Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: veks yor syes

Sentence: When Vicki left Victor, he knew he had to vexyoursize and change his appearance in order to win her back or attract someone new. He tried diets, exercise and really could not afford surgery. Depressed he went into a bar to drown his sorrows. Feeling a little tipsy and slurring his words a bit, he stumbled home in the dark. He passed a church and decided to pray to the angels for a new look. He awoke the next day in the church and was stunned to see his reflection in a mirror. He looked worse! How could this be? At that point an old Irish Priest appeared at his side and said, "My son, you must be careful what you ask for when praying to the angels! Your speech was so slurred that they misunderstood you. You asked for a rose, instead of a new nose, so they gave you a big red one. You asked for a gin, instead of a new chin, so they gave you a double. You asked for bigger ears, they thought you said big arrears, so now you're broke. You asked for new hair, they thought you said a good scare, so now you have been neutered. You asked for new legs, they thought you said new pegs, so you can hobble home on two wooden ones. You asked for slimmer thighs, they thought you said dimmer eyes, so now you'll need strong glasses. You asked for a firm jaw, they thought you said a claw, so now you'll look talon-ted!"

Etymology: Vex (change the arrangement or position of;disturb the peace of mind of; afflict with mental agitation or distress) & Ex (former partner) & Your Size (body image, appearance) & exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit)

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Created by: WordSlammer

Pronunciation: Re-jeck-sir-ee

Sentence: The guy had Rejexsery after the divorce

Etymology:

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: boot-if-eye

Sentence: After being fired, Gloria headed straight to the salon to recover her equanimity with a head to toe bootification.

Etymology: The boot + beautify

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Created by: astorey

Pronunciation: nip-suk

Sentence: In a shameless effort to regain her mojo and show her ex(es) what they were missing, Vanessa went for the full nipsuck...from the "can't-stop-smiling facelift" to the drastic stomach stapling that kept her from eating anything on the many dinner dates she finagled through the ironically named www.divorcedandlovingit.com.

Etymology: Variation of nip and tuck.

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COMMENTS:

Four words! Hil Ar I Ous! - lumina, 2008-08-20: 15:20:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: trans-FIG-yur-ence

Sentence: Following a messy divorce that included a great deal of harsh criticism about his 'sagging' appearance, Martin began a rigorous program of transfigurence, and finding a great deal of success with his efforts has become a real hunk and is in great demand in the dating game.

Etymology: Based on the word 'transfigure' (vt. transform outwardly and usually for the better)

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: br ake owe verr

Sentence: his brakeover lasted six months, during which time he lost 10 pounds, bought four black polo necks and a large vat of blonde hair dye. now from the distance he looks like a novelty condom.

Etymology: makeover, break

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COMMENTS:

Good combo! - Scrumpy, 2007-09-20: 10:05:00

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Created by: Mrgoodtimes

Pronunciation: Su - per - fae - shul

Sentence: Nancy was in her 40s and newly single, so she made her appointment at the clinic to be superfacialled.

Etymology: Superficial - Facial, or other means of rejuvenation

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: ab/poll/ish

Sentence: The only way to abpolish her demons and win back her self esteem was to throw herself wholeheartedly into sculpting a new physique.

Etymology: ab (as in abdominal) + polish + abolish

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COMMENTS:

Anuddergudun'! - Scrumpy, 2007-09-20: 10:02:00

I must abpologize - I found this one tough so I had to milk it for all it was worth - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 10:35:00

Abpolish doesn't have the snarky pejorative connotations. Yours is best! - skeeterzirra, 2007-09-20: 14:23:00

Sure was a tough one. Abfab Jab! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-20: 17:46:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: SPREEN

Sentence: Harsh words from Roxie and a glance in the mirror was enough to spreen Bob into a strict dietary regimen and a strenuous fitness program. Furthermore, he planned to re-assessed his progress every September; it was, I guess, a personal "Spreenclean."

Etymology: Blend of SPURN & PREEN. Cognates: Spreenie .n; Spreeny adj.

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: met/uh/di/vohrs/sis

Sentence: To get back in the game after his marriage fell apart, he had to go through a metadivorcesis to redefine himself physically, mentally and spiritually.

Etymology: METADIVORCESIS - from - METAMORPHOSIS (any complete change in appearance, character, or circumstances) + DIVORCE (total separation, or disunion)

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