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'Ahhh! My hair! Don't let them see me like this!'

DEFINITION: v. To remain calm, steadfast and ploddingly systematic in the midst of a huge freaking disaster. n. A person who systematizes everything from their morning routines to personal relationships.

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Verboticisms

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Femalusional

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: FEE-MUH-LOOSH-UH-NULL

Sentence: Ever since his apartment fire, James had become unsufferably FEEMALUSIONAL. He traveled with a fire extinguisher, kept a stock of bottled water in the attic, had a medical kit the size of a fooslocker, a portable degenerator and a satellite phone with GPS...yet his pandering scoutmaster attitude and hopelessly optimistic pseudocheerfulness in the face of impending disaster forced his peers to reject him like a transplanted baboon heart.

Etymology: FEMA:Federal Emergency Management Agency + DELUSIONAL:A false belief that is resistant to confrontation with actual facts.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx It can't happen here. - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:47:00

super important to read the etymology on this one metro but great blend - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:32:00

metrohumanx Hey, crew ! Check this site out: http://www.blackstump.com.au/ - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 09:36:00

Good one, metrohumanx...a woman doing what James did would be a Fema Fatale, n'est-ce pas? - Nosila, 2008-07-10: 23:13:00

love your etymology. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:16:00

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Fonzd

giveaphuk

Created by: giveaphuk

Pronunciation: FO NZ D

Sentence: I was suprised how fonzd he was, considering the disaster unfolding around him.

Etymology: Fonzd, derived from Fonzie - "Happy Days" (played by Henry Wrinkler). I got the idea from infamous diner robbery scene, aka a huge freaking disaster, in movie "Pulp Fiction" when the Samual L. Jackson is saying 'Now everyone be cool like the fonz!'

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Hystericool

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /hi-STER-i-kool/

Sentence: The whole family was going on summer vacation again — to Disney World this year — with Jane, her husband, their five kids, her in-laws and two cousins. Every year, it was Jane's job to organize the family's packing and get everyone ready to rush to the airport as soon as Jack, her husband, got home from work; and Jack was always late. With screaming kids running all around her, Jane calmly walked through the house, grabbed Grandpa Joe's medicine, Jennie's retainer, James' Game-Boy and Jill's iPod, dropped them into the appropriate suitcases while snatching a flying T-shirt out of the air and packing that too. While chaos erupted around her, Jane remained hystericool. She didn't even sweat a drop when she and Jack rode the Space Mountain ride. As the ride stopped, Jack leaned over and gave 'his Coolamity Jane' a smile and a big kiss.

Etymology: Hysterical - behavior characterized by excessive or uncontrollable emotion, such as fear or panic (from Greek, hysterikos "of the womb, suffering in the womb") + Cool - not excited; calm, especially during times of stress (from Pre-Germanic, koluz "cold, to freeze")

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx HYSTERICOOL is beautiful- and obviously based on an all-too-real personal experience. Love it! - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:58:00

great word tigger - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:33:00

Actually metro, I was thinking of the beginning of the movie 'Home Alone' and Catherine O'Hara's character when I wrote that. But anyone with that many kids to travel with ought to be a complete wreck, even if she does forget one... - Tigger, 2008-07-10: 10:54:00

I love it! And that "sentence!" We are all aspiring writers I think... :) Great read! - lumina, 2008-07-10: 18:43:00

Good one, Tigger...gives one hystericool laughter! - Nosila, 2008-07-10: 23:19:00

Another great word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:24:00

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Systemanic

Created by: jschrady

Pronunciation: (sis-ta-man-ick)

Sentence: The way he organized everything on his desk in perfect right angles labeled him as a systemanic among the OCD world.

Etymology: system- A way of defining/organizing things into appropriate sections based on preference & manic- Over the top ridiculous about something

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Hypnotwisted

Created by: heartnsoul

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Clark was so hypnotwisted in the face of adversity, Mary wanted to pull her hair out.

Etymology: hypnotist + twisted

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Calmamity

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: kalm-AM-itty

Sentence: Now matter how dire the situation or severe the emergency, Lionel always maintained an air of serene calmamity, never losing his cool and handling matters quickly and completely.

Etymology: Blend of 'calm' (Not excited or agitated; composed) and 'calamity' ( a disaster or misfortune, esp one causing extreme havoc)

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COMMENTS:

I really like this. It's clever. :) - Rhyme79, 2012-09-07: 14:38:00

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Apocalypstoicism

Trystera

Created by: Trystera

Pronunciation: "ah-POCK-uh-lips-TOE-iss-izm"

Sentence: His convertible was on fire, the killer in the backseat had a knife to his throat, and they were driving through the Rabid Grizzly Wildlife Refuge with the top down and two flat tires, but Ed merely smiled placidly and turned up the radio, his apocalypstoicism prevailing.

Etymology: Apocalypse + Stoicism

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Flusterbuster

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: fluh-stir-buh-stir

Sentence: While other spill responders were running around chaotically, I was able to flusterbuster the calm of Stuporman, knowing full well that the "white powdery substance" in the men's room was likely some guy's athlete's foot treatment.

Etymology: fluster, buster

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COMMENTS:

That has a neat sound to it! - jedijawa, 2007-05-10: 11:45:00

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Crisystematic

libertybelle

Created by: libertybelle

Pronunciation: cry-sis-tim-at-tick

Sentence: Being a trauma physician with OCD, Dr. Bank was very crisystematic; he would literally pull a flow chart out of his lab coat for each and every code blue that he worked on. You would think after 20 years of practice he would rely on his memory for some of it. True Story!!

Etymology: crisis + systematic

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COMMENTS:

libertybelle Also - this illustration made me lol this morning! - libertybelle, 2011-04-15: 07:34:00

good one! - Nosila, 2011-04-15: 11:30:00

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Browniechannelize

Created by: cohenarie

Pronunciation: brow ne CHAN el iz

Sentence: As liquid began to flood from the clogged restaurant toilet, I browniechannelized - stepping carefully out of the bathroom, to avoid soiling my shoes, I passed the problem on to a waitress, indicating that "someone might need to check the women's restroom."

Etymology: "Yer doing a great job, Brownie." I focused on the 'plodding' aspect of the definition (and the absense of any indication that the reaction was effective or appropriate.)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-05-10: 00:01:00
Today's definition was inspired by Cory Doctorow's short story "When Sysadmins Ruled the Earth" which is published in Overclocked, and was suggested by autophile. Thank you Cory and autophile! ~ James

nostalgia75 nostalgia75 - 2008-07-10: 13:08:00
I'm still grinning at this one. Well done!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-11-26: 00:04:00
Today's definition was suggested by doctorow. Thank you doctorow. ~ James