Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. Embarrassing pet behavior; may be perfectly natural for the pet, but often makes humans feel self-conscious or ill at ease. v. To be embarrassed by your pet's beahviour
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
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Birdition
Created by: porsche
Pronunciation: burd/i/shun
Sentence: I always feel like I'm in birdition when I visit Jill's house. She has canarys that fly free and deposit loads of bird crap and feathers on me.
Etymology: bird + perdition (anguish, nether world)
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COMMENTS:
It's brave soul who walks the road to birdition. Take a raincoat. - petaj, 2007-04-27: 21:02:00
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Petpeeved
Created by: karenanne
Pronunciation: pet PEEVD
Sentence: Kitty was really petpeeved about her dog's behavior whenever people would come to visit. He growled at men and was rovereager to "greet" all the women. He petstered them until they felt quite roverwhelmed.
Etymology: pet + peeved (bothered, annoyed); a play on "pet peeve"
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COMMENTS:
dog-gone good word...loved rovereager/roverwhelmed! - Nosila, 2009-11-13: 12:11:00
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Droolofdenial
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: drool of de ny al
Sentence: When Jack Russell ran into Germaine Shepherd at the Greyhound Bus Depot, he had been walking his hound, Fido. Fido immediately jumped all over Germaine and slobbered all over her face. She shouted at Jack to Puli him off her. Jack tried valiantly but said, "Sorry, he's just friendly...he has so much love to give, like me! You are such a pretty Lassie!" Germaine unleashed her fury and demanded that Jack & Fido's adoration be harnassed. To calm Germaine, he invited her into the nearest pub, "The Dirty Dog" for a hair of the dog that bit her. She told the bartender, "I'll Havanese...no, make it a double!" Jack ordered a Scotch Terrier and soda. "Muzzle Tov!", he said and they had a few more. "Jack", she said, "You are not such a bad breed, but you need to send Fido to obedience school". When he objected, she told him she was not usually a Pointer, but he was in a Droolofdenial and that if he wanted to see her again, he'd have to obey. Well, our Jack tried many schools, he even went as far away as Labrador, Newfoundland, the Great Pyrenees, even Afghanistan, Lhasa Apso, Chihuahua and Brittany. But none could train his Fido not to drool. He had run away for months. He even prayed to Saint Bernard for guidance. Finally, he returned to the pub and was panting when he saw Germaine,looking fetching in her Poodle skirt, eating Beagles & Lox and drinking Bassett Ale. When he went over to Retriever, he saw that she was curled up with a Husky Boxer, a Great Dane named Erik, who was eating his Chow with a Pinscher salt,some Collieflour and some Maltese candies. He was also taking a Pekingnese at her Schnauzer with his Bischon Frise, his Mastiff, as he tried to Whippet out. Russell thought it disgusting and trotted over to mark his territory. "Oh, Jack", she said, "Don't be Samoyed... what you felt was only Puppy Love for me, what I love about Erik is that he is a Rover, not a Setter, the best Keeshond I've had and he won't Stay unless I want him to!" Jack slinked out of the pub, with his tail between his legs, saying, "That Bitch, I'm so past Cairn! I don't give a Rin Tin Tin for her"
Etymology: drool (slobber, saliva spilling from the mouth,pretentious or silly talk or writing) & denial ((psychiatry) a defense mechanism that denies painful thoughts;the act of refusing to comply (as with a request);the act of asserting that something alleged is not true) & Jewel of The Nile (for rhyming effect)(a popular 1985 Michael Douglas/Kathleen Turner/Danny DeVito movie whose tagline was "When the going gets tough, the tough get going".
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COMMENTS:
Great K9 tail. Tell Jack Russell that Afghani Stan is full of kabul. By the way, where did Din go? - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-04: 03:07:00
I had a dog like that once....half poodle and half poodle...a poopoo dog. - Mustang, 2008-07-04: 17:09:00
Bob, I think Din was led by his nose somewhere...aren't thney all? Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-07-05: 00:22:00
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Faunagaffe
Created by: metrohumanx
Pronunciation: FA-NUH-GAF
Sentence: Rescued from an animal shelter in her youth, KATIECAT returned my affection by killing a rabbit and bringing it home. The neighborhood children were grossed out by this feline FAUNAGAFFE, but they're sure to experience many more examples of misguided animal behavior as they grow up.
Etymology: FAUNA-animals in general + GAFFE- a socially inappropriate act or faux pas (Fr- false step)
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COMMENTS:
True story-exceeded only by the boorish behavior of irresponsible pet owner apologists whose permissive approach to animal discipline results in the alarming rise of leg-humping incidents, pit bull attacks and random neighborhood defecation incidents.
- metrohumanx, 2008-07-04: 07:40:00
verbotomists really struck a nerve with all the FIDO references today - we are into the dogdays of summer though so not surprising you would get so dogmatic about it - love your word btw - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-04: 10:33:00
Metro, do you really want us to BIRDen you with CATastrophic tails of PETophilia? As a proud owner of many species, we all know that the little rascals are capable of many ASPects of antihuman social behavior.I could get HORSE talking about my experiences on this animal planet, but truly dogs do drool the most, even though hamsters are gnawty, guinea pigs squeal on you, bunnies carrot not a bit about your feelings, turtles are shell-shocked, lizards lounge at will and fish annoy you just for the halibut. Budgies won't budge, canaries sing to the authorities and cats, well they'd be good poker players, not a shred of emotion shown on their smug faces. But keep up the good words...we are all fauned of you! - Nosila, 2008-07-05: 00:16:00
Seems like Katiecat's faunagaffe is largely fawnagaffe. Another top word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-05: 06:54:00
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Geneticat
Created by: CharlieB
Pronunciation: jen-et-ee-cat
Sentence: Miss Smythe was rather embarrased when Felix spayed the furniture in front of her guests. But she accepted that it was part of her puss's geneticat.
