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'Ahhh! My hair! Don't let them see me like this!'

DEFINITION: v. To remain calm, steadfast and ploddingly systematic in the midst of a huge freaking disaster. n. A person who systematizes everything from their morning routines to personal relationships.

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Verboticisms

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Woethodical

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: woh-THOD-i-kuhl

Sentence: No matter what the crisis or meltdown at hand was, and even if it was obvious that there was little reason to believe it could be rationally managed, Bob's always took the same panickless, woethodical way of handling it, calmly uttering "She'll be right, mate."

Etymology: WOE: misfortune, calamity, anguish, tribulation, trial, wretchedness, melancholy. m-ETHODICAL: performed, disposed, or acting in a systematic way; systematic; orderly; painstaking, esp. slow and careful; deliberate

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx WOETHODICAL- Good one, Ozziebob! - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:56:00

very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:37:00

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Borgwart

Created by: serendipity9000

Pronunciation: BORG-war-t

Sentence: I was freaking out! They said we had to evacuate - but Joe was a total borgwart, kept carrying boxes of our stuff to the car until they blocked the door and forced us to drive away.

Etymology: borg (and who was more systematic than the borg) + wart (often used as suffix for person as in stalwart or worrywart)

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Zensible

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: Pronunciation: zen/si/bol

Sentence: Joe is zensible in the worst situations, remaining centered and focussed on what needs to be done to avert disaster and calmly following through.

Etymology: ZEN (calmness and enlightenment through meditation and self-contemplation) + SENSIBLE (having, using, or showing good sense, or sound judgmen)

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Calmamity

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: kaam am ittee

Sentence: his calmamity in adversity was legendary, what a pity he was such a disappopintment in bed, thought Moneypenney

Etymology: calm calamity

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COMMENTS:

great word - Jabberwocky, 2007-05-10: 12:17:00

Great concept! - jedijawa, 2007-05-11: 08:29:00

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Zentinue

Created by: Discoveria

Pronunciation: ZENN-tee-new

Sentence: Zach was unflappable. He could zentinue playing the guitar while dodging falling bricks from the collapsing roof of the stadium.

Etymology: Zen (a school of Buddhism) + continue (to keep going)

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Compunonpluss

Created by: heb319

Pronunciation: compu non plus

Sentence: As flames engulfed the building, Jack compunonplussed about to complete his filing before he escaped through the window.

Etymology: compulsive nonplussed

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Cataclystoic

Created by: verysimplegame

Pronunciation: Cat-ah-cli-stow-ik

Sentence: While the other operators shrieked and tore at their clothes at the horrifying spectacle of the flame-engulfed servers, Cliff remained strangely catacylstoic.

Etymology: Catalclysm + stoic

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Placidhead

Created by: toadstool57

Pronunciation: pla-sid-hed

Sentence: Dave had to be a placidhead because Jill was always chaotic.

Etymology: placid, acidhead

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Crisystematic

libertybelle

Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: cry-sis-tim-at-tick

Sentence: Being a trauma physician with OCD, Dr. Bank was very crisystematic; he would literally pull a flow chart out of his lab coat for each and every code blue that he worked on. You would think after 20 years of practice he would rely on his memory for some of it. True Story!!

Etymology: crisis + systematic

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COMMENTS:

libertybelle Also - this illustration made me lol this morning! - libertybelle, 2011-04-15: 07:34:00

good one! - Nosila, 2011-04-15: 11:30:00

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Calmandant

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: colm man dant

Sentence: His real name was Edward Edwards, but we called him Steady Eddie. His middle name was Danger, you just knew it. He was the Safety Officer at work. You know, the guy they have to have on staff by law, who has weekly boring meetings, who arranges first-aid classes ad nauseum, who sends out zillions of safety tips and preventative brochures. You know, the guy who loves to organize fire drills, creates emergency preparedness policies, who lives for Fire Prevention Week or news of the Pandemic,who arranges yearly flu shots, who handles bomb scares, suicide preventions, does random drug testing and tries to beat his last timed evacuation record. He can't wait to have to call the CDC in Atlanta, the FAA, ER, SWAT,Interpol, WCB,EPA, FireRescue, Coast Guard, National Guard and any other agencies on his speed-dial. He lives to test our flashlight batteries, extinguishers, carbon monoxide detectors and the oxygen masks that he has installed over our desks, like the airlines. Don't get me wrong, we need guys like Steady Eddie, but did he have to enjoy a career based on potential tragedy so much? Although excited by the prospect of a looming calamity, he always remained cool, calm and efficient. Steady Eddie was the Master of Disaster; he was the AntiCrisis; the Apocalypse Mao; The Tragically Equipped; Genghis Yes-You-Can; Attila The Nine-One-One; Napoleon Bones-a-part; The Wizard of Gauze...Yes, he was our own Calmandant. They said he even stayed calm when the aliens abducted him one morning and took him with them to probe at will, never to get to wear his reflective safety vest and clipboard again. There's just no known drill to prevent that kind of incident!

Etymology: calm (steadiness of mind under stress;marked by freedom from agitation or excitement) & commandant (someone in an official position of authority who can command or control others)

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COMMENTS:

"Apocalypse Mao" was just too funny! Excellent. - Tigger, 2008-07-10: 02:03:00

metrohumanx CALMANDANT is cool- Steady Eddy is just the kind of take-charge guy we need ......not - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:50:00

very apt - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:37:00

Steady Eddie is indeed needed in these types of situations, - at least, he'd keep everyone laughing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:23:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-05-10: 00:01:00
Today's definition was inspired by Cory Doctorow's short story "When Sysadmins Ruled the Earth" which is published in Overclocked, and was suggested by autophile. Thank you Cory and autophile! ~ James

nostalgia75 nostalgia75 - 2008-07-10: 13:08:00
I'm still grinning at this one. Well done!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-11-26: 00:04:00
Today's definition was suggested by doctorow. Thank you doctorow. ~ James