Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A person who has the highly developed ability to communicate on a direct level with any type of animal, except for human beings. v. To talk to animals because you know that communicating with people is useless.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Zoochat
Created by: DrWebsterIII
Pronunciation: zoo' - chat
Sentence: Jodi was a real quackadoodle when it came to the animal kingdom, she much preferred to zoochat with the animals than the human race
Etymology: zoo ( Gr. animals) + chat (talk, converse, communicate)
Petagogue
Created by: karenanne
Pronunciation: PET ah gog
Sentence: The reason Ann Noy talks with animals is that no people WANT to talk with her. She is a petagogue, spewing her dog-ma all the time. She talks until she's horse. People are too cowed by her obviously superior intelligence to ox her what she's talking about, and it's too difficult to ferret out the meaning. Everyone ducks when they see her coming, and they just want to bat her away. So she long ago gave up trying to figure out why people were so catty about her, and retreated, tortoiselike, to her cocoon to live out her days as an animal whisperer.
Etymology: pet + pedagogue (a person who teaches, instructs, or talks in a manner that is excessively dogmatic, shows off his or her learnedness or overemphasizes minor details)
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COMMENTS:
Hart-felt story...porpoiseful and not boaring! - Nosila, 2010-06-04: 23:55:00
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Fretubrute
Created by: doseydotes
Pronunciation: ˈfret-ˈtü-ˈbrü-ˈte
Sentence: Celia rushed home at night, anxious to see her three cats. They were friends to her like no one else; they always listened to her worries with what was apparent sympathy. They were calm and patient and loving, just like she wished her human friends could be. She had taken to talking to them from the minute she got up – even while she was in the shower - because she knew they’d be alone all day, lost without her. At the last possible minute, when she had just barely enough time to make it to work, she left. As soon as the door closed, one of the male cats always turned to the other one and rolled his eyes. “I know. I know,” the second cat would always say (it had turned into a running joke between them) “what a freakin’ fretubrute.”
Etymology: From the Transylvanian, fret, a diminutive of Frederick; from the LeHigh, tu bru, meaning literally "please bring me a couple of bottles of whatever tasty fermented starch-based hop-flavored beverage is most readily available"; and from the Buckwheat, te, an abbreviated version of "otay," meaning "everything is going to be just fine, sir."
Glossomammalia
Created by: mrskellyscl
Pronunciation: gloss-o-mam-mail-i-a
Sentence: Emma, Dr. Doolittle's faithful assistant received the gift of glossomammalia one night at an ASPCA rally. She was an especially talented duck whisperer and soon was given her own show on Animal Planet where she would drive to the homes of people who had pets with issues and grievances against their owners. Eventually she went into animalaw, and succesfully argued in front of the Supreme Court to change the law to allow pets to sue their owners for cruelty.
Etymology: Glossolalia: "The gift of tongues" an estatic speech uttered in the worship services of several sects stressing emotion and religious ferver + mammalia: mammal, the highest class of vertebra.
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COMMENTS:
Strangely animerotic word. very good. - metrohumanx, 2009-05-18: 02:17:00
Animammerotic mammocentrism of the highest order! (but not the 'highest class' since none is 'higher' than another) - dochanne, 2009-05-18: 03:14:00
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Anication
Created by: Biscotti
Pronunciation: an-uh-kay-shun
Sentence: When Angie started talking to the mosquitos, her parents knew she was practicing anication. She refused to speak to any human being, claiming that animals and/or insects were far superior in intelligence; meaning they made better conversation as well.
Etymology: Animal (lions and tigers and bears..oh my!) + communication (to speak with)
Zooracle
Created by: Banky
Pronunciation: zho-or-ah-kil
Sentence: "The Master demands a sacrifice, David," said Harvey, his canines bared as he paced along the fence next door, "He finds your limited faith insufficient." The labrador stopped and stared through the chain links at him vacantly. David held his head in his hands. Could this be happening? Was he a zooracle or just losing his mind? Either way, he had to silence the persistent animal, so he would silence him with sacrifice. "My fealty to the dark lord will be apparent by this afternoon." He disappeared into house and grabbed his .44 caliber Bulldog revolver, and stalked to his car. The tires squealed and the Ford Galaxie sped off into the city. When the car was a waning mirage the two teenage boys stepped out from behind Sam Carr's house, cackling with laughter and holding a walkie-talkie. "That Berkowitz kid is an IDIOT!" the taller of the two said, as they walked to the black lab and unstrapped the other handset from the dogs collar.