Etymology: genetic (influenced by genes) + cat (a domesticated feline) + etiquette (a code for social behaviour)
Fur pas
Created by: rikboyee
Pronunciation: ferr-pah
Sentence: His dog burying its face into his new girlfriends groin was an embarrassing Fur Pas
Etymology: Fur, Faux Pas
Profaunation
Created by: airlie
Pronunciation: pro-FAW-nay-shun
Sentence: Eleanor lunged backwards as Fido's attentions elevated from a friendly tail wag to intense profaunation. As though talking to Jed wasn't difficult enough, with his intense staring and too-friendly shoulder rubs and sneaky thigh touches, now his dog was invading her space. Feeling violated, Eleanor exclaimed to Jed, "Help! Your dog is trying to kiss me!" Jed snickered, and grabbed Fido's leash. "Down Fido! Down!" he exclaimed. "Sorry," he said, halfheartedly. "He's just very friendly." Eleanor wondered what else Fido and Jed had in common...
Etymology: PROFANATION: the act of profaning; desecration; defilement; debasement (PROFANE: to misuse something that should be held in reverence or respect) + FAUNA: the animals of a given region or period considered as a whole
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COMMENTS:
great word - hey metro - you missed one - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-04: 10:26:00
Terrific. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-05: 07:12:00
PROFAWNATION's nice- but it could be misinterpreted as a nation populated by professional adolescent whitetail deer.....?
Which are SURE to be chased by......FIDO! - metrohumanx, 2008-07-05: 10:19:00
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Petophile
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: petəfīl
Sentence: There is a rule at the dog park that no children under 12 should enter the off-leash area. To do so often results in the children being knocked over and petophiled by most of the male and many of the female dogs present. Looks like that **Birds & Bees** talk may need to be moved up on the calendar.
Etymology: pet (a domestic or tamed animal or bird kept for companionship or pleasure and treated with care and affection) + pedophile (a person who is sexually attracted to children)
Animtendis
Created by: Ellemorpheus
Pronunciation: An-M-Ten-dis
Sentence: His dog's animtendis ensured that his date ended, abruptly, after it began.
Etymology: anim-animal tend-tendency synonym of instinct dis- negative, to move awayfrom
Cringelick
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: KRINJ-lick
Sentence: Roxie spoke calmly; but as I looked at her countenance I observed a strange expression pass over it. "Are you in pain, Roxie?" I asked. " Not exactly, Bob," she answered; though I don't wish to alarm you by telling what Fido is about to do. As I watched Fido, muddy paws and all, was quickly making his way towards a lady dressed from head to toe in pink. In the next second, to my horror, his tail wagging fawnishly, and with his paws placed firmly on her waist, he planted his slobbery tongue on her chin. Although there was nothing I could do that was likely to do any good; but, by way of an apology, I try to explain to her about Fido's friendly zanimality for persons dressed in pink; whilst, at the same time, hoping that my love for Fido would carry me through this attack of cringelick, or whatever it was.
Etymology: CRINGE: To draw one's self together as in fear or crouch with base humility; to wince & LICK: to pass the tongue over the surface of, as to moisten, taste, or eat. ZANIMALITY: zany & animal & -ity.
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COMMENTS:
VERY creative Ozziebob.
But as FIDO's attorney, I must inform you that character assasination is prohibited by law.
FIDO has paid for his crimes and is prevented from obtaining gainful employment by these constant media attacks on his character.
I appeal to the pubic's sense of fair play and implore you to stop dragging FIDO's name through the mud and bringing it inside covered in dog saliva and leaving it on my good rug.... - metrohumanx, 2008-07-04: 08:06:00
I love zanimality too - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-04: 10:38:00
I have heard of other dogs who do this. Perhaps there's a cringelick epizootic? - Mustang, 2008-07-04: 17:12:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes.
Thank you purpleartichokes! ~ James
Yes the rumors are true. This week we are offering the The Verbotomy Cup as prize for the top player of the week. See details on the Verbotomy Blog ~ James
Jabberwocky - 2007-04-27: 12:54:00
Hi Verbotomy, Those cups (mugs)are really great. Would it be possible for any of us to purchase ones even if we don't win?
Hi Jabberwocky, Glad you like the Verbotomy Cup! It is our wampeter, and as such I don't think we would sell it, because that might turn it into a MacGuffin. ~ James
Is it our waxing or waning wampeter? What's the other one (since a karass always has exactly two wampeters)?
I believe it is still waxing. And think that Dan Pink's right brain is the other wampeter. ~ James
mana1066 - 2007-05-06: 23:04:00
some of that went right over my head. whine! i want a cup too!
Quit a tail from the punster extrordinaire! Poor FIDO is the Lee Harvey Oswald of doggie misbehavior.
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James