Verboticisms

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Di-vor-suk-shun

Sentence: When her divorce alimony came through, Jean decided to put some towards getting divorsuction, the new plastic surgery designed especially for the newly divorced in order to lose weight, ready to join the dating circuit again.

Etymology: Divorce(divor) + liposuction (suction) = Divorsuction

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sad apt

Sentence: After his wife of 20 years dumped him for the pool boy,Kevin decided to enjoy himself and adapt a swinging bachelor lifestyle. His after-work beer therapy sessions gave him a much larger girth than before and his attempts to sadapt to the hedonistic life,made his fsvourite song, "The girls get prettier at closing time..."

Etymology: Sad (bad; unfortunate) & Adapt (make fit for, or change to suit a new purpose)

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Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: jim-pen-sayt

Sentence: he looked in the mirror and decided then and there that he was going to gympensate like a crazy man

Etymology: gym, compensate

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: Ree-nay-sen-shul-ate. Noun form: Renaisexual (a la Metrosexual, etc.)

Sentence: A glance in the mirror told Bob that he was hunkjunk: broad, bewigged and fifty, and greatly in need of a strict diet and a strenuous fitness regime to renaisensuate himself. Aucupation had been his pre-occupation, but now he had more feathered friends than fair ones. Perhaps, wondered Bob, would plastic surgery mould him into the renaisexual he longed to be?

Etymology: Blend of Renaissance: renewal, rebirth & sensual: pertaining to the body and physical senses & ate: suffix indicating action of person performing function. Aucupate:bird catching.

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COMMENTS:

I think Bob should use some common renaissense and opt for the good diet - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 11:24:00

Yikes!! sorry Ozziebob - I just realized you might be referring to yourself - hope I didn't insult you - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 13:56:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: re bayt

Sentence: When Stanley Kupp went trawling for female companionship after his nasty divorce, he decided he needed to rebait the old Stanley hook to make himself look attractive. Alas, no amount of dieting, exercising, tanning or surgery could undo the 28 years' married toll on his former athletic shape. Time and again, he could hear that old play-by-play in his head..."He shoots, He doesn't score!"

Etymology: Re (to do again) & Bait (to lure, entice, or entrap)...wordplay on rebate (to get a little something back)

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Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: mod-im-ij-fy

Sentence: Jeb shouldn't have modifmagefied his body to look like Britney, as she had also modimagefied herself to look like Madonna, but was unsuccessful.

Etymology: modify + image

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Created by: ScrabbledEgg

Pronunciation: uh-DAH-ni-sighz

Sentence: Mid-life algebra lesson: 1 corporate downsize + 1 marital excise + 100's of drive thru Supersizes = time to Adonisize!

Etymology: Adonis, size, exercise

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Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: dum-proov

Sentence: After the divorce, Bert decided he needed to dumprove his image. He lost his unibrow with the help of Nair, but his beach-ball belly was going to need drastic surgery.

Etymology: dump, improve

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COMMENTS:

I thought the unibrow was fashionable again. Hmmm... Great word! - Scrumpy, 2007-09-20: 10:12:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: veks yor syes

Sentence: When Vicki left Victor, he knew he had to vexyoursize and change his appearance in order to win her back or attract someone new. He tried diets, exercise and really could not afford surgery. Depressed he went into a bar to drown his sorrows. Feeling a little tipsy and slurring his words a bit, he stumbled home in the dark. He passed a church and decided to pray to the angels for a new look. He awoke the next day in the church and was stunned to see his reflection in a mirror. He looked worse! How could this be? At that point an old Irish Priest appeared at his side and said, "My son, you must be careful what you ask for when praying to the angels! Your speech was so slurred that they misunderstood you. You asked for a rose, instead of a new nose, so they gave you a big red one. You asked for a gin, instead of a new chin, so they gave you a double. You asked for bigger ears, they thought you said big arrears, so now you're broke. You asked for new hair, they thought you said a good scare, so now you have been neutered. You asked for new legs, they thought you said new pegs, so you can hobble home on two wooden ones. You asked for slimmer thighs, they thought you said dimmer eyes, so now you'll need strong glasses. You asked for a firm jaw, they thought you said a claw, so now you'll look talon-ted!"

Etymology: Vex (change the arrangement or position of;disturb the peace of mind of; afflict with mental agitation or distress) & Ex (former partner) & Your Size (body image, appearance) & exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit)

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Created by: SethelMerman

Pronunciation: em-yoo-LATE-ur-a-shun

Sentence: "My emulateration is complete, should Cher stumble onstage, her tone-deaf back up dancer can step in and save the day. Where did I put my marbles? " ~Shar Bano, Backstage

Etymology: From (Emulate: to imitate to try to equal or excel) + (alteration: the state of being altered. Changed)

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