Vote for the best verboticism.

'Computer programmers do not make mistakes.'

DEFINITION: n. A computer programmer who corrects software problems by bugging the users, rather than debugging the software. v. To pinpoint the blame for any defects in a product, especially a software product which you have created, on "illogical" end-users.

Create | Read

Verboticisms

Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...

You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.

Proctechnalgia

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: PROK-tek-nel-juh

Sentence: Bob, aka Cranston, was a technillogicrat whose proctechnalgia was the bane of all IT end-users.

Etymology: Blend of TECHNOLOGY, PROgram & PROCTALGIA:a pain in the ass.

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

Blend of TECHNOLOGY & PROCTALGIA:a pain in the ass. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-14: 17:41:00

Oops! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-14: 17:42:00

funny - you must have put this in very late - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-14: 21:04:00

----------------------------

| Comments and Points

Dikoder

Kallystie

Created by: Kallystie

Pronunciation: dik-oder

Sentence: Richard was berating Sally for crashing his flawless program. She insisted that it was not user-error, and that there had to be an issue with the code. He continued to be petulant, and finally Sally said, "Hey, stop being such a dikoder Richard!"

Etymology: Possibly a combination of British army slang for "male appendage" circa 1891 and the latin "codex", or book of laws.

| Comments and Points

Nincomputable

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: nin/com/pute/abul

Sentence: Our IT department always makes me feel like a nincomputable.

Etymology: nincompoop + computable

| Comments and Points

Pogrommer

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: poe grom mer

Sentence: Gerd the Nerd, King of the Keys, WiFi Art Thou was on his usual grumpy morning rounds. It was always demeaning for a man of his superior intellect and obvious supreme being status to have to help the peons in data entry sort their miniscule problems. And so he conducted his morning pogrommer act, successfully designed to terrify and cower. But when he deigned to enter the murky waters of the call centre, he was blinded by the beauty of the end-user. She had long gold plaits and looked so helpless and vulnerable, so he went gently on her. He found himself thinking of her all day and dreamed that night that his Big Fat Geek Wedding would soon be a reality.

Etymology: Pogrom (organized persecution of an ethnic group, in this case, blonde end-users) & Programmer (a person who designs and writes and tests computer programs)

| Comments and Points

Mistech

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: mis tek

Sentence: Lech, our mistech, mistook a mistake that Missy would make. He would make her shake and quake, about her mistake, even when his take of her mistake was a flake. He could wreck the heck on her neck, if he we didn't keep our mistech in check.

Etymology: Mistake (error) & Tech (a technician who is highly proficient and enthusiastic about some technical field (especially computing)

| Comments and Points

Notit

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: nätit

Sentence: Whenever a computer problem is exposed Wendel sings out "Notit" much like a kid at the start of a game of tag. Of course when he said "it", he meant IT. Though he has never actually created a single usable document, spreadsheet or database, he just knows that any problem that pops up is the fault of the peons that work for his company. If only he could keep these knuckleheads from monkeying with his network... He would express his disdain in an e-mail if he could spell it.

Etymology: not (used with an auxiliary verb or “be” to form the negative) + it (pronoun [third person singular]) IT (Information Technology)

| Comments and Points

Computerpogromer

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kom pew ter po grom er

Sentence: Ivan the Terrible was the scourge of the Company because he ran his own personal little empire in the IT Dept. He terrorized the quasi-technical employees and carried out a reign of terror as a computerpogromer to the masses, making them fear turning on their computers each morning. Like all despots though, he was overthrown when the company outsourced his job overseas, in an effort to save money and lives.

Etymology: Computer Programmer (a person who designs and writes and tests computer programs)& Pogrom (organized persecution of an ethnic group (especially Jews)

| Comments and Points

Softwarespecialass

Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: soft ware spesh ial ass

Sentence: Hank's new income tax software’s many glitches prompted him to call technical support. However, the softwarespecialass maintained his program was flawless. He suggested Hank give the software another try while completing another random task, such as juggling oranges or counting sheep.

Etymology: From software specialist and ass.

| Comments and Points

Progcastigator

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: prog/cass/ti/gay/tor

Sentence: Many software developers are progcastigators who put off reworking their programs and instead berate users.

Etymology: programmer + castigate (reprimand, berate) + procrastinator

| Comments and Points

Technillogicrat

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: tech - nil - LODJ - uh - crat

Sentence: Having an overblown ego and chutzpah to match, Cranston was a technillogicrat in the extreme who would never admit ignorance but would always blame everyone and everything else for things he could not remedy.

Etymology: Blend of technical and illogic with suffix -crat...member of a dominant class

----------------------------
COMMENTS:

great blend - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-14: 14:05:00

There's a theme here, apparently we have all worked with these types... - Nosila, 2008-05-15: 01:53:00

----------------------------

| Comments and Points

Show All or More...

 

Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-05-14: 00:03:02
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-06-26: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James

Svetikreink - 2019-07-19: 00:18:00
https://msetka.ru/forum/user/4149/ http://lablife.ru/forum/user/75853/ http://www.grepharm.ru/forum/index.php?PAGE_NAME=profile_view&UID=8920 http:

Petrikreink - 2019-07-19: 01:34:00
http://www.photorange.ru/forum/index.php?PAGE_NAME=profile_view&UID=21467 http://p-v.by/forum/user/10610/ http://harmonyl.ru/forum/index.php?PAGE_NA

Genkareink - 2019-07-19: 06:07:00
http://vozrplus.ru/communication/forum/user/1072/ http://romantikgdk.m-sk.ru/node?page=1&destination=node%3FPAGE_NAME%3Dprofi

Svetikreink - 2019-07-19: 06:44:00
https://nightwolves.ru/nw/content/forum/user/1/?PAGE_NAME=profile_view&UID=18400&SECTION_CODE=nw%2Fcontent&user%2F1%2F%3Fregister=yes&user%2F

Petrikreink - 2019-07-19: 07:59:00
https://nightwolves.ru/nw/forum/user/1/?PAGE_NAME=profile_view&UID=18659&SECTION_CODE=nw&user%2F1%2F%3Fregister=yes&user%2F1%2F%3FSECTION_COD

Genkareink - 2019-07-19: 15:15:00
http://www.nvkb.ru/forum/index.php?PAGE_NAME=profile_view&UID=8507 http://ivanovo-diving.ru/forum/?PAGE_NAME=profile_view&UID

Svetikreink - 2019-07-19: 15:51:00
http://xn----dtbhojfkaie8g3b.xn--p1ai/nw/company/forum/user/1/?PAGE_NAME=profile_view&UID=18148&SECTION_CODE=nw%2Fcompany&user%2F1%2F%3Fregis

Petrikreink - 2019-07-19: 17:02:00
http://stroller-be.ru/forum/?PAGE_NAME=profile_view&UID=17920 https://akb-oil.ru/communication/forum/user/1260/

Genkareink - 2019-07-19: 23:59:00
http://ruscigars.ru/forum/?PAGE_NAME=profile_view&UID=6104 http://goldenfiber.ru/forum/index.php?PAGE_NAME=profile_view&UID=2