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DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.
Verboticisms
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Prostagrabgab
Created by: aayeye
Pronunciation: prŏs'tĭ-'grăb-găb
Sentence: Dr. Stinky would not shut up during my prostate exam. He definately has the gift of prostagrabgab.
Etymology: Postate+grab= prostate exam gab= chit chat during said exam
Zideronker
Created by: Nickvoreas
Pronunciation: Zid-er-onk-er
Sentence: the zideronkerist dentist continued to talk to her patient even while she stuffed his mouth full of tools.
Etymology:
Chatquilizer
Created by: rikboyee
Pronunciation: chat-kwil-eye-zer
Sentence: she had become quite adept at chatquilizing her patients
Etymology: chat, tranquilizer
Medigab
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: med/i/gab
Sentence: Dentist's medigab is designed to move the patient's attention past the procedure so they will be somewhat more relaxed.
Etymology: MEDIGAB - noun - from - MEDICAL + GAB
Faqsdicine
Created by: vmalcolm
Pronunciation: /fæksdsin/
Sentence: While she was attending him, she engaged in a little faqsdicine to relax him a bit.
Etymology: FAQSDICINE. From FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions) + Medicine (the science which relates to the prevention, cure, or alleviation of disease)
Yackattack
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: YAK-uh-tak
Sentence: When Bertrand went in for his dental appointments he knew he was going to be bombarded with a yackattack from the dentist who never seemed to run out of inane questions and commments.
Etymology: Blend of 'yack' (Prolonged, sometimes senseless talk; chatter) and 'attack' (to set about (a task) or go to work on (a thing) vigorously)
Awkwords
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: awk-werds
Sentence: Jim is not a fan of dental appointments, not because of a concern for pain or the loss of productive time. What he hates is the awkwords that fill the room as the procedures progress. It's difficult, at best, to carry on a conversation with fingers, water spray and other tools in your mouth.
Etymology: awkward (lacking social graces or manners) + words (speech or talk)
Jabwitter
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Jabb-wit-er
Sentence: Dr B. Kindly always resorted to the tried and tested method of jabwitter to put his patients at ease while injecting them. He would ask them trivial questions, such as, where they were going for their holiday or what they intended to have for lunch to distract their attention away from the pain. After twenty years in the profession he found this was the best tactic to use on most people.
Etymology: Jab(a hypodermic injection) + Witter(to speak about trivial matters) = Jabwitter
Communicache
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kom myun i kayke
Sentence: Every time Eddy went to see his Dentist, Dr.Iva Payne, he had to endure their usual communicache exchange. She would communicate with him inane questions about the weather, politics and his family and he would endure the ache. He honestly did not know how she understood him, but after years of doing this, she could understand the answers of her victims, er patients.
Etymology: Communicate (transmit thoughts or feelings or information) & Ache (pain)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James
OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James
lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology
lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James