Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n., A set of product instructions, or a warning label, which is so obviously self-evident that it should be completely unnecessary. v., To provide unneeded directions, advice and/or warnings.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Lobotohowto
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: Low + Bot + To + How + To
Sentence: As Howard opened the box and plugged in his new electric can opener, he noiced a small booklet, which he identified as another lobotohowto. It offered the usual helpful hints such as "do not put fingers near sharp moving blades", "do not use to open hazardous materials", "do not put in dishwasher" and finally, "do not use to cut out coupons". He wondered how many hands, fingers, knees and toes had been saved by these little tidbits.
Etymology: Lobotomy is added to "how-to" (a set of instructions or manual) to yield a booklet or pamphlet of instructions meant for someone who has had sections of their brain removed.
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Love it! - metrohumanx, 2008-11-06: 23:48:00
----------------------------
Klutztructions
Created by: Tigger
Pronunciation: /kluht-struk-shuhns/
Sentence: The klutztructions that came with Donna's toaster said not to use a knife to pry out the toast if it got stuck, so she shrugged and grabbed a fork instead.
Etymology: klutz - a stupid or foolish person(from Yiddish, klots "clumsy person") + instructions (from Latin, instructus "to put in order")
Dimstructions
Created by: Dougalistic
Pronunciation: Dim-struct-shuns
Sentence: That's a bit of an obvious dimstruction
Etymology: Dim & Instruction
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
nice combo - silveryaspen, 2008-01-08: 13:20:00
----------------------------
Guidunce
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Guy-dunce
Sentence: When Tom bought a tin of gloss paint to brighten up his front door he was amazed at the guidunce given, when he read on the back of the label, 'WARNING' 'Do not eat contents'. He wondered how long it had taken the production team to come up with that little gem!
Etymology: Guidance(Advice,information) + Dunce(a person who is slow to learn, or not intelligent) = Guidunce
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Was he licking the paint off his finger at the time? - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-05: 14:57:00
Ha Ha. No but he ate the brush when he finished, that didn't come with instructions! - TJayzz, 2008-11-05: 16:21:00
----------------------------
Knowshow
Created by: paintergrl1313
Pronunciation: No-sho
Sentence: These hair dryer instructions are common sense, a real knowshow.
Etymology: To show someone what they should already know. Also a play on no show, cause anyone that needs a knowshow has no show common sense.
Stupifluous
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: stoop if loo us
Sentence: LuLu thought it ironic that when she bought a simple item like a comb for her hair, it came with lengthy instructions. Unwrap plastic around comb, place on top if head and pull through hair to detangle and smooth it. It was too bad that these stupifluous instructions did not come with furniture that needed assembly. Either the only clue to assembly was a simple diagram without enough detail or something written in Swedish. And don't get her started about those instructions that were very badly translated into English...they would have been clearer in their original lingo!
Etymology: Stupid (without much intelligence) & Superflous (more than is needed, desired, or required;extra;unnecessary)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
and it\'s fun to say. - artr, 2010-04-05: 12:08:00
----------------------------
Retarditure
Created by: day4ghee
Pronunciation: RET-ARD-IT-URE
Sentence: BECKY SOON LEARNED THE IMPORTANCE OF RETARDITURE AFTER DROPPING HER MEGADRY 21,0000 IN THE TUB.
Etymology:
Caveabsurdigious
Created by: mrskellyscl
Pronunciation: kah-vey-ab-sur-di-gous
Sentence: The folks in legal, being highly tagmatic, applied caveabsurdigious directions to every product to protect the company from lawsuits that may come due to accidents or death by stupidity.
Etymology: caveat: legalese term for warning, caution; an explanation or qualification + absurd:ridiculously unreasonable or illogical + litigious: tending to engage in lawsuits
Reduhndants
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: re duh n dants
Sentence: The instructions for the new hairdryer Millie bought were a bunch of reduhndants in her mind. "Point at wet hair" & "Blow until dry" seemed self-evident to her. Too bad they forgot the old "Don't plug in near water" instruction, declared the EMT sent in response to Millie's roommate's 911 call...
Etymology: Redundance (more than is needed, desired, or required;use of more words than required/necessary to express an idea) & Duh (Used to express disdain for something deemed stupid or obvious, especially a self-evident remark)
Clodicil
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: KLOD-uh-suhl
Sentence: Bob fell into an uncontrollable fit of laughter when he noticed that the clodicil on his cup of coffee read: "CONTENTS ARE HOT." And he laughed so much that he spilled the contents over his hands, and now is suing the coffee shop owner for damages.
Etymology: Blend of CLOD: a dolt, blockhead & CODICIL: a short writing containing an explanation .. for a blockhead.
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James
OZZIEBOB - 2008-01-09: 03:47:00
Great word!
Today's definition was suggested by yellowbird. Thank you yellowbird. ~ James