Verboticisms

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: owch poe tay toe

Sentence: the unfortunate juxtaposition of the remote control between cushions and the couchpotatos descending butt transformed him to an ouchpotato.

Etymology: couch potato, ouch

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kôfrakchərd

Sentence: Jimmy doesn’t really want to talk about his latest injury. Apparently he is embarrassed that he coughractured his finger while picking his nose.

Etymology: cough (expel air from the lungs with a sudden sharp sound) + fratcured (the cracking or breaking of a hard object or material)

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: inn sull twin jerr eee

Sentence: Her latest insultwinjury occurred due to her using tweezers while driving. it gave new meaning to "keeping an eye on the road"

Etymology: insult to injury.

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COMMENTS:

great twist - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-15: 10:51:00

It's like when you put mascara on while driving...or so I'm told...good one. - Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:56:00

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Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: ax-e-dumb

Sentence: After tying my shoes, I stood up too fast and got an accidumb as my leg cramped up.

Etymology: accident+dumb

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: mort - iff - im - payrd

Sentence: Morton was completely mortifimpaired, suffering both injury and embarrassment at his being wheelchair bound thru an injury acquired during foolish horseplay.

Etymology: Blend of mortified and impaired.

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: ouch-puh-tey-toh

Sentence: A sedentary lifestyle with a certain level of atrophy have left Roger an ouchpotato.

Etymology: ouch (interjection used to express pain) + couch potato (a lazy person whose recreation consists chiefly of watching television and videos)

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: dor/mi/dent

Sentence: Last week I went to bed perfectly normal, but sometime during the night I had a dormident and woke up with severe back pains and it took me fifteen minutes to get out of bed.

Etymology: dormant + accident (an unfortunate event in the act of doing something)- dormident (an unfortunate event in the act of doing nothing)

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: in/jur/sheea

Sentence: Mark suffered from chronic injurtia. He often injured himself surfing the internet or changing stations on the remote.

Etymology: injure + inertia

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: harm ill ee ate

Sentence: Stanley felt like he was born with a large "L" for Loser on his forehead. No one could harmiliate themself the way he could. He had lost every job he had ever worked at and injured himself over and over in the process. Like the time he got 3rd degree burns working at a fast food place, bobbing for French fries. Or the time he crashed his taxi cab by backing up at great speed into the police car that had pulled him over for speeding. The impact had caused him to crack his nose open on his own steering wheel and get 2 black eyes. Or the time he was sitting on the glass of the office photocopier to copy his bare bum, when the glass shattered and splintered into his flesh. Or the time he had worked at the bowling alley and got his fingers stuck in the holes of the ball that he was demonstrating for some kids. He went flying down the alley and into the pinsetter machine. He now knew where the terms "spare tire","gutter mouth", "pins & needles" and "split lip" came from. Yes, Stanley spent so much time at the local emergency room, that the staff had bought him his own coffee mug, just so they could take turns cracking up over his incident reports. But all that was about to change. Stanley had been hired to do his dream job. No more harmiliation for him...it would be someone else's turn. Yes, Stanley had been hired as a consultant for the Workers Compensation Board!

Etymology: harm (any physical damage to the body caused by violence or accident or fracture etc. or the act of damaging something or someone) & humiliate (cause to feel shame; hurt the pride of or embarrass)

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COMMENTS:

Yes, but will Stanley now get a paper cut on his eye, stab himself with stapler, or even smash his finger on the copy machine lid? - pieceof314, 2008-04-15: 13:17:00

Most likely given his track record...I forgot about the time he worked at the butchers and accidentally backed up into the meat grinder, which made him get a little behind in his work...Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:41:00

Good one! - Mustang, 2008-04-16: 05:15:00

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Created by: bdraffen0002

Pronunciation: /ˈskôfəl/

Sentence: I pulled my back when I got in a scoffle with my phone, I was trying to plug it in under the counter without it turning on.

Etymology: Scoff: late 18th century (as a verb): originally a variant of Scots and dialect scaff . The noun is from Afrikaans schoff, representing Dutch schoft ‘quarter of a day,’ (by extension) ‘meal.’ and Scuffle late 16th century (as a verb): probably of Scandinavian origin; compare with Swedish skuffa ‘to push’; related to shove and shuffle.

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