Verboticisms

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: sales/clurk/sum/ness

Sentence: Sally's excitement about shopping at the new megastore was quickly squelched when she discovered the salesclirksomeness of the staff who flipped a 'this register closed' at 9 of the 10 queues.

Etymology: sales clerk + irksomeness(irritating, maddening, infuriating)

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: cus/tum/ur/swurv/iss

Sentence: Customerswervice was so bad that I couldn't even make eye contact with the cashier let alone pay for my purchases.

Etymology: customer service + swerve

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COMMENTS:

They also swerve who only fail to wait on us. Good one. - Mustang, 2008-05-13: 20:24:00

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: dĭ-sō'shē-ĭt

Sentence: After she made her way back to the electronics department, having to make her way past one dissociate after another who, apparently oblivious to her existence or that of any other customer, had no apparent function beyond taking up aisle space, the blue-smocked critters became scarce. When she finally found one and asked where she could find an adapter to use her ipod with her home stereo, the dull-eyed response was, "that's not my aisle, but if we have 'em they would definitely be in this half of the store."

Etymology: dissociate (-āt'), from the psychological defense mechanism dissociation, whereby an individual compartmentalizes certain thoughts, emotions, sensations, and/or memories; term coined by The French psychiatrist Pierre Janet, later expanded on in Jung's theories; associate (-ĭt), term used by a certain (world's largest)retailer as a euphamism for what passes as a sales staff.

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COMMENTS:

Like it! - pieceof314, 2008-05-13: 13:29:00

thanks, 314. first time I've tried to give a verbotomy to an existing word. - stache, 2008-05-13: 17:02:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: at ten duns

Sentence: Jason was typical of the attendunts a retail store can afford, someone who spent his whole shift texting and phoning friends. Jason made people sorry they stopped by. When the CEO came on a Royal Visit, the whole entourage got busy and decorated the store. Except Jason, who told his immediate supervisor (who was 17) that he had to catch up on his filing. I smell an audit coming. Jason is now filing again...his unemployment papers.

Etymology: Attendant (cashier or clerk) & Dunts (To strike; give a blow to; knock) &dunce (stupid person)

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Created by: tim1998samson

Pronunciation: diminion marsion

Sentence: I had another one of those diminionmartion cash me out today I mean diminion's my favourite store but when a diminionmartion checks me out it's the worst.

Etymology: A mix of diminion and martion.

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COMMENTS:

For those of you who don't know diminion was a grocery store that was recently was taken over by Metro - tim1998samson, 2009-06-29: 08:14:00

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Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation: mal-conn-ten-dant

Sentence: I am in a hurry but the staff in this shop are all such malcontendants there is no one who will serve me.

Etymology: Combination of malcontent and attendant. First used by Mark Twain to describe a particularly slovenly, family-run restaurant he visited in Mississippi. The restaurant gained notoriety and indeed some short lived success until it was forcibly closed by the owners who had a sense of humour failure when even physical abuse of the clientele wasn't enough to deter the hordes of malcontent-watchers.

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COMMENTS:

very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 15:40:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: snub skrybe

Sentence: "It's no wonder people shoplift", Betty thought as she waited yet again at Customer Service to make a payment on her layaway. The cashier was going to snubscribe her again because he was too busy yakking on his cellphone on a social call. Fed up, she went to the Store Manager and told him loudly that the hardest part about shopping there was the fact that you had to wait endlessly for them to take your money. The Store Manager would have responded to her sooner, but he was too busy texting someone...

Etymology: Snub (refuse to acknowledge;ignore) & Subscribe (receive or obtain by regular payment;pay (an amount of money) as a contribution to a charity or service, especially at regular intervals)

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Created by: tmcg5625

Pronunciation: in-shop-ord-in-ayshun

Sentence: Well friends, imagine my suprise when the shop keeper was playing non other than a bit of the old Ludwig Van! I strolled nonchalantly to the counter where i was my friends completely ignored! I dare say the only response to this kind of dreadful inshopordination is a bit of the old ultra violence.

Etymology: shop- sartorial purveyance. Insubordination- "Come over here and say that!"

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: dissed-sir-vissed

Sentence: June felt dissedserviced by the young cashier at the grocery. He was engrossed in texting his friends and flirting with the girls in the line next to him instead of paying attention to her. When she tried to get his attention he rolled his eyes. So, as a fequent customer, she felt justified in cussing him out.

Etymology: dissed: to show disrespect + serviced: assisted, helped

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Created by: rombus

Pronunciation: kr - ass - is - tant

Sentence: Dominick was waited on by a crassistant in the local Starbucks.... She grudgingly took his order because he interrupted her "texting" marathon.

Etymology: crass (lacking in discrimination and sensibility), assistant

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COMMENTS:

good one - Mustang, 2009-06-26: 02:17:00

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