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'Ahhh! My hair! Don't let them see me like this!'

DEFINITION: v. To remain calm, steadfast and ploddingly systematic in the midst of a huge freaking disaster. n. A person who systematizes everything from their morning routines to personal relationships.

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Verboticisms

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Apocalypstoicism

Trystera

Created by: Trystera

Pronunciation: "ah-POCK-uh-lips-TOE-iss-izm"

Sentence: His convertible was on fire, the killer in the backseat had a knife to his throat, and they were driving through the Rabid Grizzly Wildlife Refuge with the top down and two flat tires, but Ed merely smiled placidly and turned up the radio, his apocalypstoicism prevailing.

Etymology: Apocalypse + Stoicism

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Shitcreeksurfing

Created by: katytee

Pronunciation:

Sentence: One good thing about an outbreak of the Ebola virus was that the queues at Tesco's customer service desk were always greatly reduced, thought John - who was one of life's natural shitcreeksurfers, and a bit of a pedantic git.

Etymology: To be 'up shit creek without a paddle' and take the opportunity for a spot of healthy exercise on your canoe.

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Unrufflood

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: un/ruff/flud

Sentence: He remained completely unrufflood even when the rising waters were close to his chin

Etymology: unruffled + flood

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Unrufflood

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: un/ruff/flud

Sentence: He remained completely unrufflood even when the rising waters were close to his chin

Etymology: unruffled + flood

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Calmageddon

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Kalm-a-ged-don

Sentence: When a fire broke out in the office, the normally shy and retiring Harry really showed his calmageddon side, he organised everyone into single file and led them calmly out of the building whilst telling awful jokes that made them almost forget the peril they were in.

Etymology: Calm (peaceful and undisturbed, make or become tranquil or quiet) + Armageddon ( catastrophic conflict). (see also 1998 disaster movie) = Calmageddon

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx CALMAGEDDON- nice. Very juxtapositional. - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:54:00

great etymology - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:28:00

Great word AND "sentence." :) - lumina, 2008-07-10: 18:41:00

Another terrific word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-13: 18:09:00

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Hypnotwisted

Created by: heartnsoul

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Clark was so hypnotwisted in the face of adversity, Mary wanted to pull her hair out.

Etymology: hypnotist + twisted

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Placidifize

Created by: daisy

Pronunciation: pla-si-di-fize

Sentence: Don't placidifize me, with those pictures on the internet, I will never be president!

Etymology:

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Unrufflood

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: un/ruff/flud

Sentence: He remained completely unrufflood even when the rising waters were close to his chin.

Etymology: unruffled + flood

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx UNRUFFLOOD- a very fluid interpretation, mon! - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:48:00

Nice flow about it. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:12:00

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Calmandant

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: colm man dant

Sentence: His real name was Edward Edwards, but we called him Steady Eddie. His middle name was Danger, you just knew it. He was the Safety Officer at work. You know, the guy they have to have on staff by law, who has weekly boring meetings, who arranges first-aid classes ad nauseum, who sends out zillions of safety tips and preventative brochures. You know, the guy who loves to organize fire drills, creates emergency preparedness policies, who lives for Fire Prevention Week or news of the Pandemic,who arranges yearly flu shots, who handles bomb scares, suicide preventions, does random drug testing and tries to beat his last timed evacuation record. He can't wait to have to call the CDC in Atlanta, the FAA, ER, SWAT,Interpol, WCB,EPA, FireRescue, Coast Guard, National Guard and any other agencies on his speed-dial. He lives to test our flashlight batteries, extinguishers, carbon monoxide detectors and the oxygen masks that he has installed over our desks, like the airlines. Don't get me wrong, we need guys like Steady Eddie, but did he have to enjoy a career based on potential tragedy so much? Although excited by the prospect of a looming calamity, he always remained cool, calm and efficient. Steady Eddie was the Master of Disaster; he was the AntiCrisis; the Apocalypse Mao; The Tragically Equipped; Genghis Yes-You-Can; Attila The Nine-One-One; Napoleon Bones-a-part; The Wizard of Gauze...Yes, he was our own Calmandant. They said he even stayed calm when the aliens abducted him one morning and took him with them to probe at will, never to get to wear his reflective safety vest and clipboard again. There's just no known drill to prevent that kind of incident!

Etymology: calm (steadiness of mind under stress;marked by freedom from agitation or excitement) & commandant (someone in an official position of authority who can command or control others)

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COMMENTS:

"Apocalypse Mao" was just too funny! Excellent. - Tigger, 2008-07-10: 02:03:00

metrohumanx CALMANDANT is cool- Steady Eddy is just the kind of take-charge guy we need ......not - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:50:00

very apt - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:37:00

Steady Eddie is indeed needed in these types of situations, - at least, he'd keep everyone laughing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:23:00

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Turtaculous

Created by: vetmommy2

Pronunciation: turr-tack-you-luss

Sentence: The preacher's remarkable focus on his sermon was turtaculous in the midst of the absolute spectacle created when the bewildered and astonished parents of the streaking toddler ran after her up the aisle of the overcrowded and sweltering church. (OK, this didn't actually happen, but easily could have when my toddler removed all her clothes in the cry room at church a few weekends ago and then grabbed the doorknob to let herself out...)

Etymology: turtle + spectacular + fabulous: imagining a turtle pulling its head and stuff into its shell as the mad world goes racing and clamoring past it...

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COMMENTS:

Very interesting:love the "turtle" element. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:13:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-05-10: 00:01:00
Today's definition was inspired by Cory Doctorow's short story "When Sysadmins Ruled the Earth" which is published in Overclocked, and was suggested by autophile. Thank you Cory and autophile! ~ James

nostalgia75 nostalgia75 - 2008-07-10: 13:08:00
I'm still grinning at this one. Well done!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-11-26: 00:04:00
Today's definition was suggested by doctorow. Thank you doctorow. ~ James