Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. tr. To eat in a peculiar or ritualistic manner in an effort to lose weight while consuming more. n. An idiosyncratic method of eating, usually adopted for "health reasons".
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Gorgemony
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: GORJ-eh-mone-ey
Sentence: Clarissa is a gorgemony devotee who engages in a ritualistic 'dining' wherein she endlessly and vigorously eats huge amounts of granola bars, a variety of nuts and dried fruits and other organic foods that she believes will insure her lasting health and vitality.
Etymology: Blend of the words 'gorge' (v. to stuff with food (usually used reflexively or passively) and 'ceremony' (n. any formal act or observance, especially a meaningless one)
Constipulsion
Created by: rephil
Pronunciation: kahn-stih-PUL-zhun
Sentence: Ada's numerous constipulsions meant that the waiter's order read like a manual for diffusing a bomb -- which, in fact, it was.
Etymology: compulsion -- an irrational need to do something; consume -- to use, eat; constipation -- a condition where the digestion is stuck in a particular state. Verb: (irr.) Constipuleat
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COMMENTS:
Too bad you can't enter both the noun and verb forms of the definition! - rephil, 2007-06-20: 10:00:00
I like the sound of both of them! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 10:12:00
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Alphabedining
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: alfa be dyn ing
Sentence: Being a slave to fad dieting, Trixie had found a new regime to try. It was called alphabedining and basically you could order whatever you wanted as long as you ate fruits and vegetables in the alphabetical order of their names. So she would eat the apples, apricots or avocados first. Then the bananas, beans, beets next. By LMNO, she was usually full. At this rate, Trixie would never get to eat yams or zucchini again.
Etymology: Alphabet (a character set that includes letters and is used to write a language) & Dining (eating,consuming food)
Glutsploit
Created by: ErWenn
Pronunciation: /glʌtsplɔɪt/
Sentence: He spent much effort tyring to glutsploit his diets and fitnesse his exercise schemes, searching for a lazy way to lose weight. He did succeed in losing weight, but in the end, his complicated methods involved more work than he would have spent on calorie-counting and daily exercise. Some think that his weight loss was due more to the extreme stress caused by his methods than it was to the methods themselves.
Etymology: From glut + exploit
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COMMENTS:
Wow - no wonder it took you so long to get that sentence out - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-20: 12:36:00
That actually only took a few minutes. I just had to go teach my classes for the day beforehand, and I wanted to get a word out first in hopes of gleaning some morning votes. - ErWenn, 2007-06-20: 18:01:00
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Celeremony
Created by: Alchemist
Pronunciation: SEL-uh-ree-moh-nee
Sentence: Elena reverently placed the perfectly trimmed stalks into place - a perfect pentagram (5 grams), in preparation for her nightly celeremony.
Etymology: celery, ceremony
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COMMENTS:
did she get much of a celeriaction - galwaywegian, 2007-06-20: 06:38:00
Ahh, preparation for celery sacrificing. - petaj, 2007-06-20: 08:15:00
I bet her body was riddled with celleryulite - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-20: 08:43:00
Not only did she have celleryulite, but her carroted artery was clogged. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 08:59:00
The sacred celeremony is necessary to achieve vegemony. - Alchemist, 2007-06-20: 14:38:00
And after that is there a celerybration? - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-20: 15:30:00
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Gastrowonky
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: ga-stro-wong-kee
Sentence: Jill's diet has gone completely gastrowonky. She's decided to only eat things that start with the letter "G". Most of her friends pass on offers to join her for a breakfast of grapefruit with grated cheese. They run the other way when she mentions garlic granola.
Etymology: gastronomic (the art or science of good eating) + wonky (askew)
Grazecraze
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: grayze/crayze
Sentence: The latest diet endorsed by leading experts was the grazecraze which involved eating small amounts of food all day whenever one felt the urge - usually by nibbling bits of everyone elses snacks. The guy in the comic has been on the diet for a month and is pissed off that the girl is licking his next snack.
