Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: veks yor syes

Sentence: When Vicki left Victor, he knew he had to vexyoursize and change his appearance in order to win her back or attract someone new. He tried diets, exercise and really could not afford surgery. Depressed he went into a bar to drown his sorrows. Feeling a little tipsy and slurring his words a bit, he stumbled home in the dark. He passed a church and decided to pray to the angels for a new look. He awoke the next day in the church and was stunned to see his reflection in a mirror. He looked worse! How could this be? At that point an old Irish Priest appeared at his side and said, "My son, you must be careful what you ask for when praying to the angels! Your speech was so slurred that they misunderstood you. You asked for a rose, instead of a new nose, so they gave you a big red one. You asked for a gin, instead of a new chin, so they gave you a double. You asked for bigger ears, they thought you said big arrears, so now you're broke. You asked for new hair, they thought you said a good scare, so now you have been neutered. You asked for new legs, they thought you said new pegs, so you can hobble home on two wooden ones. You asked for slimmer thighs, they thought you said dimmer eyes, so now you'll need strong glasses. You asked for a firm jaw, they thought you said a claw, so now you'll look talon-ted!"

Etymology: Vex (change the arrangement or position of;disturb the peace of mind of; afflict with mental agitation or distress) & Ex (former partner) & Your Size (body image, appearance) & exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit)

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Created by: WordSlammer

Pronunciation: Re-jeck-sir-ee

Sentence: The guy had Rejexsery after the divorce

Etymology:

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: metəmôrfāləsəs

Sentence: After his wife left, Bruce went on a gym spree. Fellow patrons knew him as big guy in the wet sweats. He expected a huge change. He experienced metamorfailosis. Caterpillar in. Caterpillar out.

Etymology: metamorphosis (a change of the form or nature of a thing or person into a completely different one) + Fail (be unsuccessful in achieving one’s goal)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sad apt

Sentence: After his wife of 20 years dumped him for the pool boy,Kevin decided to enjoy himself and adapt a swinging bachelor lifestyle. His after-work beer therapy sessions gave him a much larger girth than before and his attempts to sadapt to the hedonistic life,made his fsvourite song, "The girls get prettier at closing time..."

Etymology: Sad (bad; unfortunate) & Adapt (make fit for, or change to suit a new purpose)

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: met/uh/di/vohrs/sis

Sentence: To get back in the game after her marriage fell apart, she had to go through a metadivorcsis to redefine herself physically, mentally and spiritually.

Etymology: metamorphosis + divorce

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COMMENTS:

Great! It has a Latin ring to it. It also connects the knee bone to the ankle bone I think. - Scrumpy, 2007-09-20: 10:09:00

I like the idea of "meta-divorce" as a term transcending divorce as well - astorey, 2008-08-20: 12:18:00

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Created by: hyperborean

Pronunciation: sue per FAY shuhl

Sentence: Her tears were beginning to carve channels, but instead of facing her pain, she made another appointment for a superfacial.

Etymology: Based on "superficial": of, affecting or being on the surface. (super: exceeding a norm) + (facial: a cosmetic treatment for the face)

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈmeɪkoʊvəˌɹiækt/

Sentence: The reality show "If My Ex Could See Me Now" became very popular due to the disastrous makeoverreactions of its stars.

Etymology: makeover + overreact

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COMMENTS:

good one ErWenn - nice to see you're back - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 12:11:00

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Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: jim-pen-sayt

Sentence: he looked in the mirror and decided then and there that he was going to gympensate like a crazy man

Etymology: gym, compensate

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: Ree-nay-sen-shul-ate. Noun form: Renaisexual (a la Metrosexual, etc.)

Sentence: A glance in the mirror told Bob that he was hunkjunk: broad, bewigged and fifty, and greatly in need of a strict diet and a strenuous fitness regime to renaisensuate himself. Aucupation had been his pre-occupation, but now he had more feathered friends than fair ones. Perhaps, wondered Bob, would plastic surgery mould him into the renaisexual he longed to be?

Etymology: Blend of Renaissance: renewal, rebirth & sensual: pertaining to the body and physical senses & ate: suffix indicating action of person performing function. Aucupate:bird catching.

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COMMENTS:

I think Bob should use some common renaissense and opt for the good diet - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 11:24:00

Yikes!! sorry Ozziebob - I just realized you might be referring to yourself - hope I didn't insult you - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 13:56:00

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Created by: astorey

Pronunciation: nip-suk

Sentence: In a shameless effort to regain her mojo and show her ex(es) what they were missing, Vanessa went for the full nipsuck...from the "can't-stop-smiling facelift" to the drastic stomach stapling that kept her from eating anything on the many dinner dates she finagled through the ironically named www.divorcedandlovingit.com.

Etymology: Variation of nip and tuck.

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COMMENTS:

Four words! Hil Ar I Ous! - lumina, 2008-08-20: 15:20:00

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