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'I knew you didn't want anything fattening...'

DEFINITION: n. A valentine gift which does not cause weight gain. v. To give a non-fattening gift as a symbol of love, which should not be interpreted -- under any circumstances -- as a comment on the recipient's weight.

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Verboticisms

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Goodiva

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: gooddahyva

Sentence: Will's ample-figured girlfriend loves her chocolate. Valentine's Day puts him in a quandary. Does he support her desire to be healthier or her vices? He may have found a way to do both as long as she doesn't notice the slight labeling change on the big box of sugar-free knockoff brand of Goodiva chocolates.

Etymology: good (of high quality) + Godiva (brand of high-end chocolate)

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Smattening

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: sma-ten-ing

Sentence: Steven Stoopifidis, made sure to give a smattening Valentines heart to his sweetie, Miss Bootie Badonkazonker.

Etymology: Smack - To strike or slap smartly, with or as if with the open hand. Fattening - To make plump or fat.

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Romanthin

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: row mann thin

Sentence: his romanthin gesture followed her non-appreciation of his romanthick gestures of previous years

Etymology: romantic, thin

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COMMENTS:

very funny - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-09: 13:26:00

Together ... thru thick and thin - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 19:52:00

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Karatcake

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kar at kayke

Sentence: Eddie always gave Shirley a karatcake for Valentine's day. It was a no-cal styrofoam corn cake with a piece of gold jewellery lying on it. But the price of gold kept going up, so next year he would probably get her a caratcake instead... you know the marriage proposal type of diamond ring.

Etymology: Karat (the weight of gold) & Cake (small flat mass of chopped food)

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Carborater

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: CAR-bo-rayt-ehr

Sentence: Much to the chagrin of his wife Lucy, Clarence was overly concerned about her health and her weight and he was a meticulous carborater and only upon careful examination of the listing of ingredients would he buy the least fattening foods, including Valentines day candy offerings.

Etymology: Blend of 'carbo' or (carbohydrate) and 'rater' (one who rates or assesses) A play on the word 'carburetor' (a device that meters 'fuel' to an engine)

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Yomammasoghurt

GlobalGallery

Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: yo-mumma-sow-gurt

Sentence: Brandon had made a special effort cooking for his wife Kylie for their 10th wedding anniversary. A seafood salad and some fine wine followed by fresh fruit and yomammasoghurt. "What's this?" asked Kylie. "Urm, the kids ate all the double choc-fudge ripple icecream" he sheepishly replied.

Etymology: 1. A play on the Yo' Mamma so fat jokes. eg 'Yo' Mamma so fat she aint got a waistline, she got an equator'. 'Yo' Mamma so fat they gotta take her licence picture with a satellite'. 2. yoghurt - a food product made from curdled milk.

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COMMENTS:

Never heard any Yo' Mamma jokes before, so thanks for for something new. Yoghurt is a word I'll be using as I don't like it. Well-crafted, punsome, funsome! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:35:00

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Allyouneedislove

Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: all you need is love

Sentence: Allyouneedislove love, love is all you need...not chocolate.

Etymology: From a famous song by the late John Lennon.

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Lovelite

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: luv lyte

Sentence: On their first date, he took her to a fast food restaurant. She left the ordering up to him, while eyeing the juicy triple bacon burgers, milkshakes and fries. He came back with exactly that as his order, but got for her instead a Coke Zero and a lettuce and tomato salad with no dressing. What she saw as his lovelight turned out to be a lovelite.

Etymology: Lovelight (a brightness of the eyes characteristic of someone in love) & Lite (diet, low calorie)

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Sweetgnawthings

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sweet naw things

Sentence: Why was it when James whispered sweetgnawthings into Jenny's ear,she felt hungry. He called her his Sweetie Pie; his Lamb Chop, his Tutti Frutti, his Honeycakes and his Chocolate Passion. Luckily these sweetgnawthings cost her no calories, but left her feeling hungry and needing something tasty.

Etymology: Sweet Nothings (to whisper inconsequential expressions of affection into her ear) & Gnaw (to bite or chew on with teeth)

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COMMENTS:

Mind play with word play! Wow! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:37:00

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Joulery

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: jool-er-ee

Sentence: As Carmella stared at the softly gleaming string of pearls in front of her, she knew she had invented the perfect Valentine's gift. She would apply for the patent today! The hard, round vitamin-packed, sugar-free morsels she had meticulously drilled holes in would be called "joulery." Her company would be called Aunty's Joules because, of course, she was against anyone gaining weight from eating her creation. She knew she had a winner in these tough economic times. Dinner and a gift, all in one!

Etymology: A play on JOULE, meaning the energy created by caloric intake.

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COMMENTS:

When Carmella discovered her pearls weren't real, was she shocked? - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 10:47:00

Yes, especially as they were cast before swine! - readerwriter, 2009-02-09: 15:14:00

LOL - silveryaspen, 2009-02-09: 19:48:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-02-09: 00:01:01
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2012-02-08: 00:37:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James