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'Nothing clever to say?'

DEFINITION: n. A clever remark, especially a "comeback line" to an insult, which does not come to mind until it is too late to be delivered; often leads to the gnashing of teeth. v. To think of something clever after it's too late.

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Delaverbovery

Created by: Jaxies

Pronunciation: /duh-luh-vurb-of-eree/

Sentence: "It was only five hours later that Chris thought of the perfect comeback to Andy's snide remark that 'you couldn't shag a sheep if you tried'. A perfect case of delaverbovery."

Etymology: Delay + verb + recovery

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Retorture

Created by: Erikv

Pronunciation: re tort chur

Sentence: He knew he thought of a gem with the "jerk store" line but she was gone and he was left with retorture.

Etymology: Combination of retort and torture

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Numback

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: nəmbak

Sentence: She cut him to the quick with her biting remark. All he had was a numback. Like the line from the Three Stooges, ”I’m trying to think but nothing happens”, He’s trying to speak but nothing happens.

Etymology: numb (deprive of feeling or responsiveness) + comeback (a quick reply to a critical remark)

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Tortard

zrotv

Created by: zrotv

Pronunciation: tōr'tärd

Sentence: Her insult was witty and cutting. I dug deep in my repertoire for an equally eloquent response, not wanting to defer to simple comments about her mother. Finally it came and I released it to the now distant and distancing back of her head. My lack of haste had resulted in the ever embarrassing tortardation. My weak totard fizzled on absent ears. Why, oh why, was I doomed to tortardation?! (slang, pejorative, adj.: retortarded)

Etymology: retort (To reply, especially to answer in a quick, caustic, or witty manner) + retard / tard (To be delayed. Latin retardāre : re- + tardāre, to delay (from tardus, slow))

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Latealine

Created by: Dolraith

Pronunciation: Late-a-line

Sentence: The next day I had a latealine to her remark...

Etymology:

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Shouldasaiditis

Created by: Osomatic

Pronunciation: should + ah + said + itis

Sentence: I always end up with shouldasaiditis when I think of an awesome retort 5 minutes later.

Etymology: should have said + itis

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COMMENTS:

Gotta hand it to the -itis suffix again. - Bulletchewer, 2007-04-03: 17:30:00

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Retorture

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ree tort chur

Sentence: Drew always became tongue-tied after the tart-tongued Ramona passed him by at school and made one of her blistering comments to him. It was only after she departed that he would think of something clever in return. This retorture replayed like a video in his head all night. He was so busy trying to be the witty racontuer that he failed to realize that she only did this to get his attention because she liked him.

Etymology: Retort (a quick reply to a question or remark (especially a witty or critical one)& Torture (torment emotionally or mentally;the act of distorting something so it seems to mean something it was not intended to mean)

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Requipmentfailure

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: ree/quip/ment/fayl/ur

Sentence: He was constantly plagued by requipmentfailure.

Etymology: re (regarding) + equipment failure + quip

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Postrip

Created by: Alchemist

Pronunciation: POHST-rip

Sentence: As usual, Jimmy thought of a perfect postrip 2 days after Jeanine called him a lackwit: "I know you are, but what am I?"

Etymology: postscript, post (after), rip (as in to rip on someone verbally).

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Retortoise

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: re-tor-tus

Sentence: Finally, at 2am , he thought of a retortoise

Etymology: retort, tortoise

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COMMENTS:

petaj another excellent one. I expect you may get a few comments that are retortoises - but they won't be posted for a few days :-) - petaj, 2007-04-03: 03:56:00

Sublime - pinwheel, 2007-04-03: 03:58:00

retortuous! - galwaywegian, 2007-04-03: 05:16:00

dang! I must arise earlier! - Alchemist, 2007-04-03: 05:41:00

fantasic - imcvey, 2007-04-03: 05:48:00

hareraisingly funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-04-03: 08:45:00

erasmus damn thats too good. - erasmus, 2007-04-03: 09:27:00

I thought of that too, but not until 3:30am... - wordmeister, 2007-04-03: 10:04:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian.
Thank you mplsbohemian! ~ James

mplsbohemian - 2007-04-03: 11:13:00
Thanks for using the definition! I specifically chose it because the French expression for this is notoriously difficult to succinctly translate into English. Perhaps you guys can help! Peace Clint

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 11:45:00
Ah oui, "l'ésprit de l'escalier"... Merci pour la suggestion, mplsbohemian ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-10-20: 03:48:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian. Thank you mplsbohemian. ~ James