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'Nothing clever to say?'

DEFINITION: n. A clever remark, especially a "comeback line" to an insult, which does not come to mind until it is too late to be delivered; often leads to the gnashing of teeth. v. To think of something clever after it's too late.

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Verboticisms

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Retortoise

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: re-tor-tus

Sentence: Finally, at 2am , he thought of a retortoise

Etymology: retort, tortoise

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COMMENTS:

petaj another excellent one. I expect you may get a few comments that are retortoises - but they won't be posted for a few days :-) - petaj, 2007-04-03: 03:56:00

Sublime - pinwheel, 2007-04-03: 03:58:00

retortuous! - galwaywegian, 2007-04-03: 05:16:00

dang! I must arise earlier! - Alchemist, 2007-04-03: 05:41:00

fantasic - imcvey, 2007-04-03: 05:48:00

hareraisingly funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-04-03: 08:45:00

erasmus damn thats too good. - erasmus, 2007-04-03: 09:27:00

I thought of that too, but not until 3:30am... - wordmeister, 2007-04-03: 10:04:00

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Hindsightjibe

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hynde syte jybe

Sentence: Drew was famous for his hindsightjibes. When that snotty drag queen walked passed him and told Drew his fly was down (well, she actually said that he had left the garage door open on his dinky car)...he got tongue-tied and froze up(and not just because he had left that door open). Upon reflection, he should have yelled at her that the back of her dress was tucked into the top of her panty hose and a big long piece of arsewipe was stuck to the heel of her stilettos. But then he thought that he would just leave it to cleavage...

Etymology: Hindsight (understanding the nature of an event after it has happened) & Jibe (an aggressive remark directed at a person like a missile and intended to have a telling effect)

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Retord

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: ree-tord

Sentence: My clever retord about his ass being listed as a major source of global warming did not come to me until long after it could be effectively delivered.

Etymology: retort, retard

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COMMENTS:

I reckon this one is better than "retortoise" because the tortoise kicked the hair's major source of a problem the American government denies exists. - Bulletchewer, 2007-04-03: 17:35:00

*hare Duh! - Bulletchewer, 2007-04-03: 17:35:00

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Rejoinduh

CharlieB

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: re-join-der

Sentence: Bill's witty riposte to his annoying colleagues came too late. He'd fallen into the humiliating trap of failing to think of a witticism, only a rejoinduh.

Etymology: rejoinder (a reply, a riposte) + uh! (an exclamation used to indicate doubt or hesitation)

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Tardytort

Created by: PythianHabenero

Pronunciation: tar-dee-tort

Sentence: A half hour after being wittily insulted, Andrew came up with the best tardytort he'd ever heard.

Etymology: "tardy" as in late and "retort" as in comeback.

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Substingstuff

Created by: ajcor

Pronunciation: substingstuff

Sentence: she devastated him with her oneliner about his mono brow but this time he was ready for the cruel witticism and was able to substingstuff right back at her.

Etymology: subsequent to+clever, smart, sting+remark,statement,content,stuff.

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Dissafter

Created by: Bulletchewer

Pronunciation: diss-aff-ter

Sentence: Dolly had already left the room before Molly had thought of the perfect dissafter; that she was like so whatever...

Etymology: From "diss" meaning "disrespect", "after" and "disaster".

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COMMENTS:

petaj nice word - petaj, 2007-04-03: 03:48:00

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Retorture

Created by: Erikv

Pronunciation: re tort chur

Sentence: He knew he thought of a gem with the "jerk store" line but she was gone and he was left with retorture.

Etymology: Combination of retort and torture

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Wittischism

Created by: pinwheel

Pronunciation: wit/i/skiz/um

Sentence: John's wittischism was particularly acute as he replayed the argument in his mind three hours after the event.

Etymology: witticism (a clever remark) + schism (a division or break - in this case the break between the desire to retort and the actual thinking of the retort.

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COMMENTS:

a clever cut... - ajcor, 2007-04-03: 18:00:00

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Retrozinger

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: REH-tro-zyng-ir

Sentence: Several minutes after being Zapped with a major insult by Miriam, Leonard thought of a great comeback and wished he could go back and whack her with a retrozinger, convinced he would then be a 'winner'.

Etymology: Blend of 'retro' (prefix meaning 'backward : back') and 'zinger' (n. something causing or meant to cause interest, surprise, or shock)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian.
Thank you mplsbohemian! ~ James

mplsbohemian - 2007-04-03: 11:13:00
Thanks for using the definition! I specifically chose it because the French expression for this is notoriously difficult to succinctly translate into English. Perhaps you guys can help! Peace Clint

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 11:45:00
Ah oui, "l'ésprit de l'escalier"... Merci pour la suggestion, mplsbohemian ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-10-20: 03:48:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian. Thank you mplsbohemian. ~ James