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'Ahhh! My hair! Don't let them see me like this!'

DEFINITION: v. To remain calm, steadfast and ploddingly systematic in the midst of a huge freaking disaster. n. A person who systematizes everything from their morning routines to personal relationships.

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Verboticisms

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Calmamity

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: kaam am ittee

Sentence: his calmamity in adversity was legendary, what a pity he was such a disappopintment in bed, thought Moneypenney

Etymology: calm calamity

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COMMENTS:

great word - Jabberwocky, 2007-05-10: 12:17:00

Great concept! - jedijawa, 2007-05-11: 08:29:00

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Indexhaustive

CharlieB

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: in-decks-orst-ive

Sentence: In the face of disaster, Sarah got tunnel vision. As her exasperated boyfriend pakced his suitcase to leave for a new life, she followed him round and indexhaustively rearranged the books he wasn't taking into alphabetical order.

Etymology: index (to put into order) + exhaustive (tiring out, draining) + ex (former partner or spouse)

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COMMENTS:

cute - Nosila, 2011-04-15: 11:30:00

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Calmandant

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: colm man dant

Sentence: His real name was Edward Edwards, but we called him Steady Eddie. His middle name was Danger, you just knew it. He was the Safety Officer at work. You know, the guy they have to have on staff by law, who has weekly boring meetings, who arranges first-aid classes ad nauseum, who sends out zillions of safety tips and preventative brochures. You know, the guy who loves to organize fire drills, creates emergency preparedness policies, who lives for Fire Prevention Week or news of the Pandemic,who arranges yearly flu shots, who handles bomb scares, suicide preventions, does random drug testing and tries to beat his last timed evacuation record. He can't wait to have to call the CDC in Atlanta, the FAA, ER, SWAT,Interpol, WCB,EPA, FireRescue, Coast Guard, National Guard and any other agencies on his speed-dial. He lives to test our flashlight batteries, extinguishers, carbon monoxide detectors and the oxygen masks that he has installed over our desks, like the airlines. Don't get me wrong, we need guys like Steady Eddie, but did he have to enjoy a career based on potential tragedy so much? Although excited by the prospect of a looming calamity, he always remained cool, calm and efficient. Steady Eddie was the Master of Disaster; he was the AntiCrisis; the Apocalypse Mao; The Tragically Equipped; Genghis Yes-You-Can; Attila The Nine-One-One; Napoleon Bones-a-part; The Wizard of Gauze...Yes, he was our own Calmandant. They said he even stayed calm when the aliens abducted him one morning and took him with them to probe at will, never to get to wear his reflective safety vest and clipboard again. There's just no known drill to prevent that kind of incident!

Etymology: calm (steadiness of mind under stress;marked by freedom from agitation or excitement) & commandant (someone in an official position of authority who can command or control others)

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COMMENTS:

"Apocalypse Mao" was just too funny! Excellent. - Tigger, 2008-07-10: 02:03:00

metrohumanx CALMANDANT is cool- Steady Eddy is just the kind of take-charge guy we need ......not - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:50:00

very apt - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:37:00

Steady Eddie is indeed needed in these types of situations, - at least, he'd keep everyone laughing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:23:00

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Shitcreeksurfing

Created by: katytee

Pronunciation:

Sentence: One good thing about an outbreak of the Ebola virus was that the queues at Tesco's customer service desk were always greatly reduced, thought John - who was one of life's natural shitcreeksurfers, and a bit of a pedantic git.

Etymology: To be 'up shit creek without a paddle' and take the opportunity for a spot of healthy exercise on your canoe.

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Chilloose

Created by: eiggy

Pronunciation: chill+loose

Sentence: Shirley: Oh no! Fire-breathing miniature elephants have invaded Chicago! We're doomed! Wellington: Chilloosen up, honey. There's no way Oprah would allow that kind of nonsense.

Etymology: from Latin ciele (cold) and Middle English loos (free from bonds)

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Hocusfocus

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ho/cus/fo/cus

Sentence: It was Black Monday, the stock market was crashing and with all the wild rumours, panic, hysteria and insanity trader Davis Smith was in the state of hocusfocus, buying, selling, shorting and stabilizing his clients' portfolios among the doomsdayers and panic traders.

Etymology: hocus pocus + focus

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Unrufflood

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: un/ruff/flud

Sentence: He remained completely unrufflood even when the rising waters were close to his chin

Etymology: unruffled + flood

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Floatella

AnnieChandon

Created by: AnnieChandon

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Inswerviate

Created by: rubysoho

Pronunciation: in-swerv-ee-ate

Sentence: When faced with a deadline that is complicated with challenge it is critical to not get off track. In these situations, inswerviants rise to the top. While their behavior may seem uptight on a normal day, their singlemindedness and unwillingness to swerve or deviate from a path can save the day when the heat is on.

Etymology:

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Analofile

Created by: ldikarev

Pronunciation: anal-O-file

Sentence: / We are expanding our local offices and looking for skilled, synergetic, analofiles. / Alternative spelling - analophile, analophil / Derivatives - analophilia

Etymology: anal(-retentive) + -phile (Greek - love, friendship)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-05-10: 00:01:00
Today's definition was inspired by Cory Doctorow's short story "When Sysadmins Ruled the Earth" which is published in Overclocked, and was suggested by autophile. Thank you Cory and autophile! ~ James

nostalgia75 nostalgia75 - 2008-07-10: 13:08:00
I'm still grinning at this one. Well done!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-11-26: 00:04:00
Today's definition was suggested by doctorow. Thank you doctorow. ~ James