-in-ar-gro

Sentence: Bob's OCD had led to him writing down all his badinaggros, creating a perpetual reminder of his inadequacy at repartee. Even worse were the badinagesaggro - remarks that he thought up at least a month after the insult.

Etymology: badinage (playful banter) + ago (in time past) + aggro (colloq. aggravation)

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Numback

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: nəmbak

Sentence: She cut him to the quick with her biting remark. All he had was a numback. Like the line from the Three Stooges, ”I’m trying to think but nothing happens”, He’s trying to speak but nothing happens.

Etymology: numb (deprive of feeling or responsiveness) + comeback (a quick reply to a critical remark)

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Ifonlyism

Created by: imcvey

Pronunciation: if-only-ism

Sentence: That ifonlyism would have floored her.

Etymology:

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Tortard

zrotv

Created by: zrotv

Pronunciation: tōr'tärd

Sentence: Her insult was witty and cutting. I dug deep in my repertoire for an equally eloquent response, not wanting to defer to simple comments about her mother. Finally it came and I released it to the now distant and distancing back of her head. My lack of haste had resulted in the ever embarrassing tortardation. My weak totard fizzled on absent ears. Why, oh why, was I doomed to tortardation?! (slang, pejorative, adj.: retortarded)

Etymology: retort (To reply, especially to answer in a quick, caustic, or witty manner) + retard / tard (To be delayed. Latin retardāre : re- + tardāre, to delay (from tardus, slow))

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Lollyjesting

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: lälējesting

Sentence: Harry*s repartee could use some tuning. He can generally think of something witty to say in response to another*s comment but his timing is a little off. His sexual innuendo was far less effective and just a little creepy once the group*s conversation had shifted from girlfriends to in-laws. His lollyjesting will often garner a responce of **Huh?**.

Etymology: lollygag (spend time aimlessly; idle) + jesting (a thing said or done for amusement; a joke)

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Retord

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: ree-tord

Sentence: My clever retord about his ass being listed as a major source of global warming did not come to me until long after it could be effectively delivered.

Etymology: retort, retard

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COMMENTS:

I reckon this one is better than "retortoise" because the tortoise kicked the hair's major source of a problem the American government denies exists. - Bulletchewer, 2007-04-03: 17:35:00

*hare Duh! - Bulletchewer, 2007-04-03: 17:35:00

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Retortoise

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: re-tor-tus

Sentence: Finally, at 2am , he thought of a retortoise

Etymology: retort, tortoise

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COMMENTS:

petaj another excellent one. I expect you may get a few comments that are retortoises - but they won't be posted for a few days :-) - petaj, 2007-04-03: 03:56:00

Sublime - pinwheel, 2007-04-03: 03:58:00

retortuous! - galwaywegian, 2007-04-03: 05:16:00

dang! I must arise earlier! - Alchemist, 2007-04-03: 05:41:00

fantasic - imcvey, 2007-04-03: 05:48:00

hareraisingly funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-04-03: 08:45:00

erasmus damn thats too good. - erasmus, 2007-04-03: 09:27:00

I thought of that too, but not until 3:30am... - wordmeister, 2007-04-03: 10:04:00

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Dissafter

Created by: Bulletchewer

Pronunciation: diss-aff-ter

Sentence: Dolly had already left the room before Molly had thought of the perfect dissafter; that she was like so whatever...

Etymology: From "diss" meaning "disrespect", "after" and "disaster".

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COMMENTS:

petaj nice word - petaj, 2007-04-03: 03:48:00

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Retart

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: re tart

Sentence: When the Drag Queen sauntered past Drew and asked him what he was looking at, he was dumbstruck. Of course, once he/she was long gone, his retart finally kicked in and he said, "You've got big hands!". He Drew his own conclusions...

Etymology: Retard ( be delayed;slow to develop)& Retort (a quick reply to a question or remark (especially a witty or critical one)

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COMMENTS:

Kind of demeaning to use the R-word. - Koekbroer, 2012-08-02: 00:03:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian.
Thank you mplsbohemian! ~ James

mplsbohemian - 2007-04-03: 11:13:00
Thanks for using the definition! I specifically chose it because the French expression for this is notoriously difficult to succinctly translate into English. Perhaps you guys can help! Peace Clint

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 11:45:00
Ah oui, "l'ésprit de l'escalier"... Merci pour la suggestion, mplsbohemian ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-10-20: 03:48:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian. Thank you mplsbohemian. ~ James