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'Ahhh! My hair! Don't let them see me like this!'

DEFINITION: v. To remain calm, steadfast and ploddingly systematic in the midst of a huge freaking disaster. n. A person who systematizes everything from their morning routines to personal relationships.

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Verboticisms

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Hypnotwisted

Created by: heartnsoul

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Clark was so hypnotwisted in the face of adversity, Mary wanted to pull her hair out.

Etymology: hypnotist + twisted

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Coolbloodism

allufunmarx

Created by: allufunmarx

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Trepulant

Created by: trunktickle

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Flusterbuster

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: fluh-stir-buh-stir

Sentence: While other spill responders were running around chaotically, I was able to flusterbuster the calm of Stuporman, knowing full well that the "white powdery substance" in the men's room was likely some guy's athlete's foot treatment.

Etymology: fluster, buster

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COMMENTS:

That has a neat sound to it! - jedijawa, 2007-05-10: 11:45:00

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Spock

Created by: autophile

Pronunciation: SPOCK

Sentence: Ron's boss panicked because his boss's boss panicked, and on up the line because sh*t flows downhill, but Ron casually spocked the problem and there was panic no more.

Etymology: From Star Trek's unflappable rational scientist, Mr. Spock.

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COMMENTS:

Gotta love Spock. In real life, he's a poet as well. I think he'd approve of Verbotomy. - purpleartichokes, 2007-05-10: 19:37:00

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Staotic

Created by: ekath

Pronunciation: stay-ot-tick

Sentence: Todd is so staotic that he didn't even cry out when the acid splashed in his face... he just calmly went over and pulled the safety shower. When it fire-hosed him into the ground, he shakily stood up and asked to go to the nurse's office. Carol should have been more like Todd.

Etymology: from stable + chaotic

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Unrufflood

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: un/ruff/flud

Sentence: He remained completely unrufflood even when the rising waters were close to his chin.

Etymology: unruffled + flood

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx UNRUFFLOOD- a very fluid interpretation, mon! - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:48:00

Nice flow about it. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:12:00

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Calmandant

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: colm man dant

Sentence: His real name was Edward Edwards, but we called him Steady Eddie. His middle name was Danger, you just knew it. He was the Safety Officer at work. You know, the guy they have to have on staff by law, who has weekly boring meetings, who arranges first-aid classes ad nauseum, who sends out zillions of safety tips and preventative brochures. You know, the guy who loves to organize fire drills, creates emergency preparedness policies, who lives for Fire Prevention Week or news of the Pandemic,who arranges yearly flu shots, who handles bomb scares, suicide preventions, does random drug testing and tries to beat his last timed evacuation record. He can't wait to have to call the CDC in Atlanta, the FAA, ER, SWAT,Interpol, WCB,EPA, FireRescue, Coast Guard, National Guard and any other agencies on his speed-dial. He lives to test our flashlight batteries, extinguishers, carbon monoxide detectors and the oxygen masks that he has installed over our desks, like the airlines. Don't get me wrong, we need guys like Steady Eddie, but did he have to enjoy a career based on potential tragedy so much? Although excited by the prospect of a looming calamity, he always remained cool, calm and efficient. Steady Eddie was the Master of Disaster; he was the AntiCrisis; the Apocalypse Mao; The Tragically Equipped; Genghis Yes-You-Can; Attila The Nine-One-One; Napoleon Bones-a-part; The Wizard of Gauze...Yes, he was our own Calmandant. They said he even stayed calm when the aliens abducted him one morning and took him with them to probe at will, never to get to wear his reflective safety vest and clipboard again. There's just no known drill to prevent that kind of incident!

Etymology: calm (steadiness of mind under stress;marked by freedom from agitation or excitement) & commandant (someone in an official position of authority who can command or control others)

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COMMENTS:

"Apocalypse Mao" was just too funny! Excellent. - Tigger, 2008-07-10: 02:03:00

metrohumanx CALMANDANT is cool- Steady Eddy is just the kind of take-charge guy we need ......not - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:50:00

very apt - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:37:00

Steady Eddie is indeed needed in these types of situations, - at least, he'd keep everyone laughing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:23:00

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Androitude

ohwtepph

Created by: ohwtepph

Pronunciation: AHN - droi - tyood

Sentence: No, it wasn't the crashing of a plane infested with snakes or the holdup of the diner that made Samuel L. Jackson's girlfriend go ballistic and frantically screaming for help... it was actually his androitude.

Etymology: android (a systematic cyberhuman; we all know how freakishly organized C-3PO was) + attitude (disposition)

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Floatella

AnnieChandon

Created by: AnnieChandon

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-05-10: 00:01:00
Today's definition was inspired by Cory Doctorow's short story "When Sysadmins Ruled the Earth" which is published in Overclocked, and was suggested by autophile. Thank you Cory and autophile! ~ James

nostalgia75 nostalgia75 - 2008-07-10: 13:08:00
I'm still grinning at this one. Well done!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-11-26: 00:04:00
Today's definition was suggested by doctorow. Thank you doctorow. ~ James