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'Ahhh! My hair! Don't let them see me like this!'

DEFINITION: v. To remain calm, steadfast and ploddingly systematic in the midst of a huge freaking disaster. n. A person who systematizes everything from their morning routines to personal relationships.

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Verboticisms

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Freason

mishmish

Created by: mishmish

Pronunciation:

Sentence: I get so excited when I'm in front of all these people, but she just freasons.

Etymology: Freeze + reason

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Shitcreeksurfing

Created by: katytee

Pronunciation:

Sentence: One good thing about an outbreak of the Ebola virus was that the queues at Tesco's customer service desk were always greatly reduced, thought John - who was one of life's natural shitcreeksurfers, and a bit of a pedantic git.

Etymology: To be 'up shit creek without a paddle' and take the opportunity for a spot of healthy exercise on your canoe.

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Steadyeddy

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sted dee ed dee

Sentence: When Ed Dodds was faced with flooded streets in his hometown, after tornadoes and torrential rains, he remained calm and helped his neighbours. He organized boats to help steadyeddy them to higher ground and safety and kept up their spirits. He would have been eligible for a some kind of hero award, had he and his boat not ended up being beamed into a passing UFO spacecraft.Now his neighbours all call out to the skies, "E.D., phone home".

Etymology: Steady (steadfast, calm, reliable) & Eddy (swirling whirlpool or whirlwind and a guy's name)

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Catastaunch

Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /kəˈtæˌstɔːntʃ/

Sentence: When calamity strikes, it's often surprising to see who steps up to catastaunch the flow of disaster; it's not always whom you expect.

Etymology: from catastrophe + staunch (meaning both "steadfast" and "to stop the flow of")

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Borgwart

Created by: serendipity9000

Pronunciation: BORG-war-t

Sentence: I was freaking out! They said we had to evacuate - but Joe was a total borgwart, kept carrying boxes of our stuff to the car until they blocked the door and forced us to drive away.

Etymology: borg (and who was more systematic than the borg) + wart (often used as suffix for person as in stalwart or worrywart)

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Calmamity

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: kalm-AM-itty

Sentence: Now matter how dire the situation or severe the emergency, Lionel always maintained an air of serene calmamity, never losing his cool and handling matters quickly and completely.

Etymology: Blend of 'calm' (Not excited or agitated; composed) and 'calamity' ( a disaster or misfortune, esp one causing extreme havoc)

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COMMENTS:

I really like this. It's clever. :) - Rhyme79, 2012-09-07: 14:38:00

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Zencompetent

Created by: benjamin

Pronunciation: rhymes with "incompetent"

Sentence: Sarah zencompetantly rounded up the 73 monkeys that had escaped from their cages; not a single one was injured, and Sarah avoided all of the flug poop.

Etymology: zen (calm, state of peace) + competent (competent)

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Steadphased

Created by: fredini

Pronunciation: Stead-Phased

Sentence: Despite the massive denial of service attack and calls from the CFO, the sys-admin remained steadphased as he rebooted the server.

Etymology: Steadfast +Phased

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Staotic

Created by: ekath

Pronunciation: stay-ot-tick

Sentence: Todd is so staotic that he didn't even cry out when the acid splashed in his face... he just calmly went over and pulled the safety shower. When it fire-hosed him into the ground, he shakily stood up and asked to go to the nurse's office. Carol should have been more like Todd.

Etymology: from stable + chaotic

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Disafearance

Created by: lumina

Pronunciation: dis/a/feer/ance

Sentence: When Julie found herself on an emergency Walmart run at 2 in the morning, she was glad she had mastered disafearance. No way did she want her ex and his model girlfriend to know how humiliated she was to be seen in her holey sweats as well as braless.

Etymology: the ability to "disappear" from the siight of others due to intense "fear" of being seen.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx DISAFEARANCE needed in a brave new world... - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 20:54:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-05-10: 00:01:00
Today's definition was inspired by Cory Doctorow's short story "When Sysadmins Ruled the Earth" which is published in Overclocked, and was suggested by autophile. Thank you Cory and autophile! ~ James

nostalgia75 nostalgia75 - 2008-07-10: 13:08:00
I'm still grinning at this one. Well done!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-11-26: 00:04:00
Today's definition was suggested by doctorow. Thank you doctorow. ~ James