Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: luv loynd

Sentence: Nothing was sadder than Elsie and Bessie,the Bovine Sisters, a pair of loveloined heifers. Their success at attracting true love was terribull...there had been no chance of oxtasy for them. They were always steered in the wrong direction and although they played the field, literally, they were never stampeded by suitors. They decided to join an on-loin dating service on their cowmputers. They only had one beef with this service, it was udderly impossibull to find a young stud who told the truth and did not shoot the bull. These mavericks were always born a "Taurus", owned their own spread and would love to be a fodder. Their names turned out not to be Angus or Delmonico, but Chuck or Stew. Any success the sisters had with this service was strictly oxcidental. When she herd what they had done, their mother had warned them that Internet dating always ended in steers.

Etymology: lovelorn (unhappy in love; suffering from unrequited love) & loin (a cut of meat taken from the side and back of an animal between the ribs and the rump)

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COMMENTS:

Udderly Puntastic! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:26:00

Gives a whole new meaning to beefcake! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:37:00

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Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: chair-ub

Sentence: Cupid's arrow had struck her, right through the heart. From now on there was only one serial killer for her and it was Ivan. His scarred shaven head and crazy eyes made her weak at the knees. She was his chairub and she fought hard to save him from the chair, despite the 11 witnesses who saw his axe wielding escapade. Her scented love letters were the last thing he would read, before his eyeballs boiled and exploded from the 2000 volt current that would pass through his oddly shaped head.

Etymology: 1.cherub - an angelic baby eg Cupid the Roman God of erotic love. 2. chair (electric) - a device used for capital punishment for the most heinous crimes.

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COMMENTS:

Clever! Also plays on RUB, meaning difficulty or dilemma.. - readerwriter, 2009-02-11: 10:30:00

Electtrifying! Shocking! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:41:00

What a sentence! Too bad it couldn't have been commuted...where is that Governor when you need him? - Nosila, 2009-02-14: 23:19:00

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Created by: hyperborean

Pronunciation: rome-ee-oh

Sentence: He was getting lots of action, but couldn't find a nice girl to settle down with him. Could it be he was a roameo? He still hoped to hear wedding bells when he took that thirteenth step at Sex Addicts Anonymous.

Etymology: Romeo (Shakespeare's doomed lover) + roam (to go from place to place without purpose or direction.)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hef er aft er

Sentence: It was obvious that Madge and Dodie were heiferafter in their search for true love. They were steered in the direction of a meet market and met two young longhorns oxendentally,who were bovine, but uninterested in getting yoked.

Etymology: Heifer (young cow) & Everafter (from here to Eternity)

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Created by: spotter

Pronunciation: Con cue pid

Sentence: Rick was concupid looking for love in the pharmacy. Marta said, "Suzy is so concupid."

Etymology: Con=Anti; Against Cupid= A symbol of love Therefor; Against a symbol of love

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Created by: Meganja

Pronunciation: a-or-tuh-tard

Sentence: Stop being a douchey, terrible judging AORTATARD and listen to your brain when it comes to falling in love.

Etymology:

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Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: wood/wooed louse sited

Sentence: Honey Bunny looked on-yon world wide web for love. She searched walla to walla for a sweet one. Vid Alia, turned out to be a gorgin'. Chives was a bit too green. Sal Ad was a bit too red. Maui was a bit too far away. French Fryde turned yellow and ran away. So many were Rap Scallions. Honey Bunny finally realized, looking for love on the endearnet, oops, I mean the interknot, was very wooedlousesited!

Etymology: WOOED, LOUSE is a play on woodlouse. SIGHT/SITE. Wooed - actions taken when looking for love. Louse - undesirable bug, also slang for an undesiraable man. Sight - to use the eyes to look and see. Site - internet locations/domains. ..................... 'on yon' is another way to say onion. Now the following word plays on the names of onions might make better sense.

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COMMENTS:

This week I seem to have a wiled hare ..... everyday. - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 02:46:00

thyme is a great healer - galwaywegian, 2009-02-11: 04:31:00

I think you're having too much fun with this. :) - kateinkorea, 2009-02-11: 09:40:00

I keep thinking of Easter instead of Valentine's Day - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-11: 10:43:00

Thanks for spicing it up a notch, galwaywegian. You are absolutely right, kateinkorea. Oh, Jabberwocky, so am I! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:26:00

Your story has apeel, oh Lady of Shallot! It made my eyes leek. - Nosila, 2009-02-12: 00:35:00

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: Waylon Jennings

Sentence: After checking out the refuse collection station, the palliative care hostel and the bipolar support group for potential partners, Stephen finally joined Wailinjennings Anonymous, where ironically he met a sweet girl. They fell in love and were promptly kicked out because their change of demeanour was anathema to the other miserable members.

Etymology: Waylon Jennings - country singer who was "lookin for love in all the wrong places" + wailing (crying or singing plaintively)

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COMMENTS:

Great song and verbotomy! You have a humringer here! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 12:19:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: BLUN-der-lust

Sentence: Heloise once again found herself suffering the pangs of failed blunderlust, looking for love in all the wrong places and for all the wrong reasons, and feeling used, abused and definitely discarded....and of course, vowing once again to never go that route again.

Etymology: Blend of blunder and lust, and a play on the word 'wanderlust'...(a strong, innate desire to rove or travel about)

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COMMENTS:

At one time or another, doesn't everyone go through a case of blunderlust? Unforgettably good! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 12:14:00

Enjoyed this perfect blend of blunder and lust. - mweinmann, 2009-02-12: 09:10:00

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: lew - sur - chooz - ur

Sentence: Margie was starting to think of herself as a loserchooser. Over and over, she would have a magical evening where she thought she had met the person of her dreams. Pretty quickly she would realize that he was a total loser.

Etymology: Loser + Chooser >> Loser (One that is bad in quality) Chooser (picker: a person who chooses or selects out)

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COMMENTS:

rolls right off the tongue, meaning apparent, memorable, might fine rhymetime verbotomy. - silveryaspen, 2009-02-11: 11:39:00

funny! - splendiction, 2009-02-11: 16:01:00

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