Verboticisms

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: stellth-food

Sentence: The scale gave a small muffled electronic scream when Andy brought his full weight to bear. He was just about done with trying to shape up; two weeks of treadmill and proper diet had led to a 5-pound gain. Unfortunately, Andy had been mistaken in his meal-selecting logic, and all of the sensible meals he had recently consumed were in fact stealthfoods. The 8-oz portion of fish the night before, for example, had come from an Eastern Stoned Lardwrasse. After a lazy afternoon on the reef smoking reefer, the fish had consumed a bag of Funyuns, 3 Big Macs, 2 orders of fries, a chocolate shake, and a carton of Haagen Daazs. Leaving his friends laughing in his enormous wake, calling him names like "Marlin Brando", the lardwrasse had groggily stumbled into a waiting net, his certain doom, and another veneer of fat on Andy's barely denim-constrained buttocks.

Etymology: stealth + food; ala healthfood

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COMMENTS:

What a witty twist to come up with an eat-it-self-to-death fish that packs weight on humans! Topped off with a meaning full great pun! Excellent Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:06:00

Now I know why I almost bought that bag of Bloomin' Onion Crisps at the store tonight. Bastard Banky! (Sorry James!) Nice word! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-19: 20:55:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fridj a men

Sentence: Martin was on a strict fridgimen to change his eating habits and body shape. Six times a day, he would vigorously stride (a cardio pulmonary exercise) to his refrigerator, open and close the door twenty times (to get a good upper body workout) and then bend over to get a beer from the bottom or reach up into the freezer to get an iced beer mug or ice cream treat (stretching exercises). He might also reach far into the back of the fridge (more stretching) to get cold fried chicken or lemon meringue pie out to eat. His theory was that if the food was cold, his body would have to burn more calories to warm it up so that he could digest it. Yes, his fridgimen was a good thermal workout and yet despite his fine muscle tone (for a 300 pound man) he never seemed to lose any weight. He just put it down to the fact that muscle weighed more than fat...

Etymology: Fridge (nickname for a refrigerator in which the coolant is pumped around by an electric motor, designed to keep foods cold) & Regimen ((medicine) a systematic plan for therapy (often including diet)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kou-uhs-then-iks

Sentence: Roger goes to the gym on a regular basis. What he calls a workout rarely involves much work. His cowisthenics usually involve hoofing it to the closest vending machine for an "energy" drink and "health" bar. On a really energetic visit he might be moooved to join a short basketball game, take a quick shower and herd for the donut shop on his way home to replenish all those expended carbs.

Etymology: cow (a mature bovine) + calisthenics (gymnastic exercises designed to develop physical health and vigor)

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: nin-jewels

Sentence: Dear Lord, "So grant me strength that I may not fall, Into the clutches of cholesterol. May my flesh with carrot curls be sated That my soul may be polyunsaturated. And show me the light that I may bear witness To the President's Council on Physical Fitness." Deliver us from ninjoules so those sneaky pounds won't make us fools. Amen Quoted section by Victor Buono "The fat man's prayer" -- http://www.themadmusicarchive.com/song_details.aspx?SongID=3657.

Etymology: ninja (practitioners of japanese espionage, characterised by stealth) + joules (units of energy, that are easily converted into adipose tissue by the unsuspecting couch potato)

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COMMENTS:

Great fat man's prayer! Great Word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 09:58:00

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Created by: paperhoard

Pronunciation: Fatty-mo-sis

Sentence: Jim seems to gain weight by simply having fatty food near his paunch. Scientifically this process is called fattimosis, fat traveling from one area to another directly through the paunch layer. Jim is now at the point where he can butter his bread simply by rubbing it across his stomach.

Etymology: Fatty + Osmosis

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COMMENTS:

Great last line ... Great Verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:46:00

very funny - bookowl, 2008-03-19: 14:23:00

Thank you! - paperhoard, 2008-03-19: 14:46:00

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Created by: catgrin

Pronunciation: ant-il-yuh n (sounds like "ant" + "million" -"m")

Sentence: (n) No amount of hours at the gym could stop the antileans from taking oven my waistline. (v) By 35, most women antilean, diet and exercise simply cannot return them to their size fours.

Etymology: A simple compound of "anti" and "lean" using a softer vowel sounds and slightly shifted emphasis to give the sound of tiny hordes attacking.

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Created by: Soyabaa96

Pronunciation: Fat so` ish man ism

Sentence: I have a horrible case of Fatsoishmanism

Etymology:

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Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: eh-nig-mass

Sentence: All those 100-calorie snack packs were ineffective in helping George lose weight. Each day when he got on the scale, there it was - more enigmass.

Etymology: enigma, mass, ass

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COMMENTS:

Excellent verboticism. George has massive issues to deal with. He probably has indigestion too. ;-) - Mustang, 2008-03-19: 06:45:00

lol - Superb etymology and word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:12:00

another good one - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-19: 11:47:00

Short & sweet - or, perhaps, I should say: fat & sweet! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-19: 16:34:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kil ler gramz

Sentence: Melanie had tried everything to lose a few pounds, like Weight Watchers, Nutrisystem, Jenny Craig, Atkins, LA Weight Loss, Herbal Magic, Scarsdale, The Zone, heck even Oprah Winfrey's latest method. She visited their sites everyday, but lost not an ounce. She had also tried every possible fitness regime, too. But no matter what she tried, she still had those extra killergrams on her that she could not shed. She actually got a lot of exercise in her daily routine: she surfed the Net, jumped to conclusions, ran out of money, juggled her tasks, pushed her luck, drove her family mad and plowed through her paperwork, but still a thin body eluded her. How would she ever look as good as those women on the magazine covers in the grocery store? You know, the ones who stared back at you accusingly as you bought ice cream, pop, chips, candy and booze!

Etymology: Kilograms (metric weight unit of 1000 grams) & Killer (a difficulty that is hard to deal with;the causal agent resulting in death Example: "Heart disease is the biggest killer in America")

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COMMENTS:

heeheehee!!! - galwaywegian, 2009-01-09: 04:16:00

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Created by: lplybon

Pronunciation: "Fat-SI-tees"

Sentence: Over the past four months -- after her doctor scared the beejeesus out of her -- Sophie has religiously exercised, watched what she eats, and even goes to those (sometimes really irritating) support groups. And the result? A total loss of three stinking pounds. And to add insult to injury, Sophie notices that her fascites seems to have grown! How can that be!?!

Etymology: Combination of the word "fat" and "ascites"

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