Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A type of frustration created by a manager who never notices when you work late, but always nags you for leaving early whenever you leave on time. v. To carefully monitor your subordinates to ensure that they never leave work a minute early.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Hourgrass
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: our/grass
Sentence: Stan was the company hourgrass and would tattle on anyone who took a minute longer for coffee breaks or lunch. He had a special alarm that would sound if the door was opened before 5:00 p.m.
Etymology: hour glass + grass (as in tattle)
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COMMENTS:
Stan sounds like a grasshole! - Nosila, 2009-06-16: 10:48:00
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Latekeeper
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: lātkēpər
Sentence: The rule at Jill’s office is to calculate time cards in 15-minute increments. What that often means is that her boss, will engage her in a conversation for 14 minutes past her scheduled work day. The other trick that this latekeeper will employ is to wait until he hears the click of the time clock to exit his office to ask for a progress report on her various projects.
Etymology: late (doing something or taking place after the expected, proper, or usual time) + gatekeeper (a person or thing that controls access to something)
Obeywatch
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: o bay weatch
Sentence: Mr.Smedley fancied himself a dedicated disciple of the obeywatch old school of management. He decided that those employees who had the misfortune to report to him were not to be trusted with important things like personal time management. Far too often they let their personal lives get in the way of being at work. Imagine calling in sick and failing to come in just because you broke a leg or had minor surgery, like an appendicitis. Where was the loyalty these days? So what if there were days they worked for 12 hours straight and other days when the work flow slowed down? He still expected them to be there 9 to 5, without exception. He positioned his desk near the time clocks, so no one could sneak out past him. He recorded all these indiscretions in a black book. Needless to say, morale was at an all time low and fuses were getting shorter at such treatment. One of these days, someone would go postal and punch out his time clock permanently!
Etymology: obey (be obedient to) & watch (a purposeful surveillance to guard or observe;a small portable timepiece;a person employed to watch for something to happen) & Baywatch(you know,that show, where Hoff says, "Hey we gotta save that guy!" and Pamela goes boing, boing, boing running down the beach after him carrying that red thing...)
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COMMENTS:
That's hard to beat - petaj, 2008-04-23: 02:50:00
I guess the "mean" in 'GMT' meant everything to him! Very clever. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-04-23: 06:25:00
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Ticcompoop
Created by: jrogan
Pronunciation: tik-com-poop
Sentence: My boss is a real ticcompoop. He even has a ticcompooter to calculate how may seconds we spend in the washroom.
Etymology: tick + nimcompoop
Drachronian
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: drey-KROH-nee-uhn
Sentence: "Time is money" yelled Bob so often at his long-suffering staff, that all were finally diagnosed as suffering from drachronian's syndrome, and placed indefinitely on tick leave.
Etymology: Blend of DRACO of draconian fame: Athenian lawgiver who mandated death as punishment for even minor crimes. Fig: severe, inflexible, ruthless. CHRONO, Gk meaning time, as in chronology. DRACULA: ogre, terror, bugbear. IA: suffix meaning disease, state, condition.
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COMMENTS:
funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-23: 08:56:00
Perfect! - ErWenn, 2008-04-23: 09:49:00
I like the 'chrono' inflection...great word. - Mustang, 2008-04-23: 21:57:00
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Clockants
Created by: arrrteest
Pronunciation: klok-ants
Sentence: Angie had been working late for the past few weeks without any complaint or second thought. That is, until she had to leave on time to get home to fix dinner for her fiance's parents. She was clockant as she tip-toed past her boss's office. Breathing a sigh of relief when she cleared the doorway, she looked up and he was right in front of her. "Leaving, are you?" he said in a snooty voice. She pretended not to hear him and slipped out the door.
Etymology: clock, a device for noting the time + ant
Clockjock
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: klok jok
Sentence: Hal was a clockjock. He eyed his staff like a hungry lion at a zebra watering hole. If they tried to sneak away early, he'd confront them to the point, they'd never do it again. One day, young Mindy raced to the door to escape and was caught by Hal. "Where do you think you are going?" he charged. "My water broke and I need to get to hospital." she cried. "Nice try", he countered. "You've been here long enough to know that all deliveries are made at the rear of the building, after 6:00 p.m.".
Etymology: Clock (a timepiece that shows the time of day) & Jock (a person trained to compete)
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COMMENTS:
"...deliveries are made at the rear of the building, after 6:00 p.m." - HA - priceless
- karenanne, 2010-06-29: 19:43:00
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Timebeing
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: tīmbēing
Sentence: Tom works for the timebeing. That timebeing is his boss. It doesn't seem to matter how much he gets done or that he arrives early and skips lunch, closing time is closing time. Tom and his boss do a mental minute waltz as 5 o'clock approaches. The fact that the boss's office is aligned with the hallway Tom uses for his escape makes him seem something like a troll guarding a bridge.
Etymology: time (the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future) + being (a real or imaginary living creature)
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COMMENTS:
very cerebral - bookowl, 2009-06-16: 16:46:00
creepy - mrskellyscl, 2009-06-16: 16:55:00
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Bossitch
Created by: abrakadeborah
Pronunciation: bos-itch
Sentence: Mr. Needler Nosey was such a bositch to his employees and only noticed what he presumed was bad behavior.
Etymology: Boss- A person in charge of the company employees. *itch- Slang for a person who complains about everything.
Timestapo
Created by: youmustvotenato
Pronunciation: time-stop-po
Sentence: Michael, the manager, immediately asked why I was walking out the door at 4:58. Of course, the TIMESTAPO don't understand that when your work is complete and your computer is shut down that its pointless to sit around twittling thumbs.
Etymology: time stamp + gestapo
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
stache - 2008-04-23: 22:10:00
slackervisor looks a little like hank hill.
daniellegeorge - 2008-04-24: 13:17:00
clockblock is genius
- 2008-07-27: 19:30:00
nice words
bob - 2008-07-27: 22:57:00
nice stuff!
wordmeister - 2008-07-27: 23:43:00
Timely words today
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Where is everybody today? Vacations galore?
monkey88 - 2011-11-18: 01:36:00