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'Nothing clever to say?'

DEFINITION: n. A clever remark, especially a "comeback line" to an insult, which does not come to mind until it is too late to be delivered; often leads to the gnashing of teeth. v. To think of something clever after it's too late.

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Verboticisms

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Retorture

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ree tort chur

Sentence: Drew always became tongue-tied after the tart-tongued Ramona passed him by at school and made one of her blistering comments to him. It was only after she departed that he would think of something clever in return. This retorture replayed like a video in his head all night. He was so busy trying to be the witty racontuer that he failed to realize that she only did this to get his attention because she liked him.

Etymology: Retort (a quick reply to a question or remark (especially a witty or critical one)& Torture (torment emotionally or mentally;the act of distorting something so it seems to mean something it was not intended to mean)

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Retortoise

karenanne

Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: re TOR tus

Sentence: "Oh yeah? I'm a b----? Well, uh, uh, I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter!" she retortoised, as he disappeared from view.

Etymology: retort + tortoise

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Rejoinduh

CharlieB

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: re-join-der

Sentence: Bill's witty riposte to his annoying colleagues came too late. He'd fallen into the humiliating trap of failing to think of a witticism, only a rejoinduh.

Etymology: rejoinder (a reply, a riposte) + uh! (an exclamation used to indicate doubt or hesitation)

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Wittischism

Created by: pinwheel

Pronunciation: wit/i/skiz/um

Sentence: John's wittischism was particularly acute as he replayed the argument in his mind three hours after the event.

Etymology: witticism (a clever remark) + schism (a division or break - in this case the break between the desire to retort and the actual thinking of the retort.

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COMMENTS:

a clever cut... - ajcor, 2007-04-03: 18:00:00

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Waiticism

Created by: urbanwookie

Pronunciation: way-tiss-ism

Sentence: As he smashed the last plate in the restaurant, Chris suddenly discovered the waiticism he had needed to parry the waiter's razor-sharp repartee...

Etymology: wait -> witticism

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COMMENTS:

nicely weighted! - galwaywegian, 2007-04-03: 05:18:00

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Tortard

zrotv

Created by: zrotv

Pronunciation: tōr'tärd

Sentence: Her insult was witty and cutting. I dug deep in my repertoire for an equally eloquent response, not wanting to defer to simple comments about her mother. Finally it came and I released it to the now distant and distancing back of her head. My lack of haste had resulted in the ever embarrassing tortardation. My weak totard fizzled on absent ears. Why, oh why, was I doomed to tortardation?! (slang, pejorative, adj.: retortarded)

Etymology: retort (To reply, especially to answer in a quick, caustic, or witty manner) + retard / tard (To be delayed. Latin retardāre : re- + tardāre, to delay (from tardus, slow))

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Retortoise

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: re-tor-tus

Sentence: Finally, at 2am , he thought of a retortoise

Etymology: retort, tortoise

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COMMENTS:

petaj another excellent one. I expect you may get a few comments that are retortoises - but they won't be posted for a few days :-) - petaj, 2007-04-03: 03:56:00

Sublime - pinwheel, 2007-04-03: 03:58:00

retortuous! - galwaywegian, 2007-04-03: 05:16:00

dang! I must arise earlier! - Alchemist, 2007-04-03: 05:41:00

fantasic - imcvey, 2007-04-03: 05:48:00

hareraisingly funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-04-03: 08:45:00

erasmus damn thats too good. - erasmus, 2007-04-03: 09:27:00

I thought of that too, but not until 3:30am... - wordmeister, 2007-04-03: 10:04:00

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Comeslack

Created by: ziggy41

Pronunciation: (KUHM-slak)

Sentence: He sat in dismay as he had created a perfect comeslack to her nasty remark an hour ago.

Etymology: From "comeback" (a retaliation remark) and "slack" (slow or sluggish).

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COMMENTS:

What every woman wants? - Bulletchewer, 2007-04-03: 17:30:00

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Unaquipvent

Created by: suzanne

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Postrip

Created by: Alchemist

Pronunciation: POHST-rip

Sentence: As usual, Jimmy thought of a perfect postrip 2 days after Jeanine called him a lackwit: "I know you are, but what am I?"

Etymology: postscript, post (after), rip (as in to rip on someone verbally).

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian.
Thank you mplsbohemian! ~ James

mplsbohemian - 2007-04-03: 11:13:00
Thanks for using the definition! I specifically chose it because the French expression for this is notoriously difficult to succinctly translate into English. Perhaps you guys can help! Peace Clint

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-04-03: 11:45:00
Ah oui, "l'ésprit de l'escalier"... Merci pour la suggestion, mplsbohemian ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-10-20: 03:48:00
Today's definition was suggested by mplsbohemian. Thank you mplsbohemian. ~ James