Etymology: graze (forage) + craze
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COMMENTS:
Grazey, man, grazey. - Clayton, 2007-06-20: 07:12:00
I've been ruminating on this. Bet I cud lose weight this way. Anybody got a Moo Pie? - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 08:43:00
you guys aren't going to milk this are you? - rikboyee, 2007-06-20: 09:00:00
Not me - I lactose kind of comments. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 09:09:00
you udder yet another pun! - jadenguy, 2007-06-20: 09:17:00
I'm gonna bovine another thing to do on the internet. i swear. - jadenguy, 2007-06-20: 09:18:00
Fine! Beef that way! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 09:20:00
goodness grazeious - great bulls of fire - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-20: 09:24:00
Bullocks! Another freakin' song! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 09:38:00
cattle be stuck in your head for the rest of the day! - jadenguy, 2007-06-20: 09:50:00
Yep, til the cows come home. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 10:15:00
I got temporarily logged off - cow'd that happen? - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-20: 10:41:00
Dangus thing I ever herd of! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 10:56:00
Maybe it just happens heifery so often? - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 11:03:00
you guys are just so clheifer. I calf never laughed so herd - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-20: 11:32:00
I like this brand of humor, it eases my moosery. - Alchemist, 2007-06-20: 14:44:00
well moosery does love cowpany - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-20: 15:25:00
Hey! All this cow talk just reminded me that I need to send for the tickets to the annual Cow Flop. Thanks! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 15:53:00
I calfn't had so much pun in ages - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-20: 16:40:00
I believe the word is "Cowabunga!" - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 17:12:00
can you stop punning??....i bet your not cowpabull...go on...i dairy you - rikboyee, 2007-06-20: 18:12:00
Never! I won't cow-tow to the likes of you! (I mean that in a nice way.) - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 18:26:00
I bet 5 bucks that we cowd goat on forheifer. But maybe it's time to steer the topic away. Can you ranch yourself away from cattle? No more sheep laughs at the cow's expense. - petaj, 2007-06-20: 23:19:00
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Safepecks
Created by: purpleartichokes
Pronunciation: safe-pex
Sentence: After failing on both the Fatkins Diet and SlimFat, Louise tried practicing Safepecks, slowly nibbling on small bits of food. Unfortunately, for her, it only meant that it took her two hours to finish off the entire pizza.
Etymology: safe sex, peck
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COMMENTS:
It's important to use condiments. - Clayton, 2007-06-20: 05:56:00
especially if you're a dominoatrix - galwaywegian, 2007-06-20: 06:41:00
You guys are hot and cheesy today! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 06:49:00
Saucy, even. - Clayton, 2007-06-20: 07:08:00
Pizza with condiments - sounds like sheaths on toast. The Welsh like a rarebit, and salesmen like to celibate. - petaj, 2007-06-20: 08:24:00
Louise was a Pizza Slut. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-20: 08:54:00
A crusty, hand-tossed Pizza Slut. - Clayton, 2007-06-20: 17:23:00
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Insuffergest
Created by: weyrlady
Pronunciation: in-suffer-gest
Sentence: I hate having to insuffergest.
Etymology: insufficient + insufferable + suffer +ingest
Oddballimia
Created by: karenanne
Pronunciation: od bal EE mee ah
Sentence: Candy can't understand why she can't lose weight. She scrupulously avoids starches after 5:00 pm ("it turns right to fat"). She always carefully counts her daily calories. She eats lots of celery ("it takes more calories to digest it than it has in it, so that's negative calories"). She also eats a lot of spicy foods too ("that revs your metabolism and burns more calories"). Of course, drinks don't really count because they are mostly water; the same goes for soup. And everyone knows that the bites you take while you're cooking, to "taste test" the food, don't count. She does eat whatever is left on her kids' plates, but those calories don't count either because she eats standing up.
Etymology: oddball + bulimia
Comments:
Today's definition was inspired by Robert J. Sawyer's Rollback. It may be science fiction, but when Rob gets rolling you can't help but laugh at the details of our daily lives -- like eating pizza. Rollback's pizza moment starts off with, "She was used to the way her husband ate pizza, but couldn't actually say she liked it", and then jumps right into the gory details. Thanks Rob! ~ James
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