Etymology: zoo - prefix relating to animals, oracle - a chosen person who can interpret normally unintelligible communications from non-human sources
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COMMENTS:
I considered 'oracle' as a component. I was thinking along the lines of, 'animoracle.' Nice combination. - stache, 2008-03-28: 01:27:00
oh...my...god. er, dog. - stache, 2008-03-28: 01:38:00
excellent - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-28: 11:24:00
Wow, Banky! Very imaginative theory on the 'Son of Sam' serial killer story, (in case anyone didn't catch that), and, I might add, chillingly morbid. Great stuff. - Tigger, 2008-03-30: 03:42:00
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Critterpatter
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: crit - er - patr
Sentence: Helga had a gift that enabled her to 'converse' with all sorts of animals and whenever she was around them she'd keep up a continual twitter of critterpatter.
Etymology: critter and patter
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COMMENTS:
love it - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-28: 11:23:00
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Zoomunicate
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: zoo-MYOO-ni-keyt. (uh-see-SEE-eyt)
Sentence: Some people looked upon Bob as the zoological equivalent of Zamenhof, {or a modern day St Francis of Assissi)zoomunicating(assissiating) with the animal world in a language he called, "Menagerese". Others, however, thought that he was nothing more than a greedy, guttural rat; or, at best, a self-deluded do-little, who needed to see a "quack" immediately.
Etymology: ZOOMUNICATE: Blend of zoo:Gk element meaning animal and communicate. QUACK: "medical charlatan, doctor (slang) short for quacksalver, from Du. kwaksalver, lit. "hawker of salve," 2. The harsh, throaty sound of a duck. ASSISSIATE: as in St Francis of Assissi:patron saint of animals; who, it is claimed, was able to talk to animals.
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COMMENTS:
I like this one almost as well as Tigger's! Maybe just one 'm' less. - stache, 2008-03-28: 01:25:00
If I have unintentiontally "stolen" or plagiarize Tigger's verbotomy: please consider "assissiate" as my verbotomy for today. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-28: 04:13:00
(chuckle) - stache, 2008-03-28: 10:09:00
hey Ozzie - Steve0 already beat you to it with assisiate - I'm sure your very fertile mind can come up with another one though - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-28: 11:18:00
why don't we go with 'Menagerese' - that's a great word - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-28: 13:18:00
I think I'lI take your advice, JBW. Impossible for me not to vote for this one. "Great" minds and all that stuff! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-28: 23:39:00
you kill me, ob. - stache, 2008-03-30: 20:50:00
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Verteprate
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: virt ta prayt
Sentence: Helen could communicate with all animals. Her ability to verteprate came at an early age and served her well to interrogate the pets of crime victims, perepetrators and witnesses, as a special service to the police. It was amazing what we do and say in front of our pets because we think they won't talk. But Helen could get pets to verify alibis, deny stories and defeat many a criminal in his illegal ways. Pets told no lies nor harboured any ulterior motives for their statements. Helen only wished her gift worked on her 13 year old son, but alas that is not the way life goes!
Etymology: Vertebrate (animal having a having a bony or cartilaginous skeleton with a segmented spinal column and a large brain enclosed in a skull or cranium) & Prate ( idle or foolish and irrelevant talk; speak (about unimportant matters) rapidly and incessantly)
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COMMENTS:
Eggzellunt!! Furshur. - Mustang, 2009-05-18: 07:54:00
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Featherbrain
Created by: theCountess
Pronunciation: feather-brain
Sentence: Boring old definition of featherbrain: an emptyheaded person Verboticized new definition of featherbrain: an emptyheaded person who uses only fowl language
Etymology: Featherhead: noun, Old English; to have feathers for brains
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COMMENTS:
It must be fowl play.. or maybe vowel play :P - dochanne, 2009-05-18: 03:19:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by leechdude. Thank you leechdude. ~ James
stache - 2008-03-28: 01:36:00
Great 'toon, as usual. Thanks for the def, too, leechdude.
stache - 2008-03-28: 17:48:00
thanks, JW.
stache - 2008-03-28: 17:50:00
oops. wrong box.
We are starting our summer season at Verbotomy today -- which means we are re-doing some of favorite Verbotomies from the past. Today's definition was suggested by leechdude. Thank you leechdude ~ James
readerwriter - 2009-05-18: 10:06:00
Whew...thanks for the update! I thought it was reducks...
Reducks revisited... ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by leechdude. Thank you leechdude. ~ James
LunnonFurl - 2018-06-06: 13:27:00
Israfaceneeme - 2018-06-06: 19:12:00
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